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3 points💯% correct. When we decided to cross the line into the unknown we made a commitment to enjoy, have fun and explore. The biggest rule we had is to try before saying no and once we said no there would be no questions as to why. Another commitment was to continue to try new things and not to quickly say no. Linda has been more experimental, me not as much because of my lack of desire of being with men. The closest I’ve been is me an another guy being with Linda and in very close contact.
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2 pointsMy wife has done this once. She went away for a 3 day 2 nighter with a long term boyfriend of hers. I'd met the guy of course, and we'd all played in a threesome before. I didn't have any worries or concerns. She had a great time. Me? Not so much...but nothing to do with her being away. I had a medical emergency the second night and had to go to the emergency room. She wanted to hop in the car right that moment and drive home. I told her that was absurd; I was going to be out of the hospital by the time she got back, and there was literally nothing for her to do. Plus, she'd be driving through the night barely able to stay awake. Dangerous. Why give up a great night and following morning only to get back here with nothing to do, plus the risk of making the drive during the night? It didn't make sense. She stayed, I kept her updated, and she...uh...kept me 'updated' too All good. I'm sure we'd do it again if the situation arose. Just, without the emergency room bit this time
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2 pointsShe wasn’t my wife and she wasn’t on the (sexually) receiving end, but one of my grad school classmates gave me a blowjob to orgasm in slow-moving traffic in the Lincoln Tunnel. We were in school in NJ and she wanted to go on an errand on Long Island but was afraid to drive in NYC. She was an FWB and a great sexual partner. There was no explicit or even implicit promise of sexual favors, as there other times were, but I was inclined to do her this favor just on the basis of the ”F" aspect of our FWB relationship. The superb blowjob was an unexpected treat. 😊
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2 pointsThat's what hubby said about me early on, and it's true once I get started. But I told him it's because I was always trying to keep Red and him satisfied since I knew how lucky I am. That's Clair actually. She's always the one always initiating with David, Red, or one of us other women.
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2 pointsWith the our collective kids having been in our vehicles, that would be the least of our concerns.
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2 pointsThat's a wonderful attitude, not just with sex, but life in general. Explore. If it doesn't work out, move on without regret.
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2 pointsHonestly I believe you should. I understand your fears and self confidence issues after a double masectomy but honestly at least for me attraction especially in the life style has very little to do with the physical but more for the erotic nature of having that sexual fun with someone along with your spouse and enjoying the experience as a group it’s even better if you are all friends. That’s not to say you aren’t beautiful or sexy but scars are meant to show we are stronger then the thing that tried to kill us. That alone is sexy enough. So go and enjoy yourself with your spouse and have fun. Those who can’t look past your scars the signs of your triumph aren’t worth the time and energy. Keep it positive and move forward and have fun
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2 pointsWe did things quickly at first too starting with one we met online, then friends we knew for many years, then the originals along with the friends, then we added another which led to a house party.
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2 pointsIn a very short period of time we went from one couple to a camping trip with several couples to a house party.
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1 pointHello - hubby and I have been curious about the LS for years and were about to go to our first club in 2021 when I received the horrible news , fast forward to today I'm done with all IV treatments, my hair has grown in enough to look somewhat decent and we are again discussing the LS, my fear is being comfortable and received well at a club - I needed a double mastectomy and did reconstruction, although I'm not totally pleased with the results, i also had a rare cancer in 2013 that required major abdominal surgery, so needless to say my body has been thru the wringer and I have numerous scars. Will this be a major turn-off to others? Should we even move forward with venturing into newbie territory?
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1 pointPeterJ is correct, I think as I gotten older and my relationship with my spouse evolved my views about imperfections has considerably changed. When my wife and I decided to enter the lifestyle we were interested in the fun and adventure, we were interested in maybe finding a couple we could be friends with where we could go out to the movies, eat, or drink and come to one of our homes and have adult fun. In that pursuit I never was concerned or cared about the imperfections of the other couple like nipples or surgery free was a requirement. I don’t know if that has to do with age or because working in the OR I have seen more breasts and dicks of every variety then some seasoned swingers and in a professional capacity that it’s kinda removed my criticism and judgment due to understanding the pain behind those scars. They should never stop you from having fun. Go out and explore
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1 pointI encourage you and your husband to pursue your interest in exploring the lifestyle and I agree with Gigasangel, scars are almost a badge of honor, at least among those who have reached middle age or older. When I was in my early 60s I was invited to dinner at her home by a (vanilla for sure) female friend since college. We’d never been romantically or sexually involved but had a fairly close friendship. She was a single mom, tall, very pretty, a physician and also a cancer survivor who’d had breast reconstruction following a double mastectomy. After a bit of wine over dinner she confessed that because of her "disfigurement" she despaired of ever finding a romantic/sexual partner. I assured her that she was smart, very attractive and financially independent; plenty of men would find her desirable. "But I don’t have nipples!" was her response. I wish I’d handled that frustrated exclamation better than I did, but I wasn’t out to her regarding the breadth of my sexuality and very broad experiences in the lifestyle. So I didn’t tell my friend about my experience at a party with a beautiful woman who’d had one breast reconstructed and was scheduled to have the other breast removed the next week. While her husband and another man took turns giving her oral I alternated between kissing her on the face and mouth and telling her, with complete sincerity, how pretty and attractive I found her. But I’ll also admit that when I was an adolescent through my 20s I found physical imperfections a negative factor, though not a disqualifying one. My high-school girlfriend had a huge appendectomy scar and former wife had a post-surgical scar that wound halfway around her torso and distorted one of her breasts. I still was very turned on to them physically, but then each of these was in the context of a deep emotional relationship. That’s not the case at a club or party. People do make judgements about what they find attractive in terms of physical and personality attributes — as they do in our everyday vanilla lives. But you won’t be looking to engage sexually with every person there, just some small subset of them, one or two. Two other thoughts. I had a friend who lost her breasts in her 20s. She was understandably self-conscious about that. So she wore a tee shirt when she had sex. Second, in my experience the older the mean age of the attendees, the less judgmental people are likely to be in terms of physical factors. (Of course you get to choose, and it may be that being 15 or 20 years older is a disqualifying condition for you with regard to a prospective partner…)
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1 pointMy wife having a third orgasm is a daily occurrence, and no, I don't mind the mess either!
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1 pointI gestated two children in me who I never even met until they came out.
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1 pointIn our closed group of married couples, it happens fairly regularly. Both Daniela and I have done it several times each. One reason is that someone has to watch our daughter. Daniela more usually now goes with a couple, but has gone with just a guy as well. Another wife and I have a mutual non-sexual interest which our spouses detest, so we go out of town in pursuit of it together. The sex is bonus.
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1 pointI understand; a taboo can be broken, but I want to be there. Variety is the best thing about non-monogamy. Not only doing things that we do with our spouses but in different ways, but also doing things one spouse doesn't like/want to do and even performing acts that never before crossed our minds.
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1 pointAnal sex or we call it fucking in the ass is something special for us. Lin had once said to me that she must love me if she let me fuck her in the ass. Sure she loves me and I love her when we have sex in the vagina or oral and we always say we love the other it’s just that it was emphasized by her saying that she must love me if we are doing anal. I know she doesn’t love it even when she’ll yell out Fuck My Ass. Not wanting her to do anal with someone with me not being there is just a secret communication between us of what’s alright to do. We just started this and we jumped right in, there were no baby steps. We have no rules like others posted, we never said you can’t do this or that, it’s just seems anal didn’t come up. Maybe it will and maybe things we haven’t even thought about.
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1 pointWhat I wrote was confusing even to me. I was trying to say she wouldn’t do anything with them that I would be mad with. If you want to know what would upset me the major act would be anal. I know she doesn’t love it even with me, if she did it with him I wouldn’t be happy.
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1 pointMy wife has gone on several vacations with her bf while I've stayed home and it's always been great. My only requirement is they text me once or twice a day - naughty pics preferred. Of course she loves the freedom and fun, and it's an intensely erotic experience for me. So much that I do wear a chastity device bc betw the erotic intensity and the occasional naughty pic I would simply not be able to focus on work etc. without it. When she gets home our love/sex life is supercharged for weeks and its impossible to keep our hands off each other!
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1 point(Note: Emphasis on a section of Davida’s thoughtful comment above is mine.) If a person’ relationship is such that they are focused on making sure the potential untoward outcome of some decision "would have been on (their partner)" perhaps they should be examining the fundamentals of their relationship instead of whether they should be engaging in recreational sex with others. Just a thought.
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1 pointI agree with you here on the attention part from her here but also agree that husband had many chances to say no outright, he was somehow interested in it too but things didn't go as he imagined. Just our brief story here as I think it might help hopefully... I (husband) was the one who brought this idea into this and she outrighly said no. After months of discussion, pros and cons, she agreed but then would develop cold feet every now and then saying not sure how will she feel. So just to make her comfortable we went to a club and i assured her there will be no play so she went. While there there was nother couple who approached us and I told them that she is on the fence still so they talked to her and she agreed for like touching etc and couple along with me paid 100% attention to her, she like it a lot. Then I carefully found a single guy, talked to him about the situation, finally got her approval to meet him and we had threesome again paying full attention to her. Now we are into it and swap with couples and she enjoys it a lot and so do I thinking it pays to go slow and make the partner comfortable as it was not their idea to begin with.
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1 pointIt has been quite a few years since we have been able to get away for our anniversary and we finally planned a week away for just ourselves at the beach. We decided to go during the late summer when my wife's parents could watch the kids during summer break. We had a lot of anticipation and excitement leading up to it and left early on a Saturday morning to be able to fully enjoy our first day. We had an early check in for the room and got up there before noon and decided to get ourselves settled before going down to the pool area. We splurged and had an ocean-facing balcony so when my wife was unpacking I went out to take a look. When I came back in she was standing there laughing as she held a 24 pack of condoms and looked at me and said, "We are here for 6 days, this might be a bit much." I smiled and said, "Just wanted to make sure I had enough." Of course she couldn't let it go by without responding, "You know, if you just had a vasectomy, we wouldn't need these anymore at all." I replied, "I know, I know." So we finished unpacking and she changed into her bathing suit. We are both 38 and have pretty nice bodies but for her, she doesn't enjoy wearing a bikini anymore. She is 5'6" cute brunette with long hair, a firm sexy ass and soft 36D tits. She changed into a sexy suit none the less, it was kind of like a bikini at the top but with an added amount that covered her stomach. I didn't mind as I could still admire her breasts. When we got to the pool area we went right to the bar and the drinks kept flowing. We laid by the pool, walked by the beach and spent some time in the water but mostly just had drinks in our hands. On the way back to the room we stopped by the front desk and bought a few 6-packs for the fridge in the room. We walked up to the room carrying our beer and as soon as we got inside we put the beers down and started really kissing, then she pulled away and said to save it for later because she wanted to have a few drinks on the balcony. I hand her one and she goes out on the balcony while I put the others in the fridge. Then I walk out and hear her talking to someone, that's when I saw that the room next door had an adjoining balcony. He was a younger guy named Jeremy and was having a pleasant conversation so I offered him a beer and then sat down. We talked for a while and it was a lot of fun and my wife then made a comments and said, "You must be having so much fun with all these young sexy girls on the beach." He just laughed and said that he enjoyed some of the sights. I jumped in and responded, "I like what I get to look at" and got an eye roll from my wife. My wife said she wished she still had the body she used to have, especially the perky tits. Without thinking I reached over and grabbed a tit and said that they were great. I expected her to swat my hand away but she left it there and said I only liked them because I was stuck with them. I immediately looked at Jeremy and asked if he thought they were nice too and he just smiled and said he didn't mind looking at them. This is when I realized that the drinks had really hit her because she stood up and leaned over, squeezing them together with her hands saying, "They might look good from this angle." She bent over a little too far and fell into his lap and they both started laughing. She collapsed on her knees in front of him and looked at him and asked, "Do you really think they look nice?". He insisted yes and she still argued that he was just saying it to be nice. So I leaned forward and reached around and grabbed her top and pulled it open with her tits spilling out. "Now he can see them and I know he likes them," I said. He said they looked so nice and soft and that he really did think they were nice. She told him how sweet he was and that she wanted to make sure he got a nice view of them and I sat and watched as she reached forward and pulled his swim trunks to his ankles. I sat speechless ash she leaned forward and squeezed her tits around his dick slowly tit fucking his cock to make him hard. As she did it she asked if her tits were as soft as they looked and if he enjoyed the way her big areolas looked on her big tits. "Those are the most suckable nipples I have ever seen," he responded. She quickly stood up and pushed one of her tits in his mouth and his hands immediately went to her ass and he effortlessly slid her bottoms off. As he was sucking her nipples back and forth he was also rubbing her pussy and driving her wild. She spread her legs open wide enough to straddle him and sat down on his lap with his dick in between them. He was really enjoying her tits and I know how much that turns her on and how crazy he was driving her. It was then that she leaned forward dragging her pussy along his dick then letting the tip touch her pussy as she started working her way down on it. At this moment is when I noticed just how big he was, she was about halfway down and working it up and down inside her but he wanted more. He grabbed her ass and started pulling her down onto his dick. She moaned, "Oh my god I am so full. You are so deep. This is stretching me out so much. God keep going". When she said keep going is when he thrust his hips upward and went all the way inside her. She was just moaning "Oh fuck me!" over and over as she rode his dick through an orgasm. She was really pushing down to get it all inside her when I saw him grab hold of her ass and clench up and I knew he was cumming. She got up right after and walked inside the room and I didn't know how she felt about what just happened. She was only gone for a minute and came back with a beer and handed it to Jeremy. Then she turned and got on her knees in front of me and pulled my pants down to see my already hard dick. She sat on my lap like she did his and had my dick pushed between us. She was kissing me deeply and then kissing my neck and told me to close my eyes. So I did and and the next thing she did was slide back a little and then I feel her touch my dick. She kind of giggled as she unrolled a condom onto me then got on top and pushed my dick inside her. She was riding me and told me that since I brought condoms that I needed to use them. She kept talking and said: "Wow, doesn't this feel so strange to get sloppy seconds while wearing a condom. Jeremy made my pussy all loose and sloppy for you." I couldn't think with how wild this situation was. She looked at me and continued, "You know he hasn't even kissed me and I have his cum in my pussy." With that I tensed up and came in the condom. She went inside the room and laid down in bed and fell asleep immediately. Jeremy and I finished our beers and then both went to our rooms. I laid in bed for hours replaying what just happened as she slept soundly through to the morning.
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1 pointHubby has a vasectomy. He got it when we started in the lifestyle. I was on the pill when we first started but my doctor raised the danger of stroke so I am not taking any birth control any longer. Hubby doesn't;'t need to wear a condom but he still does. I wish we could play bareback, the feeling of closeness is incomparable, but I can't so he chooses not to. The few times we played with a unicorn friend of ours bareback I encouraged him to cum in her so I could lick his cum out of her. It was one way we could all feel bonded and closer.
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1 pointThank you he came by a week ago and wanted to pick up some stuff we ended up talking for almost three hours he was not so anxious anymore I even hugged him when he walked in I was honestly glad to see him and he did not flinch or pull away. I told him everything how I had been doing and he told me how he was doing it was no yelling or drama more him just listening to how I have been doing and he was not doing much better, I decided to make one final attempt and asked him to please move back home. He seemed receptive and he ended up staying the night and even slept in the same bed .. no sex but he was sleeping i just watched him for maybe half an hour while he slept and when I woke up he was still sleeping next to me I was so happy to see that he had not left or was in the guest room again. We ate breakfast together and it was probably the most normal day I have had in awhile and he just said how sorry he was for not telling about what had happened to him about the trauma I told him I was sorry too. He went to work and I just decided to unpack his stuff that he had packed in boxes and put his things back he came home and he never said anything. We are giving this another go he also told he started seeing a therapist to deal with his trauma and we are also gonna see someone as a couple. He had also told the renter that he was not gonna move into the flat after all so he is stuck with me for the time being
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1 pointOkay, we'll update after the party. And... update to the update; we're now RSVPed for a Luau house party in Raleigh the following weekend! Now we get to shop for sexy hula skirts. We both got so hot last night shopping for labia jewelry that I ended up with my hands tied behind my back and spanked for my dirty thoughts.
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1 point...A quick update is in order. I booked a room on the party floor of an upcoming themed hotel party. I've had so much fun putting my nasty school girl outfit together and talking to my hubby about what dirty things I want others to watch me doing (there's going to be a Sybian there!). It's less than two weeks away and we've been fucking more than usual just thinking about how much fun we're going to have. We both plan on keeping it watching and touching only but I've admitted that I am hoping for a glory hole opportunity. The anonymity of it is a turn-on.
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1 pointThe first several times my husband played was with female friends and acquaintance I had set him up with. (A control thing for me.) They were eager to fuck him (women like trying things other women have, and it wasn't immoral since I suggested it), but they didn't want me there. I deliberately told hubby not to rush back from her place, or the hotel (damn, she was still living with her parents), or for her to leave our apartment. The burn while waiting was intense. 🙂 Yeah, I was so wet I soaked my pants. It looked like I peed myself. Unfortunately, David did such a good job with them he couldn't get erect for a while after he (or I) got home. Fortunately, I my had my boyfriend Red to fuck as I interrogated hubby. Also fortunately, we had passed the point where there were inhibitions between the guys being there as I did it with the other.
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1 pointYes indeed. Jealousy went from being my greatest fear to my best friend. I am still jealous, but am now addicted to it. I no longer fear it, but play with it. I am like a kid who is scared shitless on the roller coaster, but then immediately wants to go again.
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1 pointYour entire post is well thought out and well stated. We've all have had bad ideas in our poly family (only a few involving sex), where one of us has talked one or more of the others into something that didn't work out or even became a disaster. But we don't lay blame, we talk it through, think about if readjusting could make it a success, try again (maybe), and when appropriate don't do that or go there again. Life is full of those situations.
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1 pointOh yes there are.. and some masquerade as bi.. we met a guy for a MFM years ago, and he got hard sucking Mr Real, but lost it when Mrs went down on him, and other than a casual playing of the nipples, hands never went south never touched her pussy, but went back after Mr's Cock
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1 pointFollow Zachary Zane on twitter, he's a hoot. Wife and I are out bisexuals. But it was relatively hidden until Bostock vs Clayton County. Since then you'll find us at Pride, at LGBT bars for burlesque/comedy/etc, and joined the LGBT org at work. In a swinging context I will say we've never encountered a straight woman. And not one man has turned down the offer for a dual blowjob...
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1 pointI read this Guest Essay, as The Times now calls them, earlier today snd found it quite interesting. I’m a subscriber but last time I checked you could register and read several articles per week. (That may have changed.) The moderators here quite correctly don’t permit the posting of copyrighted material, but I’m sure the brief passage below, which is critical to the thrust of the essay, falls under the fair usage exemption to the law: "…according to Gallup, the majority of adults in the L.G.B.T.Q. community identify as bisexual, at 54.6 percent." I never would have guessed the percentage was nearly that high. Which leads to the writer’s point, that if they are to be accepted in both the LGBTQ and wider communities bisexuals need to be better about coming out than they have been.
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0 pointsMy wife did something similar. She went backpacking on the Appalachian trail with her friend Sue. Sue’s hubby decided to go along. Then at the last minute his buddy joined, so the four of them were together two weeks. I know they went skinny dipping together. After the trip Sue and wife were texting and sue accidentally texted my number ( one digit different) and mentioned my wife and the other guy fucking in his tent and in a lodge after the hike. She cuckoled me for two weeks. I’m still no happy about the deception.
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