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We will admit that we do not often respond to messages sent to us! Sometimes it is, because the person who sent it clearly did not bother reading our profile before they message us. Maybe it is the people that have no pictures on their profile, only have pics of one of the couple, the cock pic losers or the people that direct the message at her and not us. All these things we make super clear are not going to get a response and may just get you blocked. We also sometimes just do not bother responding if we are not interested! The reason for this is, because there are just far too many people that get butt hurt if you say no thanks you are not what we are looking for. Can’t tell you how many times we have had insults and even threats thrown at us simply for saying we are not interested. The latest one was a couple that messaged us first interested in meeting. When we said we are not interested their response was you guys would have been a down grade anyways. Thought this was funny considering they messaged us fist. We have also been threatened to be beat up in the past by goofs that didn’t like hearing no. It has become clear to us over the years that some people are just not cut out for this lifestyle. If you can’t realize that attraction matters and not everyone finds the same things attractive then you should just not bother.

In our instance we end up letting a number of messages go unanswered, even if we would be potentially interested for reasons that are probably non-traditional. Specifically, when we started getting into the lifestyle we were both very excited and would reply to everything and later have disagreements or even arguments over who we ended up engaging. We've now made it a policy not to engage anything until we've both had the opportunity to see a profile and discuss it, which avoids misunderstandings and keeps things positive. The only issue with that is that we don't discuss lifestyle stuff every day or even week and by the time we've both seen something it the message/opportunity may have slipped through the cracks.

After I've cum, I'm often too sensitive for additional stimulation, but the wife and I have made a game of sort of finishing on our sides and trying to keep me 'docked' inside her in spoon position. When done right I stay hard enough to remain inside her as we both come down from our orgasms and lightly nod off. This usually ends with her gripping her pussy down on me a for a few minutes later to coax my interest back, me flexing into her pussy until she starts responding and humping back or in a few instances us actually passing out for an hour or more with me still docked inside. One time I recall waking up just in time to deliver a second creampie... apparently she had been doing some serious keegles on my dick and managed to get me off without me waking till the last second.

Great point! Both people in the couple should look at the message and profile together before deciding if it is someone they are both interested in. More than a little sure many guys specifically jump the gun before even consulting their wife to see if she is interested as well. Then a bunch of time is wasted chatting only for her to finally come along and say not interested at all. In most couples the woman is going to be the one who is more selective, because they can be with the hoards of men throwing themselves at them. As I like to say the pussy has the power in this lifestyle. God knows that pisses off all the alpha dom men out there.

When we first posted we felt the necessity of answering because it was the proper thing to do. We didn’t want negative posts about us chasing others away. We learned that there were more messages from those we had no attraction to or felt phony. I have mentioned in the past that the very first meeting was made based on a physical attraction and the thought they would never show up. I am not sorry we met them even if it wasn’t ideal because it broke the ice. It also made us think about all the real couples who like us were being scammed because of their innocence. The last thing a person who is nervous about what they were thinking of doing needs is some idiot to ruin that first n

You made me think that I have been ignorant about what the combinations meant. I thought FMF and FFM were the same as well as MMF and MFM. Now I see the real meanings. Wait until I tell Alan that he never did MMF. Now it all makes sense.

I think you covered all the bases here. Great post!

I'm going to grant the premise that the wife is actually open to this, and not just talking to try to seem cool. This all seems like good advice. We played this way regularly with a good friend of Mrs. E's for a while through the pandemic, less regularly now. They're gym buddies and being used to seeing each other in the locker room made it a lot less weird for them to get started, I think. Try 5mg of Cialis the night before and 5mg the morning of. Sitting between them on the couch and letting them independently explore works to get started. Simultaneous oral and intercourse works. Letting them take turns riding you while you make out with/caress the other for foreplay, until they tire themselves out, works. Take some husbandly initiaitve and lead your wife through the uncomfortable moments, but let her gatekeep what does and does not happen. There's a good chance that if she's into this, it's because, just like a man who wants straight MFM, she has complicated jealousy/exhibition/even control fantasies that she's just scratching at, and she should feel safe nudging for what she wants to see and pushing back on what she doesn't without having to be rude. Sometimes, your wife might find out she just likes to watch. It doesn't hurt to have a bottle of wine (nothing stronger) and some icewater on the nightstand so the odd lady out can feel like she's attending to herself when she's resting.

 Imagination……that’s the key. Sorry for the length of this (I could write a book) but I felt a more in-depth discussion was in order because there is very little realistic playbook style guidelines. First, there is a matter of designation that gets many off on the wrong foot. MFM is two men for one woman without any direct sexual contact between the males (MMF designates some level of sexual contact between the two men while most the attention is focused on the woman) but for a good experience for the woman there will be some close proximity, brushing/bump up against, you cant be shy…..or homophobic or she will not have as good experience as she should. If one guy sits back while the other does his thing then swap out it really is not a MFM……taking turns….tag team…..can be fun too. The same follows with FMF as opposed to FFM. You can see what could happen if you list the wrong thing in your Bio, profile or search description. It is also very important to discuss in detail activity that is desired, activity that is optional/situational as well as no interest and hardline musts and no go/stop activities. This would include before, leading up to, during, finishing and after activity/after care. This would apply to either activity….or any activity in the lifestyle. You will also need a verbal…yes verbal safe word that is recognizable for slow down….stop. As in MFM….FMF there are so many variations on the theme. The first time can be awkward….the first several times can be awkward…..segmented, and over with in a matter of moments. We have learned over time that unlike shopping for extra males looking for that extra woman can be very elusive at best. The most successful has always been with other couples that you meet and have later become very comfortable with both in and out of the bedroom. The more comfortable you are with each other the more open discussion that can/will happen. The boundaries are all what the four of you discuss and/or expand on. Between the foursome planned activities and sexual exploration becomes in time a matter of open discussion and semi planned activity with backup incase it might be needed. Depending, there are now two women and two men. Things can shift if need be, one watches to recoup etc. We have enjoyed several dozen experiences this way that ended with full afternoons and evenings of highly enjoyable sex play with lots of breaks…and start again. Some general activity with two women FMF (just as with MFM) include but not limited to: - FMF tag team, one at a time, each has a turn, one at a time, sexually female dominate male passive, the two share male as a living play toy for them, how long can male last/endure, who finishes the male. Recovery for more? Or one and done? - FMF more inclusive, two women simultaneously share the male (still passive) as sex toy each performing sexual activity at same time on the male swapping back and forth. One performing oral while the other is kissing or presenting her breasts at the same time. This can be an overload for some males causing early ejectulation or the very common lost erection due to sensory over load. - FMF same as either above but male is more aggressively active trying to please both women either one on one or inclusively. Much more challenging for the male and usually will require the male to have better control/endurance or continued sexual interest activity until recovered and hard again. I personally prefer this last type of activity. Longer play period, lots of exploration. Allows for many oral activity positions, penetration and oral from male to both females simultaneously. My personal favorite….scissoring one woman with PIV penetration and slow thrusting. Allows for her to stimulate herself manually/vibrator while I give oral to the second woman…..and then swap. Ideally we keep edging each other….and possibly for the ladies more orgasms. If they make me cum I continue on using toys, fingers, mouth etc you get the picture. We have enjoyed a heart number of all afternoon or all evening play…with breaks…and then continue on. When done as a foursome MFMF activity and all are equally on bored you can use your imagination as far as all the possible variables.

I had a girlfriend who wanted us to fall asleep with me inside of her. It never quite worked out, though we tried a few times. When I was ~20, I was able to cum and keep right on going. It was sometimes way sensitive, but I was able to push past it and keep going. My girlfriend at the time really enjoyed it. Now, decades on...forget it. Mr. Happy does his bit, says thanks for the ride, and promptly checks out.

I think there’s only one person who can change the way you feel about yourself! Swinging often works very well for giving people and usually doesn’t end well for those who just take. Maybe it’s not for you

Truth be told though if it was a husband playing with other women and not liking his wife playing with other men people would be all over you about it being unfair, how selfish it is and how you can do better then that. There are double standards for sure in this lifestyle. I am sure there are lots of people out there that would have no issue at all playing with a woman that is cheating, but would not do it if it was a husband cheating. In fact we have had tons of couples try to hit her up to play alone even though it is clear on our profiles that we only play together. They get told to go fuck themselves and blocked. Although I honestly don’t care if I ever have sex with another woman again other then her I know I wouldn’t be to happy about double standards being in place and they are not.

1) As the man in a straight FMF, you need to perform oral well while in another pussy. 2) Learn to hold off your orgasm until both women are satisfied. Some guys are good at backing off, others are not. 3) Figure out what gets you back up quickly. Usually oral on the guy works, but the woman has to like sucking a sloppy dick.

Obviously the two of you haven't talked enough about this or he would have had a better idea what the limits were. If Mrs. and and myself were playing in a club (with or without others being involved) and a woman came in and started sucking my cock WITHOUT ASKING FIRST (and we NEVER do anything with someone else without asking permission first), I would stop her and let her know that she needs to ask permission of both me and Mrs. Gold. If we both gave permission, THEN she could continue (however by not asking in advance, even I would probably tell her no). Question: Who brought up the idea of swinging? It sounds to me like you are doing this for him knowing he enjoys watching you with other guys (just a guess here). As mentioned, maybe hotwifing will be your thing. No matter what the outcome is, you need to set better limits and stick with them, keeping in mind that the limits can be changed as time goes on. Good luck and let us know how things go.

Ever fall asleep then wake up still inside her? (She was on top.) One of my best college memories.