Leaderboard

Working fine now, might have just been a short down for maintenance outage. Getting a site back up and running usually isn't the end of it, there's often one or more short downtimes after that to do this or that to get back to full 100%.

I got a text response but I needed more so I called her. She claims she told me about her friend when we met, something I don’t remember if she did 2 years ago. She said she had a friend who went to my gym, again I don’t remember. I asked why didn’t she and her husband play with her friend and she said she tried alone and it didn’t work out. Her friend, the one at my gym, couldn’t do it. We then got into a discussion about turning 50 and changes we go through and the pandemic and what we have been doing. I told her we keep our private life private and I hate that too many people know what we do and she apologized and said she should have reached out not knowing both me and her friend would be at the gym at the same time. She swore nobody was stalking me, she thinks her friend just built up her nerve to approach me. Then she thanked me for being so nice when we met knowing how scared she was. Alan suggested I talk to the gym friend.

We would not tell anyone that other people are in the lifestyle or even nudism without the other people’s express consent. It’s not a matter of helping. It’s about privacy. One of our nude beach buddies (female) was on a bowling team with one of my wife’s co-workers (male). Our buddy let it slip that she hangs out with my wife at the nude beach. She called my wife immediately and apologized profusely. We did believe it was accidental. Everyone survived. The co-worker never said anything to my wife or anyone else as far as we know. I am sure our buddy was mortified and told him to forget she said it.

What is the story?

Huh? You know us? Think you might be right about things not changing since school.

At some point you just have to accept the place you're at and not worry about finding out exactly how you got there. And I have to agree, at some point real life is just an extension of high school. Be seeing you.

One question to ask yourself is: Did they do this to "help me" or "hurt me"? I would frame my response accordingly. Of course, they should have checked with you and asked permission before sharing your business. But, they did it with people in the lifestyle in what seems to be an attempt to facilitate connection not to hurt you... Given that, I'd temper my anger.

Haven’t heard back yet. I am a little upset that we were outed in our own area and wasn’t told that I was going to ambushed at the gym. Alan is making lemonade out of this saying we should be flattered that she searched us out. He is say so what if the couple enjoyed what we do and sent us a couple that is looking for a caring couple to guide them, that is what we did for them.

Do tell - what did they say?

She recognized you from the swinger site and made-up the story about the other couple - or possibly had a casual/virtual contact with them on the site and noticed that you two verified each other...something like that. That's my guess.

I was raised in a very conservative Christian family myself so I have an inkling as to what she is going through as well. Best defense for Christians is a good offense: I've posted this before (heck, I may have posted this earlier in this thread) but for other Christians having issues with swinging and religion, first remember that the Old Testament had almost every marriage being between multiple people and it wasn't 'condemned', it wasn't even said to be wrong. It was almost needed to provide the labor for farming or herding. It just kind of faded away as more people moved into cities instead of needing the help being nomads/farmers/herders. But just because having multiple wives came to an end, it didn't mean that monogamy was the only accepted 'norm'. In Roman times, just because you were married, didn't mean you never had sex with anyone else. People 'think' that the Bible condemns most sexual activity, but in actuality it doesn't, and the Romans had plenty: bath houses, legal prostitution, orgies, gladiators (not just for fighting in the arena), homosexuality, sex with slaves, and more were all considered legal, allowable, and not a violation of the marriage. Next, read this: Monogamy Isn't Biblical, It's Roman Finally, remember search (hidden in upper right corner) is your friend. There are a bunch of threads dealing with Christianity and swinging. Here's a good book on the topic: "Unprotected Texts: The Bible's Surprising Contradictions about Sex and Desire" by Jennifer Wrigtht Knust This ought to at least give you some ammo to start the conversation rolling. Let us know how things progress!