Leaderboard

Hubby here (Wifey makes me be the one typing via process of "not it" lol), but we're newbies here and have tried to be mindful of differing opinions and we have enjoyed observing, reading, learning although also admitting that this pandemic has been a real downer on some of our early explorations (just over a year ago). These boards have helped keep interest for both of us and to the point where we've been daring enough to post a few pics just to participate in the community and escape our reality a bit (being in healthcare we've both seen the pandemic from unique angles and it sure has a way of making you feel helpless to make a difference). We do post via unverified pics on Reddit as a way to do this to but Reddit is a mess of positive and negative folks, so this place generally (to us) has a very positive vibe. So it's been refreshing to come on here and read/learn/observe.

I like the word compersion. You enjoy another person receiving pleasure, as I understand it.

Here is my weak attempt of making humor out of a serious situation: The three big lies: * Your check is in the mail. * I will not cum in your mouth. * I've been vaccinated.

Or when the judge throws their ass in jail for violating the restraining order . . .

Just a few comments on this: Firstly, people are judgmental. It is human nature. It doesn't matter what social group(s) with which they happen to associate. And everyone has the right to their private thoughts and opinions, including judgments about others. The issue is when one group, or a society, starts to impose limits on the liberties of another group or individual. This is where things get tricky. Secondly, words definitely matter. Unfortunately, they matter a lot less today than they have in the past. Our ability to communicate and understand complex, nuanced ideas, either verbally or with the written word, is quickly diminishing. For me, the "canary in the coal mine" is what many literary critics describe as the "death" of the long-form novel. Not coincidentally, literary critics themselves are going extinct. Thanks to the advent of the "digital age" (All hail Nitwitter and Faceboo!) the whole of western civilization seems to have developed a case of collective Attention Deficit Disorder. If a thought cannot be expressed in 280 characters, or if it doesn't pass the "purity test" of the Faceboo Gustapo, it doesn't deserve consideration.

I say yes. Once things are “back to normal,” people have short memories. But the comeback may be slow at first. Men with six foot penises will be accepted first. They can perform at socially acceptable distances.

We would like to have received vaccinations but being full-time residents of Pennsylvania and spending just two months in Florida made the chance of getting vaccine very small. We saw on a TV news broadcast that part-time residents were allowed if they could show documentation but the process for submitting this documentation turned out to be more difficult than finding our way out of an escape room. We put a call into that PA hospital at which we have both received treatment in the past and are awaiting a call-back.

Even a couple's profile does not get instant response at a swingers' websites. My wife and I have have been very successful in the lifestyle and we received no response to our SLS profile until nine months after we first posted it. Even after fifteen years of having an SLS profile we get maybe two responses per year. The good news is that after we got to know a few people these people introduced us to other people who introduced us to other people -- we do not, essentially, need SLS any longer. Any ideas? A singe male who sets up on-line profile and simply waits for something to happen will grow a very long beard before receiving a response. It is much more effective to reach out and send messages to profiles that indicate interest in meeting single men. If at first you don't succeed, try try again. Post Script: If your on-line profile has no pictures, expect zero replies.

The language is indeed imprecise. On some level, it is self-correcting as it allows for neologisms (such as "compersion" that njbm mentioned)--coinage of new terms helps all, but this takes time. As adamgunn experienced, it is one thing to "tolerate" what others choose to do. It is quite different when you learn that someone you care deeply about has an alternative lifestyle, different-than-what-you-thought sexual orientation or gender identity. All too often, they fear rejection, ostracism, or worse. Tolerance is not enough, one must embrace. That embrace may not be enough, one must rejoice. It's worth remembering that every casual acquaintance of (y)ours is someone else's family member or loved one.

I also would love to take it further, lovefest. Unfortunately, there are limits as to what love and tolerance will accomplish, given that some other people choose not to love or tolerate other's actions. Your example is very poignant to me. I have a lesbian daughter. I knew of her lifestyle when she was in college, but I felt I couldn't come out and say, "Hey, I know, it's okay." What I did was be careful never to say a discouraging word about it, and when appropriate praise the LGBT movement. When she finally admitted it to me a decade later my comment was, "What took you so long?" and we both laughed our asses off. The only other word I can think of that seems apt may be 'condone.'

True. However, I'm being realistic, not pessimistic. The director of the CDC acknowledged recent data indicates the virus is mutating in such a way as to render the current vaccines significantly less effective. I am optimistic research teams will continue to find ways to respond. But I am not optimistic that there is going to be a conclusive "end" to this virus anytime soon, if ever.

Obviously, item three is a politically incendiary post. However, it may be worth considering the people on the other side of that argument are equally worried about being "disenfranchised" thanks to a system that is fraught with the potential for fraud and abuse. Reasonable people on both sides genuinely want every legal vote counted. The question is how best to make that happen? I think most would agree the current system is an unqualified mess, regardless of if one's candidate(s) won or lost.

Sometimes it's not the verb, but the context that matters. Consider three non-sexual scenarios... 1. Our home backs up on lovely woods. Someone buys those woods and puts up a three story home and we now look into a wall of aluminum siding. (hypothetical, we back up onto a ravine, no one will build there) 2. Those new neighbors have an older relative living with them who has decided to forego aggressive cancer therapy that might be successful in favor of living the time she has left without treatment, in direct contradiction to what her (and our) spiritual leader has told her (hypothetical, has not happened to our knowledge) 3. The matriarch of those new neighbors is a state legislator and has announced her support for a bill aimed squarely at restricting voting rights in our state by eliminating mail-in voting and demanding that all voters physically show up and produce a state issued driver license or equivalent. (Such a process is indeed happening in our state where one party lost to another party that effectively waged a campaign to turn out the mail-in vote, but there is no matriarch in our backyard who is a state legislator). What is the expected level of "tolerance" here? Reciprocally, if *you* happen to be erecting the new home, if *you* happen to be the person foregoing the treatment, if *you* happen to be the legislator, do you expect your actions to be tolerated? The first situation impinges on what we might perceive to be a right and would likely cause us to check with the planning commission, try to reach an amicable agreement, file a lawsuit, or--failing all that--move; the second might pain us but is clearly none of our business; and the third we would object to vehemently on the principle that no one should be disenfranchised, and if an elected legislator lives across the street we are going to let them -- and the neighborhood--know our opinion.

I had joined a couple of OF sites looking for my particular "kink" interest & found that (after paying) none had what I wanted. I tried to cancel one site before the auto signup kicked in but couldn't get the page with the cancel site up. Nothing I could do to get the page up so......it auto renewed. It took the site (OF) over a week to get back to as to how to cancel so I cancelled my entire OF's account. Funny but they contacted me the same day about my cancellation.

I totally agree with your point that words, and their definitions, matter. Without them, we cannot communicate. Without disagreeing with you, I have no problem with the verb 'tolerate.' If I'm doing something that another doesn't choose to partake in, or actually upsets them, it makes no difference to me if they then decide to tolerate me and my behavior. I really don't expect them to 'rejoice' in my behavior. But as long as they don't try to do anything that would harm me because of my behavior (which is what I think tolerate means,) I'm fine. When they don't tolerate me and my behavior, when they talk about me behind my back, when they report me to authorities, when they actually start shooting at me, then we have a serious problem.

We were at a house party with a nice couple. The husband of the couple regaled us with a story of a gentleman at another party who had a micropenis. We didn’t find the story too interesting. We are not into dick shaming. Same for boobs. We went on to play with that couple and the husband had ED. Maybe he gave himself the whammy with his micropenis talk.

You are a real man. Your dick doesn't make you a man any more than a woman's breasts make her a woman. A woman who is in a relationship with you might enjoy having another man who has a bigger dick than yours, but that doesn't make you less of a man. My wife and I have had a number of MFM threesomes. A couple of the men had dicks decidedly larger than mine and one of those was huge. I was surprised my wife could take him. It was hot to watch that enormous penis go inside of her. But, it didn't make me feel less like a man nor did she think I was a lesser man than that guy. If you're with a woman who thinks you're not a real man because you have a small dick, you're with the wrong woman.

Single males are welcomed by a small subset of swingers. While there are good guys out there there are also a lot of guys just looking for sex partners and for many couples other couples are preferable and safer. So while it takes some work for couples to find compatible couples and friends there is at least a little more in common for couples. If you are polite and let people know you are interested those that are interested will let you know.

You are no more a mess than many other posters. I think many are masturbating while posting

I was never a prolific poster here, but I have found myself spending less time here over the past year. I'm sure you can guess the reason (Covid, cough, cough). I haven't been to a house/hotel party or meet 'n greet in just about a year and it's frustrating. The last thing I want to do is spend a lot of time commiserating with other frustrated swingers. It's just too depressing.

Please don't ever think that, we welcome all of your posts! Speaking as the webmaster of this site, here's the simple truth - the number of new posts is directly correlated to the health and continued viability of this site. Like it or not, that's in Google's hands. Google sees it as "fewer posts must mean something is wrong with that place so we aren't going to send people there, more posts must mean something is right about that site and we will send more people there." So, it's sort of a feedback loop. You can easily enter into a death spiral of less activity, which means less Google traffic, which means fewer new members, which means less activity, and so on until the day comes the lights have to get switched off. There's a saying, "Content is king". As @lcmim mentioned, we work really hard at keeping this place welcoming and a good environment for people to post their questions and thoughts aka content. One, because that's the right thing to do to have the type of community we want to have here, and two, because it's the strategy we have chosen to maintain a viable site. It's frustrating sometimes when you see the anything goes kind of sites outperforming yours, at least in the short term. But, this site as been around 20+ years and is still kicking, and that's eons in internet years, so we must be doing something right. So, moral of story, please post, and then post some more, and encourage other people to post :) Those things all help the site.

With the Swingersboard generally, I find it easy to pass over posts that I'm not interested in, ignore the very few posts that rude/offensive/stupid, and appreciate the vast majority of what I read. In an increasingly insane world, I am glad for this place and the honest, polite and intelligent people it attracts.

Sometimes life just happens and 'hobbies' are put on hold. I know there was a month or two last year where I wasn't as active with the passing of my father. Now I just wish things would go back to 'normal' so we can start enjoying our 'hobby' again.

When on a diet, most would prefer to stay out of the bakery aisle.

Our first time was a bit impromptu if you will... we were on vacation at the beach. We had decided to do a week long trip in July just the two of us to get away from things. My husband and I had been open about our past before but we had never considered anything like an open marriage/swinging etc. On night 3 we decided to go to a local favorite bar of ours. This place was kind of a staple in the area we were staying and we had been on several occasions on past vacations. Loud music, cheap drinks and a beach atmosphere so pretty much a perfect spot on the ocean. We have never been the jealous type so he had danced with a few women and me a few men nothing more than fun. I had mentioned a few times about my attraction to older men mostly celebrities and people I would never really meet much less have the opportunity to sleep with in real life. He had done the same about girls he found attractive. As the night went on and we continued to drink the lines got a little blurred. I will say I dont recommend trying this especially on the first try with alcohol or any other enhancers but here we are... In walked a nice looking older man probably 30 years my senior (mid 50's) and sat down next to us at the bar. A few rounds of drinks and conversation he asked me to dance. I had gave my husband the "look" and he nodded his approval. We danced to a few songs and i returned to the bar where my husband was laughing... What!? i said and he glanced at me... You think he's hot dont you? UHM... i remember vividly that's all i could say. Like a blur we were in our car my husband driving and him and I making out in the backseat. After a quick stop for some condoms we were in our room. The sex was amazing and it was a fantasy come true in all honesty because I had never been with a substantially older person before let alone a complete stranger. When i woke up the next morning i remember my husband asking me if i wanted to meet him again. In my current state of confusion and addmittingly hungover i remember saying i dont even know his name... My husband said well we have been texting all morning. They are still friends on social media and text on occasion as do him and I. We have never met up since then but its def on our list of things to do at some point. The rest is history from that point on we were swingers.

Very very hot.

The most stand out event in our lives from swinging was when my wife was pregnant for the third time. She was going to have twins. When they were born, they were two fraternal black boys. We are still not sure who the father is but we don't care. Our lives have been better for having them. There older brothers, who are mine and my wife's, will take ya down if you say anything against them. Their bond is very strong. All four are married. We are very blessed.

I misinterpreted the title of this post and was thinking back to when I trimmed my bush into a square. I've also tried the landing strip rectangle, inverted the triangle, and once tried a circle.

We play primarily with my old school friends from college. I can say that my whole life changed because of being introduced to this lifestyle. I say playing with people you already know and have something in common with is so much better than chancing it with strangers. Cheating with an old classmate is just that, cheating. Cheating is not swinging. I don’t know your situation, I couldn’t cheat and live with it. I needed to tell the person I cared that I had sex with someone else. That is me and I don’t condemn others for their choices.

One of my favorite memories is the time that my wife and I had her first full swap with another couple. Up until a certain point in that night, we had to been having a soft swap out with the other couple. Lots of wandering hands And oral between both couples. At one point my wife looked up and said "all right now, I don't care whose dick it is but somebody is going to fuck me now! " it was so hot to hear my wife be so blunt and into the experience. I promptly obliged and began to slide inside her briefly. I then watched another man have fun with my wife for the first time :-)

This is a pretty fun thread!! This past New Years Kiko and I were at Couple's Choice here in Chicago. Typically New Years is fun but not a lot of play, people get pretty drunk. Anyhow clock strikes 12 and we figure nothing was going to happen. I go to the bathroom and on my way back notice a couple is playing in the bondage room with the doors open, so people can watch. I run over and give Kiko the heads ups. We go over to the viewing area/ door and start watching this naked red head getting whipped with a belt while she was strapped to the wall. I suggest a blindfold, which she eagerly agrees to. So myself and her partner blindfold her( not even sure what article of clothing we used). Then I suggest he mix in something soft with the belt. We use my shirt with he and my wife using the belt and me driving her wild with the shirt. So at this point a bit of a crowd has gathered. So now the girls ( there were like four including the red head and Kiko ) are taking turns spanking each other bottoms while I gave them the soft sensation of my shirt!! So now the guy in the couple that originally has the room kicks everybody out and asks us to stay. Kiko and I agree, he begins to introduce himself and the red head yells...'No, no names', that I remember DISTINCTLY. In fact Kiko and I still joke about it. So the red head demands to be locked up again and spanked harder. So until this time I hadn't really spanked anyone, but since she wanted to be spanked harder, everyone looked at me. It's not really my thing, the soft part earlier is definitely, but hey she was a hot naked red head demanding me to spank her. Anyhow my wife, Kiko and the other guy start entertaining themselves on the one side of the big bed in the room, the red head and I, after a good spanking did likewise on the other side. and 'no names'...great night.

Her first time with another man in front of me since we were married couldn't have been more perfect. She was so shy and nervous it was like watching a virgin. She kept her eyes closed from the moment she was naked and laying on her back on the bed waiting for him. As he began to press his cock into her her mouth and eyes opened wide to look at him and down at his cock as he pushed into her.

My most memorable moment didn't even involve sex. We were having a custom home built. The builder I'd selected was about our age and my wife thought he was good looking. His wife was a complete knockout. We became more than clients and had become pretty good friends during the months the house was being built. One evening we were at their home. During conversation something was said about something and a certain man's name was mentioned. This was a man that my wife and I had swinging experiences with and we, instantly, knew that if they knew him too then we shared something special with them. There was a moment of silence as all four of us knew what had been revealed, then there were big grins all around. That sure expanded the friendship.