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First of all welcome to the site! It is completely normal for you to have the wants and feelings you do. You are human after all. The thing is nobody here is going to have the answers you seek, because everyone is different and has their own unique relationships. Really the first thing you should do is sit down with your partner and have a real conversation about your wants and his without judgement from either of you. Not well you are going at it in the bedroom either. That is the first step in exploring the lifestyle. If you can’t get by that step it will be very hard to get to the next step without issues coming up. Communication is the most important thing in all regards when it comes to expanding your relationship. Good luck on your journey.

Yeah, we stopped going to Mexico a few years ago. As beautiful as some areas are, it just isn't worth the risk. The once "safe areas" aren't necessarily so any longer.

We were all first timers at one point. Though we tread lightly to avoid the potential drama.

Hi out there. I’m married and in an evolving relationship. Last year I did a burlesque photo shoot for him as a gift. He loved the way it turned out but asked if I’d be willing to do something more risqué in the future. I got a reference from the original photographer (female) and told my husband the new photographer would be a male. Being the protective husband he is we both requested a meeting over a cup of coffee. We met which was great and made things all the more comfortable. I loved what I saw from his book and my husband did as well. We had the shoot and the pictures came out great. He got really turned on by knowing another guy was doing the pictures. I was shocked. I asked him if he’d consider doing a couples shoot with me and he said he’d try but was reluctant. Pretty soon after he agreed and we were off again. Prior to the shoot my husband and the photographer talked about his career. My husband, who’s faithful, shocked me a bit with his envy and open talk about what the photographer experienced. I’m extremely open and joined in the conversation. Both of us felt like we were conversing with someone we really liked and knew a lot longer than we actually did. Unfortunately my husband had difficulties getting hard which is completely out of the ordinary. The photographer said it happened a lot and just to relax. Surprisingly at my husband's request he asked for me to do a POV shoot the photographer showed us in his book. Basically it’s the photographer including himself in various ways while taking the pictures. As we started taking the pictures I liked being touched by the photographer even though it wasn’t active foreplay or sex. It really was strictly for the pictures themselves. During the pictures my husband quickly got hard and watched. Eventually the photographer asked him if he was going to get involved. The rest of the shoot went as we planned. Afterwards we all sat around and talked and went through the pictures. Some time passed again and we talked a lot about the fun we had with it. My husband admitted he liked watching the photographer touch me and if not for that he may have been to nervous to get hard. I really want this to develop further but I’m apprehensive because it’s a major change in life obviously. I’m also not sure about how I feel about seeing him with someone else. When I say I’m not sure I mean most likely not. I don’t even really think he wants to. I almost feel like if I bring that up it will be too much too fast. Multiple times when having sex we’ve dirty talked about me doing another shoot and giving myself up. I’d feel more comfortable to actually do it than talk about it. I feel like my husband has opened a door that I want to walk into. Am I reading it wrong? Is it best for me to just set something else up and let it work itself the way it will? Based on our interactions I have no doubt the photographer would be into it also. Would I be going to far given our relationship if I reached out to the him and told him how I feel, how my husband feels, and confirm he’d say yes?

The post about being with newbies brought back our memory of our first and was wondering how most others found their first and whether they were experienced. I know memories fade though most of us can recall our firsts. Our adventures began with Alan saying he missed out on my wild days, he never experienced watching two women having sex. After a lot of talk, and I mean A LOT of talk, we registered on a swinger site. I know I have related this before, plenty of fakes, plenty of no shows, we finally decided to meet a couple, not a unicorn. It took much more discussion to make sure Alan was going to accept that I would not only be with a woman, most likely sex with me and another man. We agreed we would see how it would go. The question I am posing, why that couple? For us we received a message from a couple, just like we had before. We normally discounted pictures, always of the woman, this time we got pictures of the couple, dressed. They were younger than us and very attractive, the big negative was they weren’t married or living together. We replied with a very current picture, letting them know we were older than them. Next picture of them was a totally nude picture. It would be a lie if we say looks don’t matter, they more than fit any doubt on looks. She had a perfect body and he was handsome. I need to add he was well endowed, not that I noticed lol. Were they the best choice? No. Was it the greatest sex? No Did we break the ice? Yes.

My sister has lived her entire adult life in Mexico, the last 40 years outside Guadalajara. Security was never great by US standards and over the past decade it’s become quite dangerous in the countryside outside major cities. The very wealthy maintain heavily-armed private security and kidnapping gangs learned that looking for the big score by kidnapping rich people often ended very badly for the kidnappers and their formerly living families. So the gangs turned to the sort of upper-middle-class families who can take the peso equivalent of a few thousand dollars out of the bank. The whole deal goes down in a few hours. Because they don’t have private security — a few years ago my brother-in-law got shot by robbers at the business he owns — my sister and her family no longer travel between cities by car. Now they fly commercial. That said, I agree with other posters on this thread that American tourists staying at international-oriented resorts have little reason to be concerned about their security. And I would include the airport to resort transfers. Tourism is important to the economy and most of the resorts are owned by powerful interests. There’s no percentage in robbing or kidnapping foreign tourists, few of whom have much cash on them or easy access to ransom money . All that would accomplish would be to bring down the heat. Bad for business.

We are willing to meet any couple that we feel we might have a connection with, but we are just a bit more careful with beginners. Once we find out that they are both on board and willing, we're usually good. Too often, that first meeting involves the woman 'just doing this once to make him happy', the woman having NO IDEA why we're meeting, the woman not being able to make it, or the woman being imaginary. That's why we never play on the first meeting.

If you decide to skip the vaccine that’s obviously entirely your choice. But given we are all taking the vaccine to not only protect ourselves, but the whole of society (especially the vulnerable) I would encourage everyone to take it. Also, this page kasualapp.com/dating-during-the-coronavirus/ explain why Covid surge the online dating.

Why that first couple? Because the woman knocked on our door in the semi-private room we were enjoying at the swing club and asked if she could join. Then just dove right in between my wife's legs. Her man followed a few minutes later. Couldn't even tell you their names.

We really lucked out. Our first couple were people Mrs. E knew, used to babysit for. She renewed the long-distance friendship with the wife years after they'd moved to Las Vegas. One way or another, it came up in conversation, the friend managed to discern that we were curious, and dropped hints that they were already open and had another couple. I'd always wanted us to experiment with strangers for simplicity, but if it hadn't been for a wife she trusted and a familiar male she'd already fantasized about once or twice in the past, we'd have probably never gotten started, and we got to start with two couples who already worked well together. It went so smoothly we went from soft swap by their pool to full swap in our hotel room in 24 hours.