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I don't disagree, Andrew. I also reserve the right to make judgements about people based on their boundaries. After all, someone's behavior shows their character. If a couple is OK with playing with a woman who is bi (no bi action, they just know she is bi), and they are not OK playing with a couple where the guy is bi (no bi action, they just know he is bi), that says something about their attitudes. There is a hang up there. I am not saying it is sin, just that it is a double standard. They are treating bi men differently than bi women. We are not big fans of double standards in general, and when we encounter one, we wonder. I gave up pretending to have no bi interest on profiles because I don't like lying. If a couple is that freaked out simply because I am bi, they are not the couple for us.

My wife is scheduled for April 7 and May 7. I was vaccinated on Feb 16 and March 16, so my two weeks after vax is approaching.

I’m not sure where you are on the list, you should still get the vaccine when you can. Unfortunately too many people near us are not getting vaccination and the numbers in NJ are still rising and are the some of the highest in the country. Warm weather is coming and I want to get back to doing normal things like getting back to Gunnisons Beach.

Okay, the question I asked was oriented towards can you get an effective erection. You can, you have great sex with your wife. So, it appears that your block comes from when you go to playing with the other wife. Yeah, it's all in your head! My original advice stands. Try to talk your wife and this couple into having a separate rooms session, let them know it's to help you grow out of this problem - I'm sure they want to help you as much as you say you need help. Also, I like the advice njbm gave you about trying viagra rather than Cialis. The good news is, once you get over this hump you should be over it permanently. Good luck, let us know what happens.

A positive antibody test to COVID can include those COVID viruses that cause common colds and don't necessarily mean that the person had SARS-CoV-2 unless that was documented with a virus SARS-CoV-2 test when infected. And then there are the old false positive/negative results in the mix. Good to hear everyone is feeling well but cautious.

To be in the mood for a gang bang you typically have had at least one real one. Not a pretend one. She just wants to feel you, yet you're pretending to be others, in short not being you. This cancels out her one request. Also, your login also shows up on dating sites. Perhaps you're single? You ejaculated several times? You fucked her ten times?

Do you guys just see a few people or do virtual stuff?

You should have expected her enthusiasm with a new partner. She obviously enjoyed herself and responded accordingly and is up for doing it again. You should be happy for her enjoyment not your bruised ego.

They keep lowering the age and opening up to more people. It’s crazy that smokers get priority, what do I know.

We both received our Positive results for the SARS-CoV-2 (Covid 19) DiaSorin Ab IGG The results do say there are false positives possible due to other past human coronavirus infections which infrequently occur. Being we both tested Positive I’m not sure of the odds we both got false positives. We have plans with out of town friends that both have been vaccinated to visit us this week. They want to see NYC and have waited for this week but knowing we weren’t vaccinated they were unsure if they should stay with us. She was one of the first friends I played with and it’s been a long time since we have seen them.

Another option, assuming all parties agree, is to start off together perhaps watching the ladies and/ or soft play - then go to a separate room with his wife. You need to concentrate and be present with her. The fewer distractions - the better - at this point. Stop worrying about your T levels, but definitely go easy on the alcohol.

@adamgunn I can't really say if I could penetrate my wife because we've never really tried during our swing sessions. I can say that after the first couple of times, me and the wife were so turned on by the experience, we had great sex immediately afterward and for several weeks that followed. After this occurrence, I was so embarrassed and disappointed in myself, I just wasn't feeling it. There is nothing that puts a damper on things quite like having to watch 2 gorgeous women suck on your flaccid penis and wonder what the fuck is going on. @Sunday I do sometimes, but it is rare. I have low T, just not low enough for the Dr to treat it. "Normal" levels are something like 300-1200. I'm a 31 year old with a 321 T level, but to the dr, I'm "normal". I know this could give me some issues, but my equipment works just for 90% of the time with the wife. This makes me think that the issue is something else. @Fitlakecouple we would be open to a mfm, but we are not sure how comfortable we would be with a stranger. We kind of feel into this when we found out this couple we have been friends with for many years are in the lifestyle. We are 100% comfortable with each other because of the familiarity we have. Not sure if we, more so the wife, would be as comfortable with anyone else. @PeterJ that could very well be the issue. After the first encounter, which was a failure, I have tried going great lengths to make sure it didnt happen again. I got my t tested, got put on Cialis, started eating better, started working out, none of which seem to be making much of a difference. I kinda think that the first failure, which I believe was simply caused by too much alcohol, is still weighing on the back of my mind. As far as your second comment, we have definitely had a great time on each of our play dates, aside from the erection problems. I mean, I was content just watching the wife in action. Its just so hot watching her giving and receiving pleasure. This alone has made sure I have had a great time at each of our dates. But the one time that I was able to participate, that just took it to a whole other level. There is nothing quite like making out with your wife while she rides your best friend and your dick is in his wife doggy style. So, as much as I enjoy the oral play and the show my wife puts on, I just can't be satisfied until I can get back in the game. This last part is a reply to everyone. When we first started the night, we were just playing some games. There was lots of oral and manual stimulation and I was erect throughout. After the games, the wife's put on a show for about 30 minutes while us guys sat back and watched. Again, I was erect throughout. But when it came time for penetration, the erection quickly went away. Hell I was even erect watching my friend having his threesome with the wives but, once again, it went away every time I tried to join in. I eventually got off while receiving a double blowjob, so I guess it wasn't a complete failure. I just want to fix whatever the issue is before they decide to move along from us.

I think that everyone should be treated as an individual. And that every individual has the right to decided his/her own boundaries. Period.

Agree with all of above. Bet separate room would help. Also, try Viagra. More targeted in my experience.

First question, of course, is are you able to penetrate your wife? Second, are you able to penetrate her in the presence of the other couple? It's probable that you are on mental overload. The good news is once you are over the hump, this should be cured. Of course, how do you do that? If the other people are willing, I'd make this suggestion. Swap in different rooms; you'd be with the other wife without the distraction of the other couple. Turn the lights very low, perhaps off. Or you might try wearing a blindfold. And of course, use no alcohol or recreational drugs. Best of luck.

You get what you pay for. My other favorite saying is “ buy for value, be prepared to pay twice.”

Hope you are Positive and have the antibodies. That would mean you had Covid and no bad effects that go with it. Lioness I have been so jealous of you. Mike and I always enjoy reading your posts.

We just found out that our closest friend has tested positive for antibodies SARS-Cov-2 meaning he might have been exposed to Covid-19. He said he did have a cold some time ago with no fever. We have been with him many times since the pandemic started. We have been with and another friend on a pretty consistent basis, none of us have any major symptom of the virus. We all had been going for Covid testing in the height of the pandemic with consistent negative results. We are now going for antibody tests too as we feel we would have to have been exposed if he was.

Not sure why it’s so difficult to understand why the hosting club only wants bi-comfortable, open-minded, men and women in attendance at a bi male themed party. They simply want to create an environment where m/m play can go on without gawkers or those who feel it may be fun sport to harass, name call, or ridicule. Worse, would be the outraged reaction of a homophobic male if approached by another male. So, if you are triggered by the word “Safe” and insulted at the very notion – maybe you aren’t the guy to be there on said Friday evening…

We had some fun using our new phones and then watching on a 75 inch tv. It caused plenty of laughs both in recording and playback nobody was able to stop laughing.

Perhaps you're not a minority (neither am I) or you don't have any close friends who are minorities. Perhaps you've heard about the recent atrocities that happened to Asian-American women. When you're not in the mainstream, you can tend to become worried about the 'straights' (I mean that as any non-minority, not just sexual,) and can be a bit paranoid from time to time. I think the Florida Treehouse announcement and the reference to safe place is meant to calm bi-men who aren't used to being out in public.

We have made a few short home videos. I usually do the filming and it comes out pretty crappy. My GF has and continues to make videos with other guys which is much hotter. I have filmed her with other guys a few times and they have also filmed her. One of my friends went to school for film and he goes all out when he films them together. He knows how to do the cameras, lighting, and even the roleplaying/ acting. It's as good as any porn you would find on the internet. I'm not a fan of being on camera but my GF loves it and I love watching her on it so it works out pretty well for us. Both her and my buddies make special videos of her fucking for me from time to time and I get extremely turned on watching them.

Definitely have, a lot. And it's not easy being the lighting guy, camera man, sound engineer, production assistant, the director AND the talent. 3-some and 4-somes are easier as a player who is taking the bench for a shift can hold the camera. And it's fun later to see their perspective/ what interests them. Gotta a nice library built up now so I whack-it to my wife like 95-percent of the time. She's my favorite porn star. ??

We have just been enjoying the hell out of each other throughout this pandemic and are both more then okay with that! We are planning on waiting until it is over before resuming any play with others. Sure it is fun being free and playing with others, but it is not the end of the world if we are not. Our sex life together has never been lacking and each other are always our first choice for great sex anyways. There is no shortage of people out there still actively playing though from the amount of messages we are still getting. We choose not to be part of the problem as far as this thing spreading further. Others can make their own choice.

We are getting invites from vaccinated friends. We only have one of four vaccines, my wife too young and healthy, not eligible yet.

We have exactly three certs on our profile. One a year, every year we accept one and drop one off. Just to let people know we are still in the game, not enough to show who all our friends are, or how often we play. We often ask the people we play with if they would like a cert, if they would we send one. (Yeah, I know they can follow us back, but . . .) For couples, some do, some don't. But the single gentlemen we play with almost always want the cert. (And we only offer the cert if we would play with them again.)

I think you are reading too much into it.

We don't give or accept validations (certifications). It has zero to do with the other couple. We simply don't like the idea of displaying a running tab of our encounters - good, bad, or otherwise. That said, if it's that important to you, ask them to do it. Hardly drama.

My Spidey-sense is tingling. I think you're right cutting-off all communication with him. You've asked him politely in the past to not contact you anymore and he hasn't respected that, so what would make him respect any other boundaries with your husband and your marriage? I think it's time to block his phone number and email address.

I appreciate you sharing your personal experience and advice. I haven’t had too many people I could talk to about this, so I appreciate it. He’s been blocked and luckily we’re moving out of state in a couple months, which also helps with the swing club issue. Thanks for the response!

Going into this you both KNEW it was NSA, but at some point, HE forgot this and attached strings. Him coming back 'pleading' should have told you this. Saw this coming a mile away. Our partners usually want us to be happy and so, unless the lines of communication are completely open, they have the tendency to say what we want to hear instead of what they want to say. Just a reminder for all of us, OUR PARTNER COMES FIRST, ALWAYS. Also, if this was truly just a FWB on your side, you wouldn't keep talking with him as well. You also have some feelings for him and he knows that. Did he tell you this BEFORE you told him it was over, or after? Sounds like he was going for your sympathy. This is beginning to really wave the :redflag:. You really should have blocked him a long time ago. That you keep communicating with him lets him think that there's still a chance for him. BTW, the new FWB might have also been an attempt to make you jealous. Read: I would rather have you. Because he would rather have you and you keep giving him the feeling that there is a chance by talking with him. How do I know? Well, while it didn't involve swinging, I was the guy in this same situation. We couldn't be together because of distances and I was in a loveless marriage where I was staying for my son, but every now and then we would still talk so I knew she also still had feelings towards me. She had even eventually gotten married, but we would still talk and I kept thinking maybe someday we would be together. It wasn't healthy for her and it sure wasn't healthy for me. Eventually I had to block her so I could move on with my life instead of being stuck hoping for something that was a fantasy in my mind. It was a dark time of my life and very hard to do, but it was the right thing to do. You really should be worried. Block him and move on with your life and your husband. Remember, this will only hurt your husband more if things continue. If you do run into him, just ignore him and if he presses you, be polite but explain that it was fun but now it's over and leave. Even in the best case, nothing good will come out of this, and that's the BEST CASE. The worst case...is scary. Congratulations to the both of you. Keep things going between the two of you, but DON"T end up back were you started by letting this other guy back in. No matter what you may say, there are some feelings between the both of you, but you need to put an end to it. Block him and move forward with your husband. Good luck and I wish you the best.

We all, including my wife and I, are into the lifestyle for the fun. Why ruin it with this drama? This guy is not making your collective situation better, so move on.

Just block him . . . If you run into him at a club, ignore him.

Yeah, we figured that out the hard way unfortunately. Lol We are definitely ready to get back at it though, just with newfound boundaries in place ?

Regardless of how it starts for me, which is often with his dick in my mouth, it ends with his sperm swimming in my vagina, uterus, fallopian tubes. I keep a living part of him in me for days! That's what thrills me. I've probably had sperm living in me continuously for the last 12 years.

I've always been pretty orally inclined and I absolutely love sucking dick. My favorite part is when he cums and I steal his soul! ??????

True, but I prefer licking my girl partners' pussy over sucking dick. I like DP, but it's not a usual undertaking because of the difficulty in getting it set up right. Doing guys one after the other (either hole) is easier and more natural. But what it comes down to for us is who I love, who is in the family, who I have sex with most. Two other women and me sharing two men, I can live with that because I love them.

Right now, I'm the hinge between 2 guys in a poly relationship. I agree that Coupler's ratio can be challenging for the guys, although she mentioned that she discovered her lesbian side during their journey that might compensate for the ratio. For me, my ideal ratio, if our polycule will grow, is like 3 guys, and 2 women.

I think from a stamina level two guys for three women is a bad ratio. It is the reason I do not care for FFM 3sums. Unless the guy is a serious stud, like you find in porn, he isn't gonna be able to hold off his orgasm till both women orgasm, so one of us is stuck with a tongue. For me the Sapphic stuff is fun but its a warm up, its foreplay, at some point I want the Dick. But I have a friend and she is completely happy to be licked, sucked, and fingered, once she has cum she is just happy, while I'm trying to decide who's fucking me in the shower. I guess different people like different things.

Sounds like it to me. The only red flag to me is that six weeks is an awfully short time. Rebound sex plus some NRE might easily be mistaken for love. Personally I would rein in my enthusiasm. Make sure no one makes any decisions in this matter. Meanwhile , as friends you can supply a solid, safe, even intimate space in which she can heal. In the long run? Maybe you end up as a triad, maybe as very good friends with a pleasant history. Committing too early though sounds dangerous to both friendship and your marriage.

We did have one minor set back with Frank and Becky. Frank is willingly available to give us women some satisfaction when we call, either at our place or theirs, and Becky is happy it's happening. But on a Saturday evening group play situation, she went beyond merely exposing herself to us and performed oral on David and Red; Red to completion, swallowing. Frank was upset, Becky was more upset. Things were tense and although we went on with our play, they remained tense. They must have sorted it out, however, the next Wednesday they asked to both come over and before we women started to play Becky did oral on Red, David while Frank watched. Toward the end Becky ate out all three of us girls' sloppy pussies.

The three of us women in the family are bi and into the others. And that's fine as far as it goes, but sometimes a woman wants a man and his particular parts in her even if another woman is paying attention to her. They actually supplement on another pretty well.

This past weekend was the greatest. Not only did Frank come over and Becky (who doesn't play, see above) came as well to watch the children, but also Walter (Lora's ex-husband) was visiting the city nearby and we invited him. (When in our earlier poly family incarnation of 2 guys/2 women, we used to swing with Lora and Walter when they were married; after they split and Lora moved in with us, we sometimes invite Walter to play.) So for two days this weekend we three girls had four guys to satify us! In our usual family situation, two of us girls gets one good session from a guy, the third girl gets second efforts from them, then we're left still wanting, trying to suck up flaccid dicks to interest and hardness again. But with Frank and Walter there, there was a guy for every girl with one left over, and the competition got David's and Red's interest going again much faster. I've been with five guys in my life and four of them were with me (and in me) this weekend. Nice.

Not much time, so a quick update; more if anyone asks. Clair has found the solution to our (the three women's) desire for more sex (male sex) than hubby and Red have been giving us. Since Clair is the only one of the adults in the family that is a stay-at-home parent, she has the opportunity to interact with other moms. One woman ("Becky") confided in her that she has totally lost interest in sex and feels sorry for her husband ("Frank") because she only occasionally and reluctantly gives in and puts out. Over the weeks and more with discussion (actually, Clair is a skilled listener), Becky said she wished her husband could find someone she felt comfortable with who would give her husband unattached sex. Clair slowly revealed some of who we are and our family to see how she would react. Becky was open minded and accepting of how such a thing could work. We all got together socially a number of times, then after a discussion among our family the question was posed to Becky whether she would consider Clair, Lora and me suitable partners for Frank. Long story short, it has all worked out. We feared that Becky would have regrets once the sex began, but she is very positive. She comes over to our place with him sometimes or is at home when one of us women visits their place. Frank, of course, is quite happy and has been persuaded to engage in some group activity with us as well. Goes to show, there's a solution for just about every problem.

From another thread on gangbangs: Hi, this is Petra just bitching and making unreasonable demands on life. Were not looking for gangbangs, but this might be the right direction for us. We like the intimacy and safety of a closed group, and the ability to go bareback. It was fun when Walter played with us before Lora professed her undying love for hubby, divorced Walter and joined our family. It seems odd to me, now that I have two children and think I'm done reproducing, that my sex drive and desire to have sex with other men is higher than ever. (More children in our family would be ok, both Lora and Clair want one more.) In any event, Lora and Clair have the same increased desire for more sex with men. The problem with other couples is that another woman is included and that would place demands on the male resources we already have. What we girls would like is a guy or two or three that we could meet at lunch, on the way home, or for a quick weekend diversion. What are the chances that there are married women or committed couples out there that would be interested in some good-looking early 30s women to satisfy their man? We could be the third to a couple, since we're bi, but that involves more alignment of chemistry. Who knows? Writing this makes me have to find one of the guys I already have.

Thanks for your suggestions. Don't worry, we remind the guys every day how lucky they are to have us in their lives. But we recognize as well our good fortune in having two really hard-working, intelligent guys to father our children and take good care of us. And we recognize that as just part of human nature and human history, it was usually men that had plural marriages, not the women. We women are lucky to have men that unjealously allow us to seek love and sex between the two of them. Lora and I spoke to hubby and Red about how us girls would like/need more sexual attention. They know all three of us are multi-orgasmic, and while in the past they could go two or three times in a session, especially when switching to another woman, it's now sort of one-and-done. They'll do oral on us, but hell, we can do that ourselves. One of the things we've agreed to is once again set aside Saturday nights for sex with the guys and two of the women (the third can watch the children). Our past Saturday evenings reserved for sexual play were some of the best, crazy sex, loving nights we ever had among the three (Red, hubby & me), four (when Clair came along), and five (when Lora joined our group) we've ever had. The guys agreed to cut back on the gym/track on Friday and none on Saturday. During the week they will be more conscientious. In theory the women having one or more new men to share would be great and acceptable to the guys, but finding someone who meets all of our requirements (whatever those are) and be safe, safe, safe would be hard.

Wu and I are fully vaccinated but!!! The jury is still out on the variants, darned virus wants to survive and reproduce!