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Since Joining I noticed that we haven't posted about our first experience in the lifestyle and thought it would be an interesting read. The Wife and I have always had a desire to look into the lifestyle but we had a couple of issues to address along the way. Once the issues that were affecting our attempts at liberating our sexual side we needed a way to test the waters safely which we could better manage incase we needed an immediate abort option. Weirdly enough I asked my best friend/best man and oddly enough the god father of our daughter to help me and he agreed. The days leading up to the event my wife was kinda freaking out and getting into her own head about the experience, how would be viewed, if my friend would find her unattractive, etc. The day came and we couldn't decide how to break the ice, I suggested she come out in my robe and we can go from there. Well she eventually came out and she was a nervous wreck. I tried to kiss her and slowly undress her and then I asked my friend to touch her and he rubbed her for about a minute before she freaked out and put the robe back on and left. I left and we discussed it and she expressed her feelings again of being ugly and being thought of as a whore and we talked it out and we got dressed and hung out with my friend till he left the next morning. a few days later she apologized for freaking out and we talked about what happened, her expectations and mine ( I honestly didn't have any except she enjoy herself) and what she wanted to do. I texted my friend who lives a few towns over if he would be okay coming over and trying it again. He said okay and we went from there. We discussed it over the next few days we were gonna do and how to approach everything and we settled that me and her would start to have sex and she would blind herself and my friend would come in and join in. So the day came and we went out for sushi, hung out and we finally got to the point of the night to try it. We took a shower, I told her how beautiful and sexy she was and we got out and started to have sex. She blind folded herself and texted my friend to come in, he came in to our room and then got naked, he went in front of my wife when I asked him and she started giving him a blow job, soon enough she took the blindfold off and was looking around as she sucked him off and I fucked her. I asked her if she wanted him to fuck her and she said yes. So we switched positions, My wife took my dick out of her mouth to tell me she loves me and she is excited for him to fuck her and.. he goes soft. Come to find out he has performance anxiety issues about the experience and kinda shuts down. The night is finished by me and her fucking and he eats her out and she sucks him off while I fuck her and then the night ends. The following morning she tells me how excited she was to try everything and she really enjoyed the experience and wants to try it again. unfortunately our friend has left for his house and we plan to see if he will try again with us. He agrees and a few weeks later we try again and this time its a bit more open, we openly talk about how we will fuck her later and the things we will do and she is extremely turned on and excited. The time comes and this time he is able to fuck her for about 2 minutes before he goes soft again... this time he is concerned we will judge him on his performance because while he was fucking her doggy style she almost made him cum quickly and it was hard for him to get hard from that point again (fucking her doggystyle I personally call the closer because of her soft skin and soft ass, along with the way her pussy moves your dick so she rubs the right spot. its hard to not come quickly doggy style with her. ) Since then we have discussed how we both enjoyed the experience and how we would like to move forward and thus here we are. Hopefully you enjoyed that roller coaster experience cause that was a complicated experience to write in the first place.

Is watching women with strap-ons how Sigmund Freud came up with his theory that women have penis envy? Is that theory still valid?

I don't squirt, but I can soak my pants with my natural lubrication juices when I'm excited. It can be a problem sometimes.

I read this post years ago and just skipped over it because it didn’t mean anything to me or my life. Now I came across the post again and reading some of the answers trouble me. It reminds me of an old adage, or is it a bible verse, He who is without sin, let them throw the first stone. Let’s substitute other situations for the word sex. If it were legal would you: Speed while driving Smoke pot, I know it is now legal in some places. Talk on your phone while driving. Have a few drinks before driving Jaywalking Not picking up your dog’s poop Littering Using a false name on the internet How about singing Happy Birthday in public, it’s a copyrighted song. Playing cards with your friends Public drunkenness Certain sexual behavior and the big one everyone is upset with PROSTITUTION. You might think of many of these acts as Victimless Crimes or consensual crimes, crimes that don’t harm. Bigamy, ticket scalping, gambling, and prostitution. Some have noted that many of us are prostitutes without thinking we are. Do people in the lifestyle bring a gift to a meeting or party knowing sex is involved. Others noted that we have been rewarded for sex with a dinner, a movie Or possibly a small trinket. Do you think getting a reward for having sex is wrong? Why not ask why a person would accept a gift, cash, for having sex. Is accepting a gift any different from getting satisfaction from sex with a stranger. We all have needs, some are physical, some emotional, and others have needs to pay rent or bills. Who are we to judge others needs?

I just watched the Keith Ablow show, kind of like Dr. Phil but no solving anyone's problems, just discussions, questions, more of a talk show. It was about the Bunny Ranch in Nevada where prostitution is legal. A tour showed how this place works. Each male is somewhat screened before selection of a girl. They go into a living room with private nooks so the girl can talk with the gentleman and get to know a little about him. Each girl is a private contractor and can turn down the gentleman if she doesn't want to do him. Each girl has her own rules about what she will and will not do, and sets her own price for what the guy wants. One girl in her late 30's early 40's had worked at the Ranch 7 months, entertained 75 guys in that time and made over $100,000. That averages over $1,300 per guy, so they are all professionals, not riff raff. 75 guys in 7 months is about 3 guys per week @$1300 each is about $4000 a week x 52 weeks is about $208,000.00 per year. This lady is married. She had a discussion with her husband about going to work there. She said on the show she likes sex with strangers. If they were not in Nevada it may have been a discussion about swinging 3somes. All the girls were asked why they enjoyed their job and all said they loved sex, the money was great, but they liked sex. My impression was they would have worked for office wages to have the sex. They, like swingers, realize the difference between sex and love. They, like swingers, had sex with men they just met, as wives do at an on-premise sex club. I am not trying to say swingers are like prostitutes. The thread is for fun, information and deep thinking, and maybe a fantasy. Please don't flame me if you take exception to the thread or make assumptions I have not made. The question is, if such a place as the Bunny Club was legal near you, would a swinger wife work as a prostitute there? The word "prostitute" prompts a negative reaction. If you would be called something like a sex therapist practitioner, not having the stigma as "prostitute" does, would you, as a swinger who likes sex with other men, do it for that kind of money in a nice, clean place like the Bunny Ranch was portrayed? Three guys a week for five years is over a million dollars. You would never have to work again in your entire life. Would you do it? Or would you give it away as a swinger, thinking your morals are above playing for money? The wife could be in one room, getting money for sex while her husband could be in another room and give the money back to the girl he was having sex with, a net result of zero dollars. Just like couples who swing in separate rooms.

My wife reserves condom free for me and a selected few. SHE says swinging means going all the way. She's not a fan of condoms so she chooses her swinger partner carefully. She has just two who she lets finish inside her. Also both of their wives let me go bareback.

I'm not sure if you're just wanting to make a statement? Or, if you're actually interested in discussing the subject? I'll give this the benefit of the doubt and assume your intention is the latter. Respectfully, the people who say they have "no problem" with prostitution are, knowingly or unknowingly, being intellectually disingenuous. And it's easy to prove. To those who say they have "no problem" with prostitution, here are a few questions to ponder: Would you like to live next door to a brothel? Would you like to raise your children while living next door to a brothel? Would you like a brothel located next to your children's grade school or high school? Would you like a brothel located next to your place of work or your place of worship? Would you like a brothel located next to your mother's or grandmother's house? Would you invite a prostitute and her pimp to your house for dinner? I'll go out on a limb and say the answers to those questions are, "No." So, in reality, the people who say they have "no problem" with prostitution actually do have a problem with it. They just haven't thought through the question thoroughly enough to realize they do. As informed adults, we understand prostitution carries with it certain inescapable social ills. Prostitutes do not sell their bodies because of the "glamour" of the job or because they "like sex". That's ridiculous fantasy that bears no semblance to reality. Most prostitutes are young, poor run-a-ways and lead very troubled, miserable lives. Many have been sexually abused. Many are addicted to illicit drugs. They are broken, desperate people (mostly girls) at the ends of the ropes. Prostitutes are not sexually liberated. They are sexually exploited--both by the "johns" who patronize them and by the pimps they work for. In fact, it is usually the pimps who "farm" the young run-a-ways into prostitution, first by getting them addicted to drugs, then by coercing them into prostitution to pay for their habits, then by terrorizing them with physical violence to keep them earning. The girls are objectified and dehumanized, and are essentially subjected to a modern form of human bondage. Then, when the girls are in the deep stages of their addictions and have lost whatever sex appeal they once had and can no longer turn tricks, their pimps discard them like used toilet paper. How many "happily retired" prostitutes have you ever met or read about? I find prostitution to be repugnant not because of some holier-than-thou moralistic position, but because the objective evidence provided by law enforcement, researchers, and healthcare workers leads me to that conclusion. I'll be glad to read your reply.

Who was it that said, “You don’t pay a prostitute for sex, you pay her to leave.”?

This is the kind of guy that Daniela had emotional and sexual relationships with before we married. Relationships that were self-limiting because married men didn't leave their wives, so there was no concern that they wanted to impulsively get married or move in or something. Usually she had two, sometimes three men like this going at the same time in order to get what she wanted, sexual or otherwise, when she wanted it. Now one of our rules is "no married men unless the wife approves," and in our closed group of married couples all the wives approve. Daniela still likes the fact that the guys are all married, the wives approve, and they are all bi. She used to chase down lesbians too and no longer needs to.

Same with my wife. I was thankful for this and it made me realize early on in our marriage that I, and probably no one man, would be enough to satisfy her in that regard. So I told her that she could play. The rule is that her activity doesn't displace me; it hasn't. Letting Daniela fuck other men was one of my best moves ever. Yep, Daniela can go from total disinterest to 100 in 30 seconds.

Certainly, if it happens, but I doubt it. I've had guys hit on me before, but this is one of the few I seriously considered and will do if his wife tells me it's ok.

We could have and I would have if he weren't married. Girlfriend or even fiancée I would have in a heartbeat, but not a wife unless I have her permission. Meanwhile, it feeds our sex life at home.

Being an Alpha doesn't mean it doesn't feel good. You sound like my husband. Anal play is part of the natural course of things, its down there where everything is happening so of course it's going to get included whether planned or not. Back in the day when we used to get hot and heavy things happened and anal happened. We touch, we grab, fingers slip here and there in the heat of the moment and so forth. Now it is a very planned part of our sex. Over the years and the many many many orgasms I have had from anal along with vaginal, my husband began to realize anal is amazing (to receive) and could as amazing for him. The more he let me play the more open he became and soon the man was having orgasms as large as me and multi (something he had never experienced). We didn’t open our marriage up till much later and then only to people who understood we were only doing it for things we could not provide for each other alone, hence the reason for groups. One male doesn’t provide enough by himself, he needs friends. As I have mentioned in prior posts: I cannot get enough cum from one man, I enjoy it that much; I cannot get multiple holes filled with real live bareback cum filled cream puff stuffed penises with only one man; and I have no way to cum fill or cream fill my man’s holes without other men. So I needed to find a way to get men. For my husband, the comfort level was not there for males only to join us so I found couples. With couples I had to give as much as we got of course. I wasn’t expecting to do all that I do with the wives, but to not be a taker I made myself available for them. You do what you need to do to keep the group smooth. My husband who has no interest in men or really other women does have such a strong interest in my desires and connecting with me in any manner possible eventually gave in. For years we had done him anally and he knows how amazing that is so he would come to the group sex parties and watch. It took a while for him to try a few things here and there like cum kissing with me after I’d sucked one of the men off, then more, then cum swapped. Then I was asked to eat some of the wives’ cream pies, he helped. As we played watching others he was always rock hard, leaking all over and never flinched if someone touched him a little bit. The first time one of the husband’s did me doggy, he sat staring into my eyes as the man came inside me. It was the oddest sensation for us both. That was my first face sit on him. Then another man took me over him, and another, cum and penises are all over his face. So much has happened I get some of the timelines confused now but we were in a similar position with me sitting on his face cum leaking, a send or third penis in me over him, and one of the husband’s stepped in between his legs. I guided him into my husband. There is so much to tell but it is a very long tale. To the point I want to make with you, as per my husband & myself, nothing you can simulate or do is the same as taking a real bareback cream filled cock in your mouth or other holes. Nothing feels the same as it, looks the same, or provides as great of an aftermath picture. The orgasms from it are so intense it is hard to crave it daily and hourly. Since all of this, he has F ed me, all of the other ladies, vaginally, orally, and anally. He has sucked every guy off hundreds of times, been F ed by them as many times anally, and been cum in as many. So from our little meager interest things have expanded as do all things sexual for us. When with others, we still primarily focus on the main things we cannot do as a lone couple. For example, my husband can get all the anal he ever needs doing me so he does not do the other ladies anally often and he has never done a guy. He has no reason to and doesn’t want too. As far as being an Alpha, some men feel they are Alphas and only do others but if you are not into doing it with men why would you? My husband is not into guy’s butts. I however AM! My man is now perfectly content with letting the guys have at him. He’s a receiver and from what I can tell a pretty good one. My husband receives it from toys, machines, me, strap ons, the other ladies, and men and he feels no less than he ever did. He is very manly. Receiving is extremely pleasurable and he knows how much it does for me to be there watching up close, playing, touching, encouraging. There is something so amazing to be right there as his wife seeing and feeling him getting rummaged unloading penis after another and telling him all the while, you can do it, you can take it, you love doing this for me, you are so amazing at taking c***, I love you, I love that you do this for me, I love watching you get F ed in your … It does take a lot of patience and time to get to this point in relationships. Take it slow and play at home, RP a lot, use toys, machines, simulate it all in a variety of scenarios. Even that will be awkward at times. A few weeks ago I was pleading for my husband to take a giant black c*** while I was dping one of our sex machines. I was screaming how much I knew he wanted big black cocks and their cum inside him. He was like, “No I don’t.” Awkward… And yes he has done that and enjoyed them. He wasn’t as turned on as me yet, he’d just gotten out of the shower. I can tell you from my experience and from watching all the couples we have been with, the one who flourish and are the most exciting are the ones who play together, in the same room, stay together or as close as possible, try to watch, talk, and encourage each other as much as possible, kiss a lot, hold hands a lot, hug, and love on another often. It is so cool to watch a wife getting ravaged by several people while the husband is by her side getting done likewise and they are hold hands, glancing over at each other. So many times I see couples stretched out touching as they are doing what they are doing. Since your wife is interested in females I highly recommend joining her. I love it when anyone and my husband are dual doing me and I would much rather have my husband right there sucking and tonguing with me as I tend to the wives. I love sharing with him. That is why we got into this in the first place, not to have sex with others, but to share having sex with others, to share the experiences. We have an unbelievable connection and relate more on a deeper level now. I now get why my husband loves eating p***y so much but it is still so much better together. He agrees.

Oh yeah babe, that shit is fire! Do it. Send me the video!

ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY! I would watch my man sucking dick all day long! Freaking love it! I wish more guys were more fluid too.

I’m recently married and my wife enjoys sex and exploring and so do I. We are both fit and athletic built so we tend to attract very easily people. We have never explored swinging even though she wants to be with a women. She’s very shy about it but fears it could effect our marriage. She also loves to play with my ass and has bought a dildo and a strap. I’m not into that at all actually but I let her do it and she loves it. Being a Alfa make it felt weird but it was ok as I’m open to exploration. She has voiced fantasies of have a bi couple to play with us including the guy wanting to play with me and vice versa with her. I’m not bi but curious as like with her. It’s strange to feel that I would be interested in that but wanted to know if other couples have tried it even men and what was the outcome. We are both opened about our sexuality but have never pushed past our bedroom to seek it out or what to expect

I don't think a full swap couple where the wife doesn't do any oral would be a deal breaker. My experience is that about half of women are so bad at it that you don't want it anyway. There have been a few couples where I stopped the other wife after 30 seconds because it was so lousy (painful even). Those encounters...I was happy to watch my SO than engage with the other wife.

A true bisexual is that way as they have a love for sex and the human body regardless of wheter they are male or female. Very true....I've come to realize this as I explored MM activity more and more. I still LOVE women the most but having an appreciation for a hot male body never hurt either

I agree with Lascivious L&L April 2010 post. I too am a married bi male and my wife does know I am bi as she has known that since we first met almost 4yrs ago. We sometimes play with single men, women as well as couples. My wife doesn't mind if I go down on a guy and sometimes she will just watch as I play with one alone. Don't get me wrong I'm far from gay as I love eating pussy way way too much hence the username Pussylicker4u. I find it just fun to endulge in both men and women as it can be an extremely hot time especially if the other couple has a bi male as well. We don't require the other person or couple to be bi as we do respect that not everyone is into but like other posts say things do happen in the heat of the moment so what the heck might as well have fun. My other view point on bi sexuality is that you only live once so you might as well have fun living life to its fullest so who cares if a person is bi or not. I think that there are too many contradictions to bisexuality as it is anyway. Think about it a woman can be bisexual and no one thinks twice but when a guy says he is he is automatically pegged as being a queer. Now I find that a double standard as bisexuality is the same across the board regardless if your male or female. A true bisexual is that way as they have a love for sex and the human body regardless of wheter they are male or female.

I am a married man, I'm bi, and my wife and I have a wonderful time with men who aren't afraid of their sexuality. I'm fortunate that she is aroused by man on man sex and can't help joining in. Kissing after a blow job, licking her while she's being fucked, going down on her when she's filled with cum, yes! All wonderful, hot actions. The heat of the moment can truly inspire! If you're afraid of your own cum, if you won't kiss your wife after she's given you a blow job, then aren't you letting fear keep you from some very intimate pleasures. After all it's your own cum! I can understand not wanting to taste another man's cum. But if your wife does, if she blows another man and he cums in her mouth, would you really fear kissing her immediately? It's so hot! Same with going down on her after she's been fucked by another man. She's warmed up and in the mood, how could you say no to lighting that fuse??? Seize those hot, intimate moments.

Is it you--or do you simply have a variety of more attractive choices in this society at this time? There are those that would rather die than become a prostitute-and those that would engage in prostitution if it was a choice between staying middle class via prostitution-and abject poverty. From what I've heard, in Brazil, prostitution among middle class women is _much_ more common in the US. Brazilian society is much more harsh-you have things like bad credit ratings that stick with someone the rest of their lives. I've known women who did this. Now, this wasn't a real "high end" kept woman. She was a "welfare mom" who had children with 5 different men-4 of whom were well-to-do businessmen(older guys with a bit of real estate-not the type that would buy a Mercedes). Those guys knew dang well it was cheaper to keep her happy than to bring governmental services into the issue-so "father unknown" went on the birth certificate-and they paid on the side. She dabbled in swinging-and as well as the clients usually had a "boy toy" or two around. This lady wasn't especially good looking-or educated-but she wasn't an idiot-and was "morally flexible". basically what she got was most of what child support would have been-plus a lot of independence, public assistance and a good relationship with the fathers of her kids. Now welfare laws have changed a bit-I'm not sure how this niche works in today's kinder, gentler america. The other variation I've seen is the "corporate concubine". Basically women that are attached to a highly placed corporate executive-and follow that guy where ever he goe-and get placed into jobs for which they aren't qualified for on the basis of providing sexual favors(or at least the possibility of them). Basically it is hard for executives to pay themselves a high salary, but if they are in a position to hire folks, they can hire "concubines" as a perk--and hide that. From what I could see, some of these ladies were more attached to their corporate patrons than their own husbands. Now, those ladies run the risk of getting discarded--or passed around- as they age-and they are more likely to be highly emotionally attached to what is really a sociopathic corporate manager--and to be strung along financially. I've seen companies where a lot of the higher level managers were lesbians-because I think they tended to be more trustworthy in that respect than their male counterparts-and were thus able to better maintain cohesion in their corporate harems. I'd personally rather my daughter become a kept woman-or a prostitute that saves her money than a corporate concubine. However, as private wealth in the US gets more and more concentrated, we are seeing more these "games". Also, any place I've lived where there was a lot of disposable wealth, there was lot of prostitution--and kept women and such.

Could I be a protitute? Probably not. I am just FAR too picky. I wouldn't make any money. I have no moral issues with it, that's a personal choice. It's just not for me. Plus, I agree with one of the previous posters - I'd be anal about it...I'd need every man I chose to hook up with to present me with a clean bill of health, preferably hand written, signed by their doctor AND notarized. Haha. Now being a "kept-woman" or "courtesan" COULD fly with me. Does it happen much in today's society? I doubt it. I'm not very needy...I don't want jewels or a Mercedes...I want my mortgage and my college loans paid. Haha. And I wouldn't have 50 men running into the brothel each night that I know nothing about and may/may not be physically attractd to...I'd have 3 or 4 men in my life that would be sweet and doting. Hmmm...or maybe I say that because I'm in love with Victorian-era romance novels. *shrugs*. I'm kind of old fashioned in that I want the people I hook up with to atleast LIKE "ME" a little...not just my body or my mind-blowing sexual abilities

While it is interesting to compare swinging women with professional prostitutes I am going to have to say that they are two completely different things. I think it is like comparing a professional NASCAR driver to a taxi driver. They both drive cars and make money doing it but the simalarities pretty much end there. I think your swinger/prostitute comparison ends at enjoying sex and separating sex and love. Heck my grandmother probably enjoyed sex and I know she knew there was a difference between sex and love but she was niether a swinger or prostitute. There probably are some hookers that are in the lifestyle that do both for the reasons you mentioned but I would be willing to bet that if you were to sit down and really talk to the married hookers you would find that most of them would consider themselves to be in a traditional monogamous marriage when they punch out from work at the end of the day. Swingers may see a separation between sex and love but swingers also are largely interested in the open and erotic social envirnment and get a lot pleasure and excitement from both the sex as well as the social interaction. Hookers may enjoy sex to a degree , afterall sex is pleasurable, but make no mistakes the hookers are in it for the money and for the work hours. They are going to work just as you and I. I enjoy my job and if I am being interviewed on tv I will say I love it, but I go to work every day for the pay and benifits pure and simple. I would not do it for free just because I enjoy it and I bet the hookers view it the same way. Many have home and families for the same reason we all do and they go to work for money to pay for the home and families just like we all do.

Ya know, one of my best female friends (Mr. LFM is my bestest friend) did a speech for college on legalizing prostitution in Idaho. She talked to many of the girls at the Bunny Ranch for her information, and come to find out, many of the girls there are married, yet are just going to "work" like they would at any other job. They do their work, go home and have a family to take care of there. She named names and talked to some of the regular girls at the Ranch who've worked there for quite a while. What a lot of people might not know is that the girls at the Ranch donate a lot of their money to charities around there. They've bought a new ambulance for the EMS unit and they also chipped in and rebuilt a house for a families that was destroyed by fire. Their hearts are big as gold. I could do that! I really could! I don't know about the label, but I'd be a girl who just loves sex! She spoke to many of the girls and everyone loved their jobs. After hearing her speech, she convinced me that I should work at the Bunny Ranch and I should fight to make prostitution legal in Idaho.