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40ish? You have plenty of time. We were together as a couple almost that long before we seriously considered it. Career , children , aging parents that required care, all had higher priority. We have no regrets about playing our life as it was dealt, "to every thing there is a season and a time to every purpose". The trick is recognizing it. I will again recommend the well written and insightful books available. You asked about the rightness and normalcy of this all. While I cannot agree wholeheartedly with the entire contents of these books, they do help form the questions in ways you may not be considering. I will volunteer, " The Ethical Slut" as one book.

A theme I'm sure you've seen by now in many, many posts is that the key to successful swinging is communication. Communicate, communicate, communicate. It sounds like you're doing a great job of that! Even if you never end up swinging, that kind of open, honest communication is the bedrock of many a great relationship.

An open mind is a requirement. Even though you’re not religious or have moral issues, the societal programming did its job. It’s good that you’re checking it out for yourself, but like others have said, it’s not for everyone. At least you’re giving it a fair shake by researching the topic though.

Not all cuckolds perform m/m play. And, bisexual m/m play has little to do with cuckolding. Seems like a stretch to conflate the two topics. There is enough confusion of terms as it is… The Venn diagram has overlap- leave it at that.

If there is a line between bisexual and cuckold it's a blurry line at best. A cuckold husband may suck a Bull's cock as an act if submission and symbolic transfer of power from husband to wife, but he wouldn't do any of it if he didn't like sucking cock. Yes, men can be every bit the sexual shapeshifter that women can be. And, for us, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. This LS is about exploring your sexuality- so explore!

I'll offer a thought. The cuckold thing isn't my particular thing, but the submissive I've been working with sometimes experiences a cuckquean-like kink. She has an older female friend who she looks up to as sort of a mother figure, and let it slip that she's developed a terribly clear fantasy of me fucking that woman and making her watch - and then making her clean the woman up. It's not an explicitly bisexual thing for her, it's a submission thing, the logical end game of the scenario to grind her down as hard as possible.

It’s tough to say if this is bi exploration or fully engaging a cuckold fetish/fantasy. Personally believe it’s more the latter. Although it straddles the line and is probably different and depends on the individual participating.

I would certainly hope not. We've got enough people in the world these days trying to rewrite dictionaries to meet their own agenda - hope and pray it does not come to the LS community. Our take on this is simple - we believe in total truth in advertising. I hear the stigma thing, but don't buy it. Common now - there is stigma associated with everything in the LS in the non-LS world. I thought one of the more appealing aspects of the LS was honesty. We know what we are, and advertise as much. People who read our profiles know what to expect, and we expect the same from others. If readers don't like what they see, then they know we're not a great match and move on - a win-win solution IMHO. Anyone who does not have the balls to admit and be truthful about why they are here and what they are looking for should probably not be in the LS to begin with. Sorry for being so brutal - we're not trying to hurt anyone's feelings but feel rather strongly about being able to openly communicate about who we are and what others are looking and expecting.

I think cuckhold is different than Bi. He is Bi for us, and we both love the MM play. He also likes to see me fuck other men. We love to share a cock. Any other man engaged in humiliation would be booted.

In terms of why hide it, while I think things have gotten way better on acceptance in the swinging world, there is still a lot of stigma involved with male-male interaction. Or fear of stigma at the very least. I also think there are gender differences, not just in swinging but society at large. A female can admit to girl-girl experience, and "lesbian" isn't the first word on everybody's tongues. A guy admitting to male-male, for some people "gay male" is the first thing that comes to their mind. Don't know why that is, but it is. For some reason, more leeway is given on a female's sexual identity, whereas with males it's perceived to be an all or nothing thing. So question back to you. I have watched some amateur cuckold porn, and it seems like creampie cleaning is much more common that sucking cock. Why is that? Is it that licking a cum-filled pussy is still licking a pussy, therefore still "not gay", but sucking a cock is definitely in gay territory?

Here are a couple more of Missus Enhancer in her new green outfit! Getting ready for Christmas.

Main stream swinging is an oxymoron. Swinging is not main stream. Within swinging there are diverse interests. Bisexuality by both genders, BDSM, hot wifing, vixen/stag, dom/sub. Many of these sub interests are currently of no interest to me, but if I am open minded enough to participate in the lifestyle, I owe it to participants in these subgroups to be tolerant and supportive of their interests and not denigrate them.

Congratulations! You have clearly described a common pathway in the LS. From the outside looking in (aka vanillas, interesteds, just about to dip the toe, breathless reporters,.. )the LS is all about sex. That's what is talked about, envied, disparaged, ... From the inside looking out, the LS is all about your primary relationship with your spouse or S/O, and how that journey unfolds. For a few in the LS, it really is "all about sex". For many others, it is about building relationships with like-minded couples. The friendship piece really does matter. Trust, intimacy, honesty in a space where no one is embarrassed to be having fun\. Compare that to the issues of ordinary life.