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You need to tell her you and your wife are swingers, and that your wife is completely onboard with her being around. Stop being dishonest.

The US is rapidly slipping into oblivion. Legislating moral values NEVER works and usually harms one or more segments of society. The attack on women we are seeing now is depressing and immoral, not to mention an affront to the constitution and equal rights. COVID has made it worse, in that people think they have a right to tell others how to behave. Politicians and organizations pitting one person against another is a powerful tool and we humans have fallen for it hook line and sinker.

Kink!! One person's norm might be kink to us? Actually Wu thinks some things that I find pleasant like urethral stim and anal and cross dressing kind of weird and kinky and I sure was aghast early in our marriage when she wanted to have sex where we could be watched, but today I don't think that's so kinky at all! Perception changes with experiences and time?

Usually it is just me, I am retired, and K is a registered nurse. With the nursing shortage, K mostly works and sleeps!☹

Our first swinging experience was my ex wife's maid of honor and her boyfriend watching us have sex and them joining in the middle of it. The maid of honor went through several different men yet we continued to swing no matter what man she was with and it eventually became just her as a threesome.

The only men who evacuated while flaccid with me were going for a second, third or fourth time, and like most men the amount is never the same after going a few times. I was very very recently with a divorced man, alone for a first time meeting with both of us going to work in the morning. Michael knew where I was and was waiting for me at the hotel 6:30 AM. Our first time went the way new meetings would go, he was erect without any help from me and we had a very nice session ending with him going soft after evacuating. I then got him erect again and orally took care of him, he didn’t hesitate to reciprocate even though I hadn’t cleaned up. We both fell asleep after freshening up until he woke me up with an erection behind me. I can’t say how big his ejaculation was but I was happy with him. Number 4 was in the shower, not fully erect and my oral fun had him get something out.

Be honest with both women then ask what they would like to do. For your sake I hope they don't toss you aside and just get with one another.

Daniela had a lover, a married guy, (again, before we met) who could never get it up. His sex life at home was non-existent. His wife wouldn't do oral on him even to try to get him up. Daniela would and make him cum. She says he ejaculated a normal amount still staying flaccid. Eventually, she got him on ED meds and everyone was happy, including his wife. It seems that my wife has a story for like every occasion.

No chance. The last time we saw each other was...shall we say...tense. He also lives quite some distance away. Ironically, part of the reason we parted as friends had to do with his approach to polyamory, and his inability to see how he was totally &*#(@$&# it up.

Something not every woman can understand, oral on a flaccid penis. I don’t expect all women to enjoy everything I enjoy just like I don’t enjoy all the things others do. I never had any man stop me from giving oral, erect or flaccid.

I don't like it. If you're going to be a cheater, cheat. If you're going to be a lifestyler, be open and honest.

If she knows about your wife, why didn't you tell her that both of you are swingers. If you get both in bed with you, do you think they will enjoy each other sexually? If you do pull this off and get both together in bed with you on vacation, how are you going to feel next time you go on vacation and your wife wants to bring a man on vacation to share a bed with you and your wife? What's good for the goose is good for the gander, right?

Wouldn't it work the other way around too? When Red or David has been totally spent from recent activity and couldn't get erect again, we women have been able to get them to another orgasm while flaccid with oral. Not easy for them, but doable, and fun for us. Barely a drop of cum.

My suggestion would be to take only a half step in that direction the first time, so as not to shock her. Ask her to imagine it is cock of someone real, but not a real possibility - a celebrity, an athlete - a fantasy. You can later bring up people you know. Encourage her to identify the men, ones that she likes. I don't know how common it is, but no guy would turn down a blow job. Just make sure that the rules are clear all around, including the big one, whether he can cum in her mouth. Set the rules all around, including to both of them, "No fucking, no matter what I say in the heat of the moment." But my prediction as a woman who was extremely possessive of my husband and didn't want him to fuck other women is that you will get there. Thinking about it when you are not horny you will decide at the right time with the right guy your wife wants under the right circumstances it is the right thing to do. There will be two reasons: you want to please your wife and give her a wonderful gift with no expectations in return, and you will want to see it as well, a beautiful act. That is what I did, and no regrets, it is wonderful. Your English is very good.

Nobody is putting a needle in my dick unless my life or my penis itself is in mortal danger.

Since all six of you had already had sex with each other, it seems that the door had been opened. The play had not stopped, just moved to another venue. (With swings and everything!) No disrespect to your husband or anything, but it just seems like an overly rigid interpretation of the rules.

Our #1 rule in the lifestyle is 'any mistake that is innocently made is immediately forgiven'. We've both messed up on accident, in the heat of the moment going further than our rules really allow. We've never done anything that would put the other at risk (eg unprotected sex) and we've never done anything that was not, sincerely, a minor slip up. So, in your case it seems totally understandable how that mistake could happen and it doesn't seem like a big deal... I think he should be able to get past it

For sure lifestyle couples should discuss in advance how they will comport themselves when they are in sexual situations with others. And it’s important to identify activities that one or both are uncomfortable with and agree to avoid them. Essential to maintaining the level of trust that enables both to have a satisfying experience in the lifestyle. That said, I also find myself thinking that if in the middle of a great sex session you aren’t on the ragged edge of rationality and control, you might not be doing sex correctly…😉😊 From my perspective, given the situation you describe, this doesn’t seem like such a huge slip. But you report your husband is extremely upset. It makes me wonder if there’s some larger issue here. Just a thought.

We are and we do

I have lots of sex, but I've only had sex with five men in my life, three of them currently. Does that answer your question?

Both ways can work for me. I do enjoy sex with people I know (in the lifestyle); the familiarity of an existing connection is nice. On the other hand at parties I’ve had great fun with women I’ve met just minutes before. I try to remember their names and make sure to use it a couple of times early on in the play session. Unfortunately, over the course of a really strong experience it’s too easy for me sometimes to forget the name when I’m being overwhelmed with how good they fuck or suck. Which is embarrassing when my partner might have just a few minutes before swallowed my load. ? (I do wonder if there have been women who have been cuddling with me in our mutual post-orgasmic bliss and said to themself ‘’Gee, that guy was pretty good. I’m embarrassed I can’t remember his name..." ? )

My question wasn't totally clear, because I was asking more whether testicles are appreciated for their masculinity and excitement that arises from just seeing them, sort of like breasts are for a woman. For me it arises from being raised a sheltered Catholic girl hearing about a guy "having balls" (or "NOT having balls"), someone being a "ballbuster," a guy "getting his nuts cut off," or having "the balls of a bull," all those sayings. That part of a guy took on mythical dimensions in my pubescent teenage mind. When I masturbated it was in my mind, and still is. And the first time I got to hold the real testicles of the guy that took my virginity (and is my current boyfriend), they were (and are) of mythical proportions. So I have never shaken my schoolgirl fascination with that part of a man's anatomy. I like to see them, and it is a secret pleasure of mine to watch them as hubby or boyfriend is orgasming.

You know you are getting old when you have to hold your balls up when sitting down so as not to sit on them.

IF S is into the guy or the couple and I can at least get it up then ya we can play and I will take one for the team you could say. I know that if he doesn't excite her at all it wont happen no matter what. D

Well, I guess you're right. I'm a woman and I like to get to know people first. That being said...there were a couple of experiences in my much, much, much....and even a few more "much's" ... younger years. Memories.... -EBF

We have found that the sex is better with people that we know. This is just our preference. Others may feel differently, but each to their own. Jesse