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Amber, when my wife and I first got into swinging, she wasn't entirely comfortable with me having sex with other women. We did do some soft swapping, and that went ok, but we didn't do much of it. She just wasn't ready for it really. You're having an emotional reaction to a situation that logic says is selfish. Emotion <> logic. They don't speak the same language and they don't understand each other at all. Neither is right, neither is wrong. What is right is what works _for you_. I'll differ (with respect) to some who posted above; I don't ascribe it to being selfish. After a couple of years, my wife began feeling more comfortable with the concept of me playing with other women. We ventured down that path, and we've done that, but stayed mostly with MFM or her playing solo. She's had two long term boyfriends that turned out quite well for some years. I was happy to go along with how she felt, and keep our communication 100% open. She is now comfortable with me having sex with other women. She's not turned on by it, it doesn't do anything for her, but she's comfortable with it. I, on the other hand, get very turned on by her having sex with other men whether I am there or not. I prefer being there, but it's also hot for her to come home and tell me about her evening while we have sex. Getting here took time and patience. There are some here who feel an asymmetrical setup doesn't work, and is a recipe for disaster. I don't disagree with them for some couples. But, for us being asymmetrical worked out very well. We've been swingers now for 14 years. Our relationship is stronger than ever.

Michael and I continue to see a therapist both together and separately. Over the years we have both become more open to telling her what experiences and feelings we have with others and the reasons we enjoy others. I will never know what he tells her in his private sessions though I am very open in our joint meetings. We have told her that we post some of our experiences on a swingers site, it’s more me posting, Michael doesn’t post anymore. She asked if I embellish my posts because many post on sites about fantasies more than realities. I think I post real feelings as best as I can but I know what she means that posting has an excitement factor like reliving an event. Others will post something they wished they did almost as if they did it. Michael and I were very hesitant to open up to our therapist our alternative lifestyle thoughts when we first met her. I opened up first in my private meetings and then only in a broad way with no specific acts. I didn’t think she would understand what we were doing or how she would judge me. Therapy was to take away my odd feelings which ended up adding to my thinking my actions were odd. Once getting over my fears of opening up my deep thoughts it has freed up anxiety of enjoying. I think I have a healthier outlook now that I have freed myself of worrying what others think and what a therapist thinks. Our joint sessions are now very freeing allowing me to express my feelings to Michael and understanding his feelings. How open are others? Do others discuss true feelings to a partner? Are you honest to a therapist?

Question: Is swinging right for me and my partner? ( Asked at chat.OpenAI.com/chat ) Answer: The number of sexual partners someone should have is a personal decision and should not be based on societal expectations or norms. What's most important is that any sexual activity is safe, consensual, and respectful to all parties involved. Sexual health and behavior are highly personal and individualized. People make choices based on their own beliefs, values, experiences, and comfort levels. The only "right" number of sexual partners is the one that feels comfortable and fulfilling for each individual person. It's also important to keep in mind that the number of sexual partners someone has does not define their worth or value as a person. Ultimately, it's up to each individual to determine what's best for them when it comes to their sexual health and behavior.

No. There is too much evidence to the contrary.

Ethical slut, yeah. Just a slut, no

You say insecurity shouldn’t be an issue then why would you have a problem with him getting the same thing you are?

So you're into cuckolding in all but name. If you're both into it, that's absolutely fine. He may enjoy seeing you with another man more than he would enjoy another woman for himself. So there's no real fairness problem to address. Some folks are just wired that way.

Thank you your reply has helped We are new to it It originally started as he desired to see me with someone else as this excites him and I've always been honest that seeing him with another woman does not excite me However at 1 club there was touching and I was OK with that and went with flow This weekend when a woman sucked him off I got upset I agree and understand now that boundaries need to be set I know I sound like a self centred bitch and that's last thing I want We seem quite new to this compared to others and I love the thrill of it. We adore each other so insecurity shouldn't be a issue and he says what happens at the club stays at the club I want a future doing this I love the dressing up ready for it and always aim to look good as does he I was hoping someone would have some advice if they had been in similar situation

Thank you for reinforcing my self-image among those here who matter.

You said it yourself twice and PeterJ confirmed it for you - For now at least, you play and your husband doesn't, since you are both good with that. Just make sure that the circumstances are what your husband enjoys: he's there (or not), he watches (or not), he participates (or not), you don't do any acts he feels are off limits, and you give him everything he wants afterwards. And don't be surprised if you change your mindset at some later time.

The way forward is for you to allow your husband to be with other women if that’s what he wants. Now if he’s content to *not* do that while you screw other men … fine, because it’s HIS decision. But your unwillingness to allow him the same freedom you want for yourself is the epitome of self-centeredness … something that doesn’t work *at all* in the Lifestyle. If you can’t give him that freedom, then you need to stop what you’re doing now!

What MrMrsswinger said …

Your selfishness is stunning. It's been all about more cocks for you but a woman gives a quick suck and you're distraught and end the activities... Same advice here as a few other threads about jealousy. Stop swinging. You want whatever you desire and flip when your husband gets the same thing? This goes nowhere good.

Ever fall asleep then wake up still inside her? (She was on top.) One of my best college memories.

Playing with another couple. His gf passed out. My wife and i, and him, were still up. So my wife took us both on. He had necer given anal, wife loves it. So ahe let him fuck her in her ass, while she sucked me. He came in her ass. We then switched places. I entered her ass just as his cum started to drip out. I fucked her ass, lubricated with his cum. I came so haed. When i pulled out, so much cum flowed out. She went to bed for avout an hour. We sat up. Playing with ourselves obviously still ready to go. So we got her up. She laid on him while he entered her pussy, i fucked her ass. We both came at about the same time in both holes. So much cum in onne tired and satisfied girl. Anyone in colorado want to play?