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My girlfriend and I had our first swap with another couple at a club last weekend. We were both very nervous although we had fun for sure. We did not know the other couple before hand although got along well in the club. My girlfriend made out with the other girl on the dance floor which was very sexy to watch. We ended up with full swap beside each other on a bed. I got nerves so could not get it up. I did get a blowjob from the other girl which resulted in a quick and short orgasm - not my usual. So I got first time nerves. May have also been due to some alcohol and we had had quite bit of sex at home in the days prior as we were both quite excited. I watched her with the other guy and found it very exciting, also intimidating and experienced some very anxious feelings which I guess is normal. She did not have an orgasm as she was nervous also and had a few drinks for her nerves. We talked a little later. She feels the full swap was fun and is open to doing it again. She doesn't seem very willing to talk much otherwise though and I do feel that need. She did say she might need some time to process. I am having some intrusive thoughts about seeing her with another and realized I am being somewhat possessive and a little insecure around this. Again, not my usual. I am not cocky generally just not usually jealous or down on myself. I realize that I loved this experience and this type of thing is for sure for me. I love my girlfriend very much and really want us to work. We are 4 years in to our relationship and get along really well. We are very close, live together and are best friends. She is not as much of a talker as me though and sometimes that frustrates me - like now. Hence me being on this chat. I am ok with her reticence to talk and I believe her when she says we are fine and that she really doesn't feel that much has changed. I want to get past these feelings so we can have fun without the anxiety I am feeling. I have read and will follow the usual advice for males - minimize alcohol, not too much sex in the days before we play with others again, and I will use a pill the next time as insurance. Our sex since has been a bit spicier and her orgasms seem stronger, so I think this has given us a boost. I could use some advice about how to navigate the next steps.

Propose marriage to her.

Questions for the ladies and would like to hear the men respond also. 1. Would you or have you had your man cum on your tits then lick the cum off your tits? 2. Would you like your swinger partner to cum on your tits then watch your man lick his cum off your tits? My wife loves me to cum on her tits then lick the cum off her tits and she loves me to cum in her mouth then kiss me. We both find this a big turn on.

We have met many couples that are looking for their first swinging experience. Many couples go to a club, first watch then decide if they want to take the next step with a people they just briefly met. I’ve been told some just advance with no conversation at clubs. We meet people and always suggest we talk over dinner or drinks to make sure they want what they think they want. I know these pre sex meetings can sound like interviews. Some background of what brought them to want to have sex with others. It’s funny that one can be more open to strangers than to each other. We always talk about what started us. You are not the first man who got nervous and didn’t preform the way your usual way. Our first was supposed to be for me and the other woman to have sex in front of my husband. It ended up that in addition to choosing a woman, her partner was well endowed. I normally wouldn’t care about his size, the picture they sent us was very obvious. It was our first time so his bragging we felt was something we dealt with. Why am I telling you this? He went as quickly as you did. It happens. Men can still orgasm without erections as you experienced, and when it happens I am happy that I could make it happen. On the other side women can enjoy sex without orgasm. Not every woman will orgasm every time, and I know women who claim they never had an orgasm. We like to have a talk after sex with our new friends. We encourage them to talk about feelings and sort of give them homework of privately having the talk. Both of you need to be sure, no pushing the other into doing things outside of you comfort zone. Good luck going forward.

Something that I appreciated about hubby early on, even before David and I married, and still do, is that if I want to talk about it (the physical sex or my feelings) he will listen attentively and give me his thoughts. If there was something that I wanted to keep to myself that was fine as well. Hubby is neither one of those guys who needs to hear every detail, nor wants me to keep my activities from him. It's up to me.

The object of the game is to be sexually satisfied by whatever excites the members of the group and nothing more but the lack of acceptance is terribly hypocritical. My best friend is gay and he's constantly hammered by "straight" married guys to have sex. That is no surprise but for a swingers group to be so close minded is disappointing.

40ish? You have plenty of time. We were together as a couple almost that long before we seriously considered it. Career , children , aging parents that required care, all had higher priority. We have no regrets about playing our life as it was dealt, "to every thing there is a season and a time to every purpose". The trick is recognizing it. I will again recommend the well written and insightful books available. You asked about the rightness and normalcy of this all. While I cannot agree wholeheartedly with the entire contents of these books, they do help form the questions in ways you may not be considering. I will volunteer, " The Ethical Slut" as one book.

If I may say so, I think it's very positive that you seem to be getting a handle on what does and doesn't work for you. I wanted to toss out another bit of advice (which you may seen in other posts but just in case). As you continue to talk, remember there is a big difference between what sounds really great when you're all hot and naked and having sex, and what sounds like a good idea when things are calm and clear. Lots of people find the fantasy of a thing really hot but when they think about it in the clear light of day, they could never do it. So, when your talking about swinging and considering actually doing it, focus on how you feel about it when you're dressed and sitting down to breakfast, not when you're all hot and bothered and climbing into bed.

Yes, but... There is only more with your sex life as a couple, which can be greater than the sum of the two parts. Individually, if you both are already happy with your individual sex lives, I don't think you are going to find swinging changes that much. Nor should it. But as a couple, I think you will find it supercharges your sex life as the compersion thing kicks in and her sexual happiness becomes part of you on top of your individual happiness and satisfaction, and same for her with you. I'm going to quibble... I don't think there is "more." I think there is "other." My wife and I are happy. We enjoy sex together. We have fun together. As cplnuswing says later, we know each other and we know what works for each other. What's more, because we communicate well, when we want to explore something new (in the bedroom or out) we are pretty willing to discuss it. What swinging brings to us is new and different opportunities. It isn't more. It isn't better (A lot of new people post the question "what do I do if the other person my partner is with is better/bigger/hotter/whatever than me?"). It's just different. Part of it is new experiences. My wife and I have both picked up some new tricks from swinging partners that we wouldn't have known we enjoyed if we hadn't encountered them. Part of it is things you just physically can't do with only two people. However, as I said, I would never call any of it "more." We actually haven't been able able to swing since we moved several years ago. While we both miss the fun of it, our sex lives are still plenty satisfying without it.

A theme I'm sure you've seen by now in many, many posts is that the key to successful swinging is communication. Communicate, communicate, communicate. It sounds like you're doing a great job of that! Even if you never end up swinging, that kind of open, honest communication is the bedrock of many a great relationship.

WE read so many posts last night. Some questions brought up more questions. Questions brought up conversation, conversation lead to SEX. Not a bad thing. Debbie asked me if I would watch, do I want to watch, would I enjoy watching, would I watch if it was our friend or better with a stranger. Good questions. She additionally asked if I think our lady friend is attractive, would I pick her up if she was in a singles bar and we were all single. She asked me if ever thought of her friend sexually before. Last night I sure did all night. I blocked out the thought of our male friend and Debbie and undressed in my mind the girlfriend. In my mind YEAH I would do it. Can I? Read a lot about sex with friends, pros and cons. I could go bad, more for us, less for them. They are already swingers. We read a thread that it’s better with people you know and like, and we read do we lose friends if it goes bad. We are still dealing with the can we question. Do we want to question. The more we talk the more curious we become. We found a recent article in a newsfeed, Is Monogamous Sex, Monotonous Sex. I never thought it monotonous but is it? Do we have the same sex every time, do we change it up? We have been monogamous since we became committed. She never complained about our sex, I’m happy, is there more? Debbie’s question if I would watch and enjoy, I asked her if she could watch. She said she would if I wanted. More talk, more questions, more answers, more excitement, more doubt, more reassurance. We decided that to the moment we can change our minds.

An open mind is a requirement. Even though you’re not religious or have moral issues, the societal programming did its job. It’s good that you’re checking it out for yourself, but like others have said, it’s not for everyone. At least you’re giving it a fair shake by researching the topic though.

I think cuckhold is different than Bi. He is Bi for us, and we both love the MM play. He also likes to see me fuck other men. We love to share a cock. Any other man engaged in humiliation would be booted.

1. The cowgirl and reverse cowgirl are the easiest for the logistics. It accomodates people of different heights better than standing positions. 2. Once the woman warms up, it probably won't make much difference who is sticking their cock where, unless one of them is quite large. 3. Inevitably, there will be incidental M/M contact. That doesn't make you gay. Remember, it's not gay if it's a three-way.

In the net at the front of a large catamaran while on vacation at Hedo II in Jamaica. There was a large audience of naked people watching us. Someone was nice enough to give us a copy of their video of the event after we returned home.

In a public park one morning with 3 guys watching. Couldn't let them just stand there with hard-ons so I let them do me after hubby got done. Wow!!!!

Hubby & I have 2 spots! One was driving down a busy road, huddy drove & I "rode!" The other was when we were on our way home, could wait till we got home. The car we were driving then was way to small, Mustang GT, so we pulled over into a sports complex parking lot. I got up on the hood of our 'Stang & we went at it. It was awesome!

On the back of my husbands caddy, in the middle of Texas, in the middle of the night, where we pulled off of the interstate, because we were so turned on by each other!

In a coat closet at a Catholic Church in the small town I grew up in. Yes, I already know I'm going to hell.

In the middle of nowhere in Oregon we have visited a vista point. I have fucked my dearest in doggy when a car stopped. A couple said hello and doing the same like we. Watching each other we have had a great time. Afterwards we have changed partners have had indeed great fun and said goodbye. So we have had two wonderful experiences.

Me and my wife are always looking for new places to enjoy each other. This year would have to be the end zone in the Horseshoe at Ohio State. It was early May on Sunday afternoon. Just me, her and her girlfriend on lookout. and it was great. She had done her hair up in pigtails and was dress as a OSU cheerleader under her coat. I had on a long football jersey that came nearly to my knees and nothing else! Just my coat and my shoes. We put our coats on the ground so we wouldn't get dirty and I fucked her doggie style right there on the Buckeyes emblem. It was cold, and wet and our cloths still got dirty, but the sex was fucking hot! We love to role play and the football player/cheerleader bit was the best one yet.