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OK, my advice is set the swinging/sex idea aside for a moment. You say you have anxiety issues. Think about how you usually deal with those? Just think about it in terms of going out to a new place, with new people. Think about your standard coping mechanisms. Turn to them and apply them here. Now, once you've thought of those, we can open up the idea of sex. The idea of sex is, I'm sure, adding to the anxiety. So I guess my advice here is, give yourself permission to NOT have sex. You don't have to. You've already gone to the club a couple of times, not had sex and had a good time. Do that again. If, while you are there, you and your partners all feel that the mood is right for sex, go for it. If any of you... especially yourself... don't feel it's right, don't do it. If you started, and it feels wrong, stop. Just say "I'm not feeling this" or "I'm sorry, I don't want to continue right now" and step away. That is OK. It is always OK. The key here is don't put pressure on yourself to go and have sex. Go and have fun. If that fun involves crazy acts of naked passion, great. If it involves sitting around chatting with your partner, great. Whatever works for you on the night.

My wife is stunning. She is multi orgasmic. She can cum in every position. Sometimes, when she is really turned on, she'll cum while giving a blowjob. The sexiest thing in the world to me is her pleasure face. Watching the pleasure engulf her is so amazing. I can watch while in missionary, or when she is riding me but I can't watch when I'm doing her from behind. The first time we were in a foursome, she was blowing me while someone else did her from behind. I got to watch her try to focus on my cock while she started to cum from someone doing her from behind. It was unbelievable. The question is why do guys like this? That's why. My wife loves giving blowjobs. She gets pleasure from it. I love watching her get pleasure. I would guess the guys who do enjoy watching their wives have similar views. Their wives are sexy, and when their wife is having a good time, they are having a good time.

I didn’t want to watch and at first was horrified when she first took him in her mouth even if our own sex always involves oral. I expected the sex and didn’t think it all through. Looking back it was hot and it was satisfying knowing she did a great job. In subsequent meeting I did enjoy watching.

Michael enjoys watching me do anything I enjoy doing. What makes any person enjoy anything in life? Do you watch sad movies, comedies, mysteries, or listening to different types of music? Why do people go to museums to see abstract art? Why do people enjoy porn? Is it strange I enjoy seeing a new penis? Michael has said my whole body changes when I know I am with someone new. I normally enjoy watching how a man changes physically as he grows and how his balls react, how he will tighten his butt. I enjoy going slow and he has told me he can see if I am enjoying by how I attack a blow job. I don’t tell a partner to face fuck as I enjoy the act of a slow time and let the guy see what I am enjoying.

No I hate being choked and I don't like choking my GF either although she loves to be choked. I am not even a big fan of facefucking myself. I enjoy watching her get facefucked more than I enjoy facefucking her myself. But my GF loves getting facefucked. I'm not 100% sure why. She is very submissive so maybe that plays into it but she says she enjoys it and a lot of guys enjoy fucking her face so who am I to stop it? I've posted on the whole facefucking thing before. It's grown in popularity to where it has almost become commonplace. I think some of this is due to the porn today. It seems to be everywhere. I've had the conversation with my GF before as to how she can like getting facefucked, choked, slapped, etc so much and she just shrugs it off as saying it's fun and that what seems like it might be painful or uncomfortable actually isn't when it's in a sexual setting for her. She always tells people if you yank her hair in the street she'll flip out but if you do it when you're fucking her doggystyle she'll get turned on. She enjoys that stuff much more than I do. She has pulled my hair so hard before that I've told her to stop. So yeah, we are very different.

I don’t understand liking her gagging. Gagging means she can’t breathe and not something I would want to see someone I love going through. Do you enjoy being choked, I know some men do, not any I know. Some men like to be demeaned I just never understood.

What I count as my first shared sexual experience was when we were in our early 20s. I had broken up with my ex-fiancé Red, who I was still seeing, sharing the details of my personal life with, and screwing, while dating David, the guy who would become my husband. David and I had sex after a date, then I went to see Red, told him what had happened, and had sex with him as well. Or maybe it was several weeks later when David said that he knew I was still screwing Red (I talked about him a lot) and was OK with it. Or maybe it was months later when we had our first not-so-awkward and normal feeling MFM. It felt strangely normal and empowering for me that two men could love me despite me loving the other. BTW, David is still my husband, Red is still my boyfriend and I have children with both.