Leaderboard

You can’t imagine how liberating and how much of a positive mental health change it can be to free yourself from an unhappy bond with someone! It is never too late to start your life over and end it in a happy place. I know you must feel like you have been attacked in this thread OP, but I am guessing you are probably hearing from a lot of people that have been in the same kind of unhappy relationship and have moved past it with great results. Myself included. I never realized how amazing my life would be without living a lie. If I died tomorrow I would die happy. All the luck to you whatever you decide to do moving forward! Do what is best for you, not everybody else. You deserve that and have done your duties to your family and your husband. Good people get divorced too.

Well, you lived the fantasy you wanted. Given your reaction to seeing how enthused she was, I would highly recommend not living it out again. She said "she is happy to try FFM, but has no desire to watch me fuck another woman". That seems like she's playing both sides of the issue. What would she do while you and the other woman are having sex? The only way I'd even consider another encounter is a MFMF couple swap. This way you'll get attention and she'll get attention. However, the language and tone of your post seems to hint that your relationship needs spark. Thus, I would take her out on a few dates (get a babysitter), start experimenting at home (e.g. toys, blindfolds, etc). If she was enthused about the new cock, she may get enthused about new experiences with you....i.e. get off the couch. Go to the backyard. Drive around the corner and jump in the backseat. Using another woman, man or couple to spark things up won't help the two of you alone.

I often write about our first swap with a couple and my night alone with him. The next day I had a very uncomfortable bi experience, something I never wanted to do. I never had any sexual attraction to women and certainly had never planned to explore. As it was our first swing I just went along not wanting to ruin my experience from the night before. Over the years since that first time I have had contact with bi sex in very small doses. Normally it was done as part of another playtime thing. I became less afraid of being with a woman, still not giving totally to being bi. Our friend who we met on vacation years ago, our first and primary play partner was coming to NYC on business and said she was going to have free time and wanted to meet in the city for a Girl’s Day. She was on business and finished early and the weather was perfect. I agreed to meeting, we had become very good friends and I never spent time with her without our husbands. She booked a Mani/Pedi and massages for both of us. Her treat. Lunch outdoors in great restaurant, walking and talking. I always wondered if we were their first, I told her they were too relaxed that first time, she swore we were, they had agreed before the cruise that they would approach a couple. I told her how often I think about that night and how romantic her husband was. She told me they have played with others and she always thinks about her first also. A beautiful day, we had drinks at a rooftop bar and talked and talked. She mentioned that her hotel was great and invited me to stay the night. She read my body language as not being onboard, and said we would be alone, no putting on a show for the men. Give it a try, I could always leave. After big hesitant minutes, I gave into lust. My friend is a beautiful person, as romantic as her husband. With my inhibitions taken away, we made love for hours. Made love to a woman for our own benefit not for men watching us. I still don’t think I am bisexual, it was a magical day.

After thinking about this some, it's looking like the rules, at least for you, haven't changed at all. The most secure prison is the one we make for ourselves. Been here, done that.

She will come up to me, start making out and reach down and grab my crotch or if I am standing she will come up arch her back and start rubbing her sexy ass on my crotch, because she knows it will get me going quickly. It is never really subtle around our place.

She says do you want to have sex. Or I do. No one said no yet.

TBH I think many of us have had this experience / feeling too. I also did...I was thrilled to see my SO having a great time with a friend who was horny as hell after going through a divorce. It just kind of happened and it was so hot I too could not wait for her to take his cock. I started the day after focusing on parts of the MFM especially the latter part when he was about to cum, he pulls out and she grabs his cock and puts it back in as he is ready to cum she yells at him to fuck her harder... and to put his seed in her. I was like ..umm.... this was not expected. Then when he finished he pulls out, cock dripping, he takes her head and tells her to clean him up and she does. She does... Don´t focus too much on it. Try to enjoy what you saw...don´t compare either.

That's what my husband said. Oh well, we'll figure this out.?

The other side of the coin suggests that they haven't been getting many new members for the last (covid) year, just like most every other business. We're lifers so either they come back or they don't, we'll still be there or we won't. If there was a better option in our area, we would have gone there to start with, but there isn't. I'm hoping that they get whatever it is straightened out (and that they aren't screwing up their site by trying to add more of the stupid, worthless 'improvements' that they have been adding of late).

It's kind of disheartening the number of responses that are essentially telling the OP that his feelings are irrelevant, and that the ONLY consideration is whether she's happy. If this had been a woman posting about the a husband that wasn't a very attentive lover and was far more into other women, the streets would be flooded with compassion and the husband would be universally branded as a bad person. While not entirely surprising, this lack of compassion and blaming is sad.

I'd say that the kinky stuff needs to be on hold until the rest of the relationship is solid. Sex is great and all. But no matter how great, getting the relationship right is more important.