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What was it that Frank Zappa asked about the origins of HIV? “So who’s pluking the green monkeys?” ;-D

There isn't much better than a good blowjob. I met a woman a long time ago who loved giving blowjobs. Her soon to be ex-husband could never cum via oral so she didn't do it much. She asked if she could give me one and give me pointers on how to improve (what a great line!). Always willing to assist a woman in need, I obliged and let her give me a blowjob. Oh....my....goodness.... She was absolutely incredible. Never had one like it before and never had one like it since. No idea why her husband couldn't finish. She was all about pleasing. Any time I wanted one she was ready to go. And she wanted to give me them more than I wanted (5-6 times a week). We never had sex, she never wanted anything in return. We eventually moved too far away from each other and it stopped. I enjoy receiving oral. I feel selfish if I get a blowjob and the provider gets nothing. I'll give oral any time my SO wants it. I enjoy it immensely. Anyway, everyone has their preferences.

How many men enjoy going down on a woman? Giving pleasure to a partner is a wonderful feeling whether you are a man or women. I bet most women on here had their first sexual adventure pleasing a boyfriend either manually or orally. Maybe it’s a feeling of being in control that I enjoy most. I know there are men who can’t cum from oral or so they say, I think they just never got a real blowjob. We have met men that are married to women who just won’t do it or do it horribly.

If it truly is NO response period then njbm has it nailed.

I think alot of husbands are gung ho, ask their wives, get shot down, end of story.

I wrote a nice long trip review that I accidentally deleted so here's the highlights. We are a mid 40s couple that has never been to a Desire property. We have been to Caliente twice for a weekend but do not swap and our experiences have been limited to some voyeurism and minor public sex stuff. First off, the rave reviews about the staff being excellent and outstanding are all true. The staff makes the resort the world class place it is! We didn't communicate with anyone in advance and showed up blind. That's a personal choice but I think making an effort to connect with people that might be there the same time you might improve your stay. If it's your first time, or you don't feel comfortable doing that then it's no big deal. All the other guests are very friendly and it's easy to strike up a conversation with anyone! Cons: More bartenders would have been nice. Not a big deal but those poor guys and girls were overwhelmed. At night on Saturday trying to get a pizza outside the lobby at the bar took about 25-35 minutes. On the plus side it does give you more time to talk to people. Perhaps having staff periodically come in and clean and pick up the play room would have been nice. Remove empty cups and so forth. Pros: Everything Staff is the best I have ever dealt with anywhere in the entire world bar none. The grounds and rooms are very clean. The nightly entertainment is amazing and I would say don't miss it. Performances were behind the lobby. I didn't see if the times were posted but we might have missed it. Other stuff: The people at Desire make the experience. Hands down. I (m) am introverted and have a tough time making conversation. I go from “oh what do you do for a living,” straight to “what's your deepest darkest fear and secret?” There is no subtlety or tact. My wife, on the other hand can converse with anyone and strike up a conversation. I can't get over how nice, and friendly everyone was! You could strike up a conversation with anyone or everyone male or female. It was like the other guests took a real effort to be outgoing and make you feel comfortable. The best part of the vacation for me was the people. Just nice genuine people. And there's naked people. You think people watching clothed people was fun, try taking their clothes off! Since everyone was there with a spouse or partner no one was trying to prove anything. No one was taking a vacation here for their kids or under a rushed schedule to see things. People were there to enjoy their loved one and maybe have some sex. Or a lot of sex. We had boudour photographs taken by Provoke Photography. It was expensive but I highly recommend it. We had never done anything like that before and they do a great job. I would definitely recommend using them for hair and make up. Three young ladies came in performed hair and make up like a formula one pit crew. My wife's hair and make up looked great. Definitely worth the money! Our photographer did an outstanding job of making us feel comfortable and look good! For men the recommendation was a pair of pants and a dark shirt (we were keeping our photo shoot pretty tame). If you have any requests during the photoshoot don't be shy and ask. Everyone was very accommodating. Several hours after the photoshoot we had an appointment and selected our final photographs. It would have been nice to have more time to look at the photos but it seems like they were on a tight schedule that day. Totally recommend Provoke! We also booked an erotic couples massage for two couples (so four masseuses). I contacted Desire in advance and booked it for our last full day there. I thought that if we found a couple we liked we could invite them to join us or we could just have two masseuses each. We ended up each having two masseuses each. It was totally worth every penny, and it was just a great experience. The difference between having one and two people giving you a massage is exponentially greater than you might think. We spent most of our nights dancing in the nightclub and used the playroom twice. In the future I would bring as large of a beach towel as I had with me to the playroom and the vinyl seats didn't have sheets and the provided towels were normal size. Just having your own large towel to put down is nice. We went to the nightclub almost every night. I was worried based on other reviews that there would be a lot of latin music. I LOVE 90s music and I am very happy to say that music was spot on and it was a mix from 80s and 90s music up to modern songs! I think Desire Management heard the criticism and updated their music. I don't know if there was a live DJ or not (when there's naked topless women I get distracted). This was honestly one of my fears, that the music would be subpar but it was outstanding and had everyone on the dance floor! I have zero rhythm but we danced the night away! We dressed for all the theme nights. You can just barely match the theme and do just fine though. We were only there a few days and felt like there was always something on the schedule (foam party, massage, photo shoot, covid test). In the future I would do 7 or 8 days but I would still schedule all the same things. We didn't catch everyone's name unfortunately but had great help from: Cesar for checking us in Rafael our butler took care of anything we needed I flagged down Victor in the middle of the night for four problems at once and he was an absolute superstar! That was the review that is vanilla. We had two other things to mention. The erotic massage. It was hilarious. This was out first time at somewhere so....thorough? I didn't want my wife to feel uncomfortable and take things to far. We talked about it and decided to make it a non sexual massage. They give you a form before the massage and there's a diagram of the human body and you mark where you don't want to be touched. Or where you do want to be touched? Ah fuck, I didn't listen to the instructions. I put a large "X" over my crotch. Does that mean they will touch it? Or will they understand the "X" means don't? Just to clarify I go to the lady at the desk and tell her, just a regular massage is fine. "You have an erotic massage, yes?" She is super friendly and looking at me like I'm an idiot. I'm not sure if she was confused but I was relieved that everything was taken care of. "Yes, but just a regular massage is fine, a normal one." My wife was next to me. Whew, glad that is clarified so we are on the same page. The nice lady at the front desk smiles and says "ok." We are taken to a nice locker room where we lock up our items, shower, and then are escorted to a hot tub with champagne and flower petals in the tub. Then we get taken in for our massage. Two women for each of us. We get the massage and two masseuses are doing a great job. Then they do your legs and thighs and then they do the...THEY DIDN'T GET THE MEMO! At this point I made a legitimate effort and my conscious is clear. They definitely handled my equipment with great skill. They give the massage and then towards the end they stand my up and guide me over to my wife at her massage table. We are covered in wonderful massage oils and are both pretty worked up at this point. Imagine having sex with your wife but you have a cheer leading section ready to step in and give a hand. It was that amazing. The women massesues knew their business! They were skilled! Once I was over with my wife we had intercourse, and it was like having four sets of hands helping you. One was pushing on the small of my back (lol, maybe she thought I needed better rhythm?). Another was running her hands across our bodies and applying a very nice massage oil. I grabbed ahold and sucked on one of my wife's nipples. A few minutes later one of the ladies grabbed my wife's breast and made sure it was in the right position to be sucked but putting right in front of my mouth! Team work makes the dream work. I made a conscious effort to not finish during the massage, and also not when I was on the other massage table with my wife. I wasn't sure what the protocol was and I really like to get my wife off first! We immediately went back to our room hot and heavy! One night we went up to the Hot tub. As we were walking upstairs a couple was walking downstairs and complained there was no one even up there. We figured, roof top hot tub to ourselves? That doesn't seem bad. We go up there and there we no other guests. Also no bartender. Anywhere. Oh well, so we get in the hot tub and about 2 minutes later a group of about 10 people show up. Naked and having fun. They see there is no bartender. So the women start ordering drinks, and this magnificent bastard goes behind the bar naked as a jay bird and starts mixing drinks with the alcohol behind the bar. The man was the hero we needed. He asked "please no complicated drinks." He kept this up for 15 minutes! We figure since it's all inclusive it's certainly not stealing and if you don't want your guests pouring the drinks your job to keep the bar tender there. After a long time and a lot of laughs the bartender shows back up from somewhere and gets to making drinks. He didn't say anything, probably because he could get in trouble, and we didn't say anything because it was hilarious. Here's to you naked guy with a wide brimmed straw hat! Best drinks ever! If you have any questions feel free to ask! Sdc: Slycat8

Friends of ours (who know we are swingers) have told us they would like to swing. We do not want to swing with them (for many reasons). We directed them to this board for some information and advice and suggested trying a local swing club. What advice would you give them?

You are correct. They are super sweet people but neither of us are interested in having sex with either of them. Just not our type. We love them as friends, but that does not translate to interest in having sex with them.

To not do it. For most relationships, monogamy is a far better fit. Some things are meant to be left as fantasies. What little they know of swinging is what they see on porn videos, which are hardly representative of reality. If they insist on pursuing outside sexual partners, they first need to have a sober discussion (or five) about the pros, and cons, of swinging. And how they are going to handle the tangled web of emotions that are sure to envelope them when things do not turn out as they had imagined. Also, they should schedule a time to visit with their family doctor to discuss the health risks associated with higher-risk sexual activities and what things they can do to minimize the dangers. Lastly, they probably want to enlist the support of some trusted lifestyle mentors, people who can help them avoid the inevitable landmines most of us experienced early in our swinging days. Also, they should note what they read on here should not be taken as gospel. They should treat most posts as they would verbal graffiti.

Search is their friend as well. There are plenty of reasons not to swing with friends, and they have been posted numerous times, but the best one is that you don't seem interested.

We were the conduit to two friends who were both new to swinging. The first couple we met was in a very common way for many looking for meeting like minded people. The second was in a tricky way for them. Both women were good friends that discussed swinging and didn’t want to be the first for each other. Unbeknownst to me the second was a member of my gym and I now joke that she stalked me. Her friend knew I belonged to that gym and suggested her friend look me up. I understood the first couple’s hesitation in being a first for her friend. I think it would be best to find someone not being a friend for a first and once comfortable in swinging go back to the original friend.

Join SLS, start with meet and greets.

Ladies, just wondering if there are others out there that have a glory hole fetish? We frequent a club with a G-hole room and I absolutely love it. I love the anonymity. I love seeing, stroking and sucking so many different cocks. My friend and I will actually have orgasms from the experience. Any other g-hole sluts out there?

I haven't read anything. It is a little surprising that general info about such a rare disease coming to America hasn't been investigated. That's journalism 101, right? That's the first question I ask...'where did it come from?'

Or a sneeze or cough.

One other suggestion. Go to a clothed, vanilla meet and greet. You get that in person feel for people, but no compulsion to hop into bed. We communicated with people on SLS who were going to a meet and greet. Other couples’ in person behavior was much different than their profiles or correspondence. You can separate the wheat from the chaff in less than five minutes in person. And since there are many people, you can move on if a couple doesn’t click with you.

I love to give blowjobs (and lick pussy too). While I like if a guy cums in my mouth and I'll eagerly swallow. But after a couple of minutes Red and hubby can't take it anymore and want in my pussy. I much prefer that a guy cums in my vagina anyway. Other guys I've been with like getting oral to ejaculation and I do it for a different thrill, then make a show of rolling the semen around in my mouth before swallowing (but only if he or someone else has or will take care of giving me my Os).

I’ve said it before, but if you want a swinging experience, go to Desire or Hedo or go on a lifestyle cruise. Much more efficient to meet people in person.

Running into same problem ready to just give-up

We keep Astroglide liquid and Astroglide gel on our night stands. We do not need to use all the time (Queen has had menopause and is mostly through it except for occasional hot flashes) but do when we need to. If She wants a quick first plunge, all in all at once (something she really enjoys) I most always use the jell on me first. We are still very active at the club but she has backed way off on playing. Just has lost her interest. But we personally are still very active with each other. Normally a daily activity for us. Although the playful hour of fun playing with each other has all but stopped. Menopause. She used to be very active. Almost too regularly out of control. but in a good way. Now, rarely. But we are very sexual with each other. It all seems different woman to woman.

It's not a fetish of mine but I do enjoy going and play at them. We lived in the Phenix,AZ area and would go to glory hole booths and adult theaters

This is the wife of a bi man who told me early on in our relationship that he wanted another man's dick orally but, was will to go all the way. He didn't know what my reaction would be. Consequencely my reply after some thought was, the subconscious mind and one's fantasiese are cosely related and meant to be explored. This was an open door invitation to our first experience. We immediately signed up for SLS and planned to meet a single bi-courious man at his apartment for some afternoon delight. He was a nice looking man, very gracious and made us feel right at home. We started by take off our clothes and laid naked on the bed with all six hand's exploring each other. I saw my husband going down on his hard dick and I got on the other side. We sucked him to completion. It was a rememberable first time and now we've graduated to an ongoing relationship with another couple. They're both bi. I think bi guys are hot.

This idea is hot. But where we are there are no clean places for that so it will just have to be a fantasy

I do enjoy a good glory hole, I like not knowing who the dick belongs to. I did a glory hole at a bachelor party in my early 20s. They set it up out by the pool, it was a box I was paid to get in it for the night and take care of the cock that showed up. It was insanely hot. I was in there for about 3 hours before some one begged me to come out. I was a hot mess, so I dove in the pool to get the sticky off..

We have done something like this in our group so it’s much safe that a group of unknowns. We put up sheets and we are exposed from the waste down. The guys select who they want to fuck and have at it. I think the best part is that there is no visual involved so you don’t know what’s coming. Maybe his mouth, maybe his finger, maybe he swirls the head of his cock on my opening, maybe he slides inside me - it’s amazing. I also love it when I feel the head of his penis. I imagine the size and shape. I’m never ready for the really hung guys and love the way it feels as i realize what i’m about to get.

I think you may be talking about the Czech glory holes videos by the description. I would LOVE to be one of the women in the waist down hole with my legs strapped up. Just keep getting one after another with all the creampies. I think it would be amazing, but I value my health too much to ever actually do something like that. Sadly it will have to remain a fantasy for me.

I recently saw a video that had men buying tickets and entering a room where women were behind the wall, having fun through glory holes . Some sucked while other got fucked and had orgasms multiple times and men did not give them rest . It was fun to see and hear them. I can lie down and offer my spread legs so that I can get fucked perpetually from gory hole

My wife enjoys glory holes. She enjoys feeling and tasting their cocks. She had no idea their were so many sizes and shapes. Her first time she brought along a very glory hole experienced girl friend who told her to swallow the cum. She wasn't ready for the first guy to shoot. It filled up her mouth so fast it went up her nose and it burned and she became strangled. Her girlfriend told her when he is going to cum put just her lips over the pee hole and suck it down. She'll like it. Wife got good at that and really is turned on swallowing their cum.

We find them fascinating. Sky will watch me and take photos of me and that really turns me on to the point a lot of times I will just back up to them and let things happen. I will usually get nude in the booth and that adds to the fun.

My gf got crazy to give me blowjob every chance we got. She gives me blowjob and swallow 3-4 days per week. I always come very slowly in blowjobs. So the enjoyments are getting higher, higher slowly and i cum in her mouth on top of it. Getting to the top in blowjob is half of the excitement of course, the other one is the hot feeling in her mouth. We like to do it with a little bit surprise and fun. In sitting room, dining room, sometimes in my working room, kitchen. Day, midday, night, doesnt matter if i got my clothes on. Generally it happens without a plan. We did it even one time in a friend’s house, when she was out, and we were waiting for her. It was strange first but we had such fun. And another time when i was at work in the office all night, she had visited me and gave me a blowjob. The most unbelieveble one i’ve ever had. She likes to taste the cum so she swallows with no wasting it and there’s nothing left to pick up afterwards. Eventually her blowjob out our place is one of our excitement fantasy. And we do it everytime we have.

I like, don't love them but don't usually cum from them, but I love going down on a woman. On the other hand one of the couples that we play with regularly, she could care less if anyone goes down on her but she LOVES giving head to the point I have to stop her most of the time.