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Wife86, I'm sorry the night turned out so poorly. There are potential explanations for your husband's reaction, but it's hard to know what's going on without being able to speak with him. You're facing the same hurdle of course. Wild guesses; your husband didn't expect you to have as good of a time as you did. He might feel like he's lost something with you, and doesn't feel like he can ever please you again the way you were. There might be some deep seated jealousy exposed within himself that even he didn't know about beforehand. It might be that now that he's seen you having sex with someone else, he can't unsee it..and it keeps flashing back in his mind, like a small form of PTSD. I would strongly consider counseling to help work through this. He might not want to go, but at least have him go with you. This has to be talked out. It might take time, even a lot of time, but patience is key. For some people, swinging is just something that can not work. That's ok. It doesn't make him broken, or somehow less. Get back to being just the two of you, and stay with that. That doesn't mean we don't welcome you here to talk with us! Please do. If you have questions, we'll try our best to answer and help you through.

I'm curious how your relationship was prior to this. You don't have to divulge anything, I'm just typing while I think about your post. His reaction is on the severe side of reactions I've seen and heard about. Were you two married young (i.e. he didn't have much experience with others, you didn't have experience with others)? Does he lack self confidence in general? Are you more outgoing in general? How long have you been married? Ages? I understand his reaction, just not to this extreme. When I was in my early-mid 20's, I likely would have reacted to seeing my SO with someone else in a similar way (I had little confidence in myself, had little sexual experience, SO had one other partner, etc). I would have never agreed to a swap. Had I watched her reaction to another man, one with larger equipment, I would have cowered in shame. I had no confidence in myself and seeing that would have just crushed me. I feel for your husband. Like the others, I'm confused why he would have agreed to a swap. This extreme reaction doesn't sound like it came out of nowhere. This situation needs time and professional help. I think you both should see a counselor separately and then together. This way he can speak freely alone, the counselor would know your perspective while hearing his concerns and together you can build a bridge. I don't see any further swinging in your future.

It's interesting. I discussed this with my wife again, noting the existence of the kids in the mix. Her opinion hasn't changed. She doesn't think there's a particular problem in doing this. She and I disagree. One of the many reasons I love her She has her own mind. I'm glad we've all here given you something to think about. I love this forum in part because it is a very helpful bunch of people who will tell you what we think, even if it's not what you think you need/want to hear. So I did a search using swinglifestyle.com. I've no idea any particulars of you and your wife, except that the kids are old enough to be on their own and your 3-4 hours away from Dallas. So, I did a search based on Rotan, TX (79546 zip code), within 100 miles, single men age 40-50 interested in full swap, and are full paid members. The search result returned 30 potential single men. I think out of such a set you should be able to find 4-5 men who are truly good, and good matches for your wife (and you). Wherever you are, I think you can find single males who will fit the bill, and will be patient with your wife getting to know him before hopping in bed.

There are counselors who have experience in ethical non monogamy (ENM) who can be of particular help. Some traditional counselor may balk and perhaps be too judgemental of the swinging topic.

I have written about this at length in other threads: Far too many couples decide to jump into the lifestyle without having soberly considered both the potential upsides and downsides. Swinging is not a good fit for most marriages and far more marriages have been ruined by having sex outside of the relationship than have been helped. This should be the starting point of any serious discussion about swinging. A couple should know they are rolling the dice and considering an activity that is, by definition, high risk--both to their relationship and to their physical and emotional health. And far too many people in the lifestyle act as proselytizers trying to convert people to the lifestyle. This is extremely misguided if not borderline unconscionable. It is unfortunate the OPs are having such a difficult time. We encourage them to seek out professional help immediately. This is not the kind of thing that a couple can ordinarily resolve on their own. And the longer it goes on unresolved, the more damage is being done. Wishing them the best of luck.

We had three couples over for the weekend – wahoooo! It was a fun naked weekend. We have this amazing upper sun room on the east side of the house that no one can see into, or so we thought. A new young couple moved in about 7 months ago. They are a fun couple and I’ve become good friends with the wife. She is how I found out about their attic window. Her husband discovered it Saturday while up cleaning an area for a writing area. He is an amateur writer. After taking off all the weather insulation, cleaning it, oiling the tracks, the window opens. You can see and hear everything going on in our so called private sun room. So this is how she discovered her husband is very interested in bisex. All of us had been going at it since Friday. We wives were taking a break encouraging the men to put on a show for us, which they did. Our neighbor saw it all. His wife climbed up to find him, penis in hand, watching and listening. She said they could hear all the sex talk as well as the groans. She was able to step up on a chair quietly enough to peer over him and see what all the commotion was about. She said she nearly fell. Her husband was jerking off to men sucking cock & F ing each other in the a**. She climbed down walking up behind him reaching around helping him as they listened to the sex. She moved them closer so she could watch with him asking/telling him, he liked this didn’t he. Then asked what he liked the best, the sucking, being sucked, F ing, or the getting F ed in the a** by a real cock? She told me the sucking cock and getting F ed in the a**. He came on their hands and all over his pants. She said they kissed and she went back down the ladder. She sat as he took his time coming down. Calmly they discussed it. It was new to her but not a shock; they play along these lines with strapons. She asked if he wanted to “go there?” He said that’d only ever happen is she was all on board, wanted it to happen, made it happen, it is not something he needed. Today she and I were out on our deck and she told me all. I was embarrassed, apologetic, and concerned. She as okay though didn’t know where to go from here. I asked her where she wanted to go; her husband had left it up to her. She told me she was going to have to investigate it more but at least she knew. She appeared collected.

He needs your love and support, obviously no swinging and a little professional counseling.

OK, I'll admit one of my fantasies is to eat my wife's pussy after another man has cum inside of her. I also wouldn't mind eating a cum filled pussy other than my wife's. I have had this fantasy for years, but have never had the chance to do it, mostly because my wife doesn't want me to and secondly because I haven't done it before and I have the "First Time Factor" syndrome....I guess I am a little reserved. I've asked my wife several times in the past before we play with another to let me come over after he has cum inside her and have me clean her up. She knows I want to suck her cum filled pussy. I've even considered eating her pussy after I cum in her, and a few times have come close but she gently pushes my head away. A few times I have brought myself just to climax then held back and cum a little in and on her pussy without her knowing and then went down on her and sucked her. So, how many people here, men and women like to have their pussies eaten after being fucked and like to eat cum filled pussies? I don't think I'm too weird. Maybe I am. I wish my wife would let me do it. I did have the opportunity once to suck my cum out of the female partner of a couple we were playing with, but I sort of chickened out....I think because it was all my cum. However I am sure if it was another man's cum I would have went right down and sucked her clean. What's others experiences? Yes or No? Good or Bad?

We attended the club a few weeks back and I was totally unaware of the conspiracy going on over me between a couple we have known for sometime, my wife and a woman that came as a guest with the couple. The evening started off as normal catching up with friends, stories and laughter. I met the friend, I’ll call her Pam, she was a quiet shy woman late fourties’ short dark hair very very thin. She seemed a bit nervous but over the next hour or so at the table we all talked and in time she relaxed and joined in. While I was talking about an up coming bike ride the ladies had been talking between themselves. Something was said, we didn’t hear, that made them laugh. Pam busted out with a loud belly laugh that obviously caught her off guard…she caught herself, hand over her mouth and we all laughed more at her shocked look. That broke any remaining ice on her part. As the evening progressed people were splitting off in pairs, threesomes, foursomes and moresomes. A typical club evening. That is when the wife of the couple and my wife approached me when Pam excused herself to the ladies room. M told me about Pam, how long they have known her. How they valued their long friendship and chose to not include sharing sex play but that Pam was very curious and interested. M said she wanted her friend to have a very good experience and wanted me to ask Pam to join me. She knew I would only do what she was willing to do and not push her into things she might not be ready for. M and my wife then gave me some back ground on Pam’s past let’s just say it wasn’t pleasant and her ex was a huge Ahole. so I guess while I was busy discussing bikes, rides and an upcoming holiday ride the ladies were telling Pam about me and building her confidence. Pam returned and we started talking her and I. Just natural conversation. M her husband and my wife left together for a room and Pam and I remained. In time I asked Pam she would like to join me in a room. She looked a bit startled and blushed quite a bit. I thought I had blown it. But Pam nodded her head yes. I stood and reach out for her hand. She took mine and I walked her down to a closed room with gentle lighting, a double bed and mirrored wall. I looked at her and smiled she quietly smiled back at me and stepped into the room……. with permission from Pam I will be writing a story of this adventure later. In conversation with Pam she later explained to me the conversation she had over weeks with M and her husband and later on the phone with M and my wife. Pam’s hesitation at first but later her agreement and later meeting that evening. Her nervousness. putting this all together it was my wife and friends conspiring to pimp me out. I am flattered of course…..and greatly happy meeting Pam. But my wife pimped me out…..lol damn.

This is pretty good advice given your response (below).

Swinging requires almost total trust in your partner. You need to reaffirm that while it was fun, it will never be as good as what the two of you have. Also, let him know that you don't want to do it again (not you won't do it again because he didn't enjoy it, but that you aren't interested in doing it again). In hind sight, you probably should have taken smaller steps, but it's too late for that now. Just keep letting him know that you love him and while it was something that you (both) wanted to try, it's over and done with. He is all that you need and want. Counseling would be a good thing if he is willing since there is probably more here than what any of us are seeing. Good luck and let us know how things are going.

Our marriage is fine we even thought about having kids this year something both me and him really wanted we are both 36 and met when we were 23 married at 25 so going on 11 years soon. I know his time all the way from high-school college was hard on him and he was a bit shy, but always kind which is why I ended up with him and why I find him attractive I have been with so many assholes. I also know he struggled with bullying and exclusion for many years and had a rough childhood but instead of being angry at the world he was just kind which is why I love him. He is not angry with me but I seemed to have triggered a past trauma in him that he seems reluctant to share he seems embarrased by it so I know there is more to this. And if that's the case I will do whatever it takes to help him get through it, it's painful for me to see him like this. I never meant for this to happen and I am not some evil person who wanted to break him.

You both go to counseling, as soon as possible! And do not feel embarrassed. Counselors have heard it all. And do not hesitate to shop around a bit for a counselor who you both feel comfortable with.

I’d suck her pussy until her head caves in, then fuck her into unconsciousness, and finally shoot a load on her tits. Happy now?

How exactly did you talk him into it? He’s a grown-up, isn’t he? He could have said “no” at any point prior to your physical encounter with this other couple … or even prior to meeting them. I agree with the other posters that you two need a lot of open, honest communication and maybe professional help. But you didn’t talk him into this … he LET HIMSELF be talked into it! Don’t take on all the guilt.

80eezcouple, I'm sorry you feel the way you do about the feedback here. I can tell you from direct personal experience there is no way that my wife and I would have gotten into swinging if it weren't for this board. The people here are very, very good. Sometimes what we have to say isn't what people want to hear. I'd much rather we say what we think needs to be said than to lead someone down the wrong path. This forum supports the swinger community. Because of that, it also means we tell it like it is as we see it. If we're wrong, we certainly invite correction.

I still say she's smoking hot!

I never thought about him getting sideways and maybe saying something to the kids. They are both grown and moved out but I would be devastated if they found out. This is seeming more and more like a ticking bomb the more we discuss. Thank you all for the information and upfront answers.

Let this sink in ladies… Whether you believe in abortion or not; you do not have autonomy over your own bodies. And, you will not have autonomy over your own bodies until you stand up. Many men will stand with you, but you must stand up. Shut this fucked-up country down if you need to; but be heard. You have the power to fix this.

If you're talking about her body it's two thumbs up! She's smoking hot!

We were in a threesum, I was sucking the other guys dick and my husband moved his face towards mine for a kiss, but I mistook it, and offered him the dick, pushing it towards his mouth and he took it. So we then made out with the dick between us and sucked him off together.

When my Hubby and I are in full animal-mode, I want him to try more kink than he already had. I did have a finger full of another guy's cum and got him to lick it and he has been able to tell the different tastes like I do, besides, seeing him have cum on his tongue whether it's his or other's, I still get extra wet. Laura Laura and Dave vegasnudecoupl

Oh! I just love a fresh creampie, can't get enough. The wife had her friend over just a few weeks ago and supplied one for me. yum yum facelick He even chuckled when I was making some noise while enjoying

My husband has been eating me a long time after we've fucked and for the last year or more he's even started eating me out after my boyfriend fucks me. There isn't usually a lot of cum inside me though because they both like to cum all over me but there's usually a little.

I got into this several years ago when I was hot and jacking off. I lay on the floor and put my legs over my head and came in my mouth, I loved it. The other night after my baby came home, I finished off on her big tits. I cleaned her up and shared the load with her. Recently I have had fantasies of having another male lover over and just as he is going to cum in her, I would like to take it myself and share with her. I have also fantasized about doing a hand job on a guy until he shoots his load.

Going down on your wife or partner after she has been "oiled" or just "lubricated" is sensual and sexual. My partners have liked it, and I have found it a turn-on. I like the term "oiled" or "lubricated" better than "having creme pie". I don't now why. Anyway, it is something many guys do when swinging, and probably many more do with their wives and girlfriends at home.

I don't think the idea of eating a cum filled pussy is strange at all. I often take extra time doing oral things to my wife so that she has at least one orgasm without penitration, so that I may enjoy her after climax juices. I also greatly enjoy licking and sucking her pussy after we have had a session with another couple and the guy has nailed her good. We have only done this with a few married couples that we know very well. This practice drives us both crazy, and that's what it's all about.

Ironic that you brought this up. I just had the opportunity to do this over the weekend. Yummy, he was so excited watching me eat her out he almost came again. Definitely something we will enjoy doing again, and again. MrsAK

mine and my hubby's fave...we both do it ..of course only with our long time couples who are like wise married. My man loves to eat his own or someone elses ..it is all the same to him...hot and erotic... facelick

Yeah I have tried telling him that I love him and begged him to please talk to me but he went to this brothers yesterday and when he came home late today I saw him talking to his brother when his brother dropped him off, he seemed normal until he saw me and the same hurt and sad expression appeared on his face again ,I felt like I was breaking his world all over again. I just feel like a walking trigger for him and feel like I am just mentally torturing him at this point.