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Finding a 4 way match is hard and will probably take some time. Just understand this and know if you do nothing, you won't find anyone. IOHO, it was worth the work and time it took to find other matching couples. Just be patient and don't try to force something that isn't there. If there is a match for one of you and not the other, just move on to the next couple and keep going until there is. One other thing: when we start communicating with a potential couple, we recommend meeting them sooner than later. You will learn more about them in 5 minutes in person than you will ever learn via text, email, etc. Meet them for drinks or dinner with both couples knowing that there is no playing planned or expected. This will eliminate any pressure that either side may feel. Meet, talk, and then decide is there is any spark. Sometimes the book really is more enjoyable than just the cover...and sometimes the cover is all there is with no story. We prefer books with great stories.

It seems to me that even among the general, vanilla population female bisexuality isn't viewed negatively. Everyone is a stranger a some point, sex is a nice way of introducing oneself. When my wife and I were first intimate, we quickly and excitedly spoke about our sexual past. I told Daniela that I didn't need to have her recite everything, it wasn't a test. I just wanted to hear her tell me about the good times she had, the fond and exciting memories. My story was fairly short and boring, I had been monogamously married for twenty years. Daniela had much more to tell.

My wife could never go back to her short time of being monogamous. I probably could with her; she satisfied all my need during our monogamy. Plus, my ex-wife and I were monogamous during our 20 year marriage. Sex with her was good as well. Good enough that we kept screwing during and after the divorce.

Not necessarily. I suppose the "gangbang" definition can be open to interpretation but essentially we think of it is a woman having sex with more than 2 men. That can mean 2 or 3 at once with other guys waiting their turn. A lot of times guys will bust their nut and then reload hoping to get back in again. I think some women like it because they are the center of attention and they have lots of guys wanting her and fighting for her. Having done these with my GF I can say two things for sure - #1 they are very demanding and #2 they can be very emotional. They are physically demanding and can also be emotionally demanding depending on the woman and experience which is why they can also be emotional. Having said that, they can also be exciting, satisfying, and proving feelings of exhilaration and accomplishment when finished. But because they are so demanding (depending on the gangbang of course - 3 guys is a lot different than 30) they can't be part of every day sex like one on one and are only a treat.

I don’t know much about gangbangs or how they work but isn’t that just a woman having one on one with multiple men where one finishes and another jumps on not one woman with two men at the same time. From what I’ve read Gangbangs are more a man’s fantasy and not many women want it.

Welcome to my world! My wife and I have been in this arrangement since 2016 and it has worked very well for us! I would like it to be known that when we talked about this type of arrangement, it was her that brought up the idea of her fucking someone else while I am present. I loved the idea, I love my wife and when she approached me about the idea I was instantly in. I don’t have a desire to touch or have sex with another woman as I get plenty of pleasure watching her and participating in her activities. This arrangement has led to lots of orgasms for her, me and any lucky guy we invite. She even got comfortable enough with one guy to schedule weekly time with him when I away telling me about it when I returned. We are both very comfortable and happy with our experiences and it’s unbelievably sexy to watch and listen to her fuck someone else. I could be the odd ball guy agreeing to this but this was her idea initially and IMO she’s way too sexy to not share. We (I) are/am very happy and content with the arrangement we agreed to but I can tell you that any issues we experience are when we have tried to play with another couple. Before meeting couples we are very clear with our rules that I won’t touch another female but every time in the moment the other female ends up unhappy as she’s not getting the same level of attention as my wife. Based on that we are sticking with guys who want to play.

couplers , You are right about all of us just being one data point. We are also a data point moving in time. Because this is an old thread , it would be very interesting to hear from some of the posters as to how the past decade is affected their opinions.

My GF will tell you both. Each one has their own place. My GF loves one on one sex but she also loves gangbangs. She can have sex every single day one on one but she can't have a gangbang every single day. That doesn't mean she prefers one on one, MFM, or gangbangs. It's just that she likes the variety. But having MFM or gangbangs every day is not as sustainable as having one on one sex regularly.

This is an old thread that I've never seen before, and I'm surprised how many people think that nonmonogamy must be symmetric between the couple. We certainly didn't start that way, nor end up that way. We are just one data point, but we started with me having a husband and boyfriend while they were monogamous. After several years, with my encouragement, hubby played with a number of women while boyfriend was monogamous with me and I stuck with him and hubby. Although we have now settled into a poly family with two other women (with us women having a shared, married boyfriend whose wife knows), there has been non symmetric playing along the way. There are reasons why swinging is naturally asymmetric - men have a higher sex drive (usually) but women can absorb much more sex. You never hear of a male gangbang. Men usually like to watch their wife having sex with another man more than the reverse. Women are more likely to be bi. As long as it's consensual, go for it.

We haven’t been with many others because we enjoy the ones we first swapped with. There are more that we have been with, some memorable, some forgettable. I don’t know if I want to remember every detail, just the memorable times. I still refer to our first, my first as my Other Lover. The first time with a woman I just wanted to forget, it wasn’t something I needed to do or wanted to do. Years later I have labeled her My Lesbian Lover. I wish I journaled that first time with them as memories fade or change as we age.

I agree. Much fun!

Hysterical. We have our own way of rating that is more inline with what our intentions were when meeting them. As strange as it may be sexual prowess is not a top concern. Two characteristics stand out on first meeting, ease of conversation and friendliness. We are aware both of these are difficult to rate for those who never met others specifically for sex. Appearance is also important in a clean well kept way not in a beauty way. From a sex side we have notes of how our meeting progressed. Most of our meetings are based on the woman’s wants of exploration so our comments are more woman based and how she reacts and gives back and our remarks might offend others reading. I won’t say that dicks aren’t rated and part of the overall rating, of course the men are important and every woman appreciates great sex.

Do you give your entries a rating system?? (this one was five dicks up!)

That is why many post on here. Each time I post I relive the meeting with a smile. Reading together we have fun in that we don’t always remember meetings the same way, we can’t have the same experience.

What a great fun idea to keep track of our new found friends. Maybe a spread sheet with rankings. What we found is we have different thoughts on some of the people which is most likely because she is with the men and me with the women. Oh not 100% she is with women too. When I read this post I asked her who were the best of the new friends. I was thinking sex and she thought who were the nicest. Funny where our brains take us.

To answer your question not all single men are absolutely clueless idiots, but about 99.5 percent of them seem to be! In the ten plus years we have been in this lifestyle we have had exactly one threesome with another man and that is not, because we don’t give them a chance. You always hear how single women are the unicorns, but yet we have been able to find a fair amount of them in that same time frame. For us the real unicorn seems to be attractive, in shape, respectful men that actually get it. I honestly never would have thought that it would be so hard to find a guy like that to have incredible non commitment sex with my sexy lady, but it is. Maybe if some of these clowns actually did a little research on what women and couples really like and want instead of getting all their ideals from porn there would be a better chance for them.

I have read notes my wife keeps on our shared computer with her knowledge. Some notes are very brief, others can be very graphic bordering on pornography. At first I didn’t know who, what or where she was meeting, we both were open that we did meet others, keeping secretive the details. Then we had an honest talk and expanded to playing together as well as alone. I don’t keep a diary that I could share , I did give her my password to emails. I also made a picture file that she has the password to. Reading and sharing is extremely sexy even if I question the why she meets some of the men she does. She has questioned my choices, that’s when I answer for both of us. Sex.

It sounds like you took the act of frivolous sex, which is fun, and added homework to it. 🤣

I have been in a handful of MFM's and have done DP in all but two. Last night I was playing with a great couple and we did a DP with both cocks in her pussy. This was a first for me and I LOVED it. Did I mention it was GREAT?? LOL It really surprised me as when I was fingering her I would have never guessed that there was room in there for two guys. This is not something for a homophobic guy to try!

OK, from a lady's point of view. What I enjoy about a MFM threesome...having four hands roam all over my body...being able to have one man eating my pussy, while another one fondles and sucks my nipples...being done doggy style while lying over another man who is sucking on my clit while I am sucking his dick. Double penetration love that one...it's great being totally surrounded by two hard male bodies. Honestly I have not found anything I don't enjoy about being in a MFM threesome...the total adoration of two men is indescribable not to mention the power trip I get by being able to please two men at once and it's just soooo naughty

What is it you liked best about your MFM encounter(s)? We've only had one, but I think I can safely say Mrs. Alura liked me licking her clit while the other guy fucked her from behind best.