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After registering on Ashley Madison we continued to check on our other profile which had a message left for us by someone we know. We never saw their profile in our searches so were surprised and frightened to see their profile picture when we clicked. We know them on what we would label a Hi, how are you basis. They are usually with others when we see them in a few local bars and now we were searching for those friends profiles. Mike and I responded in a very funny way, What are you doing here? We only thought of them as very vanilla socially active friendly, not lifestylers. Their response was a cell number so Mike called. Some very funny laughing conversation with a meeting set, we met them without their crowd of friends. Our conversation started with us telling them some of our history and them sharing theirs. I asked about which of their friends play but they were silent. That was a plus for us.

Deeply sorry to see this. People come and go from forum life and so often we never find out why and assume the best, but it's always worth sparing a thought for them and for wherever they might be. Hope he found peace with Laura.

Alas, the arrow of time moves in one direction and points towards our individual and collective end. Alura touched many of us. We will remember him for his love of Laura and for his courage soldiering on after she died. We will honor him with gratitude for today in the face of an indeterminate tomorrow.

A tip we were given years ago, there is nothing wrong if you meet those you know in a swinging situation, they are no different than you. You are both open and they want their privacy as you want yours. Life is short, meet them if you are interested.

When I was in college I had bi friends and knew lesbians. The lesbians had male friends but as far as I know they had no interest in sex with the guys. I went “straight” when I met Alan and remained monogamous for years and then one day I agreed to allow him to watch me and another woman. We found many woman suppressed a curious side, some their desires and some for their husbands. Most of those we met were hesitant to explore on their own which why we tried to make it fun.

When we made our first online profile we quickly discovered a couple we know who live just a block away. They are the types who put their faces right on their public profile (we don't). In the interest of fairness we reached out and said "Hi" although never played with them bc they're not our type. We are friends now and they are a valuable source of local swing-scene info and gossip 😀

Our poly family life has been mundane for a while. Fulfilling and satisfying for certain, but nothing wild going on. Well, two weeks ago I took a step in an interesting direction. I was at a conference and caught up with a guy, Joe, who I had met in the past and found interesting and attractive. We ended up having dinner together, taking a lot of pleasure in one another’s company. At one point I had my hand on the table and he placed his hand on top. I turned my hand over so we could clasp. He is married, having spoken of his wife previously and knew that I was married as well, but not about my whole poly situation. There came a point where I seized the situation and told him very directly that I would sleep with him, but his wife would have to be there. Later, I corrected myself and said that although I preferred it, she didn’t have to be there but would need to know and approve to me directly. Joe didn’t reply except to ask if my husband needed to approve. I said no, that you’re the one wearing the wedding ring, not me, I only need to tell my husband. We had already been talking about sexual topics, so Joe asked if my husband allowed me to play around. I said that I don't do that, and reminded him that his wife had fucked three to four times more guys before they married than I had my entire life, so who's the slut here? (Who doesn't know exactly how many sex partners their spouse has had and talked about it?) In discussing women in general, and his wife in particular, I also told him that I had a Lesbian side. He didn't respond. As we went back to our rooms, I joined him on the elevator and had him get off on my floor and walk me to my room. I opened the door but stood there blocking any entrance. He was standing back and I pulled aside my jacket, unbuttoned my blouse several buttons and exposed my left breast. He cupped it in his hand and we kissed deeply for several minutes before I disengaged and told him that when he gets home to lovingly fuck his wife and have crazy sex while thinking of me. I said good night, and he left. When away from home, I often masturbate at night before sleeping, but this was particularly intense, fingers inside for one orgasm and then the handheld shower pulsing on my clit for the second. The day after I got back, Joe called me and politely went between how delightful a time he had at dinner and hoping he hadn’t done anything untoward. I said that I felt the same. I stressed that regardless of the way things go between us that I wanted to meet his wife, and not to worry - I wasn’t going to say anything about what we had done or might do without his prior approval. I pretty much ordered him to bring her next time we could arrange our paths to cross. He could also call or text me on my cell at home, no problem worrying about my husband. Also the day after I got home, after the kids were tucked in, I got hubby, Red, Clair, and Lora together and told what I had done. Their reaction was what I had expected, but more so. First, they were surprised that despite being so attracted that I didn’t fuck him, but also they did believe me that I hadn’t. Second, unlike our usual splitting up for the night as our moods dictate, we all went into one bedroom. It was intense with me in the middle of it all. The next morning the reality set in for us that what I had done was, as David called it “schoolgirl making out,” and there would likely be nothing more coming from it. I kept this post short, but feel free with any questions or comments.

Sad news! Always enjoyed reading his posts and always had great advice. Fuck Cancer.

Sad for us that remain, lovely for him to pass onto the next realm with his dear wife.

We have met, got to know and be friends with lesbian and guy men couples and solo over the years. In most lifestyle events gay men are not so welcome….or made to feel comfortable attending a mostly hetero swing/lifestyle event. But we have experienced a few. hetero couples and singles can be curious, explore and enjoy their bi side within swinger party’s/activities/events….it only stands to reason that there are those who are not hetero, emotionally and physically prefer same gender relationships but like to enjoy, explore and enjoy their bi side. Which can be a spectacular experience if you ever are blessed to be part of it.

I’m deeply saddened by this news, though not totally surprised. Al and I communicated sometimes via the email function here. we had mutual interests outside the erotic realm. Lovely guy who made great contributions to the board. (I must say that a good of the joy went out of his life after Laura died, but he treasured their memories.

Looking back on some of the comments it seems we are getting abit of heat on the situation, first off though after speaking on this building to it and doing it it puts a little downer that people think it’s just fake or been deceitful! Wow thanks for that one! this was a experience like nothing we had ever had before it was very nervous one and also amazing one, also the choice for us to play bareback is ours, I get there’s a risk factor to it but so does everything in life so on this experience yes my wife had hot sex with a stranger and yes it ended up bareback as all involved were willing and happy to do so

While attending a vanilla benefit with a wide range of friends we gathered with a number of lifestyle friends, current and past. Many we are still in contact with…..some we still share with. A few we had not seen in several years due to distance or life changes. It was all grand. The benefit was a success and social reconnection with old friends current and past was the Diamond of the evening. We all gathered at a local home of one couple for catching up…reminiscing, stories, reminiscing on past adventures and more current, promises of keeping in touch….getting together etc. And no it did not evolve…not even close…..to any sort of play party. It was spectacular. The changes in life….not just physically….or age….but the interesting turns and changes in life, relationship, work and family. As some start to drift away to head home there were about 16 - 20 of us left. More flash back open/descriptive talk about events/experiences of the past, parties, events, themes, solo, group play etc. the oldest there almost eighty (this year and still active in their community in Florida) youngest couples/singles early 40’s. Always a mix of people at our party/events core group now age 55-65. The things we talked about…work, family, kids, grand kids…….finances, living arrangements. Living arrangements being probably the third most talked about….and changed….in most cases added to. 8-10 poly like living arrangements out of our group alone. Interesting. Surprisingly not any one in this group had a divorce from their spouse since we met them in the lifestyle some two plus decades ago (yes some were currently on marriage two at that time) a few sadly lost their spouse to illnesses. The most discussed, shared and stories told……themed and destination events that we set up……that were not sex play based….more social. Yes stories were told of specific memories of wonderful shared time, group play etc. But the dinners, trips, music festivals etc were warmly embraced. The most laughed about, cat called, teased……and astonishing? Kat……a friend for many years…..Lesbian Dom bi situational (yes they do exist) managed to start an interesting twist that had everyone operating the calculator app on their phone. It started small…..a few of the ladies standing together with howls of laughter and oh my gods! Apparently, Kat introduced a definition to discover how bi or lesbian a woman was by how much semen she has accepted in her sexual lifetime. Either topically, internally or orally. After a blow up of laughter she was made to share and it went down hill from there, very quickly. Seems she takes the average semen at male ejaculation (.3 tsp to 1.5 tsp) of 1 teaspoon full times the average or quantity of sex where you accepted semen on you, inside you or orally. Hhmmmm. So the big number that got all the howling from the ladies…….my Queen. We have always been highly sexual with each other….since 20 and married we easily had sex twice a day until just recently the last two to three years we are more once a day with the occasional 2 - 3 special on a weekend or with a friend 🤩 . So some fast math…….using her average as it only involved us….. sexually active married couple, married 45 years, sex twice a day on average (does not include multiples or lifestyle participation, that could add over 20 in a single day party) 365 X 2 = 730 ejaculations in a year. Times 45 years of activity…….32,850 ejaculations…….I’m starting to feel very exhausted……..now it gets interesting….. so average male ejaculate equals 1 teaspoon. That’s 32,850 teaspoons………..wait there’s more……….there is 738 teaspoons in a gallon….. wait for it…….. 44.51 gallons…………. Damn Queenie………… a standard tub is around 30 gallons……a 10 minute shower 20-25 gallons……. oh, and Kat’s number………well under a gallon……she is very picky lol

Never heard of plum smuggler but now I can picture it. On our Jersey beaches the bathing suits are getting smaller every year and Mike will point out camel toes and we laugh at the women who shouldn’t be wearing those bathing suits. On the other hand he laughs at me searching for Italian Sausage. On the days we go to Gunnisons there is no Camel Toe and instead of seeing a sausage package I call them Hanging Kielbasa.

I've always enjoyed when a woman does that unexpectedly during a blowjob. One particularly memorable occasion at a swing club with a random couple we met that night graduated to her clasping her hands and two index fingers together at her waist and getting behind me and mimed fucking me. She surely enjoys pegging but didn't have the equipment on hand. I thoroughly enjoyed that but I could certainly see that being a problem with people who have hangups.

Should wear a glove or at least a finger cot and lube all of which remove the unexpected. I do enjoy a mutual bare digits experience in a roomy shower with lots of Rainbath or similar mild lubricating soap, great times!

Yes, all but the "unexpectedly" part. I think a good swing partner, or spouse for that matter, doesn't do something like that unexpectedly during sex. A favorite swing partner was really into this and veeeery good at it and it led to some mind-blowing orgasms.

Clair has said that with some Lesbians there is pressure on others not to explore their straight side. A girl who has never had a dick in her is called a "Gold Star Lesbian." Clair was at first, but then discovered she liked men as well. Fortunately for all of us.

Interesting. In 25 years of swinging we have encountered a few gay male couples who swing but never a lesbian couple. But since a big part of swinging is about pushing boundaries and trying new things then why not? Q: did the lesbian couple play with the husbands at your AirBnB?

Trying to give thought to this, two people in love marry whether in the traditional heterosexual sense or in the very now excepted same sex way. A homosexual, male or female, finds an attraction to one sex for a loving relationship and does not preclude getting pleasure from the other sex. The difference between be bisexual and being homosexual and being able to have sex with the other sex is interesting. Unlike Ms. McCray it doesn’t sound that these women have “gone straight”, they are just enjoying a freedom to be sexual.

Saturday David got a surprise call from Shannon. As I mentioned before, when I told Shannon that she could talk to David about him being ok with me having sex with him/them, I offered for her to call David to confirm it was consensual all around. There was a “password” I told her that he would immediately say (“I heard you had a nice dinner.”) to show that he was ready to discuss the subject. If she was still feeling uncertain, in response she should say, “Petra says you are open for her to have an adventure.” She did and David said, “It’s good with me if Pet has sex with you two,” and it went from there. David and I went into a quiet room and he put his phone on speaker while changing locations, but I didn’t talk. Shannon said that was generous for him to offer (hey, what about my generosity?), however, she “doesn’t do that anymore,” but she found our life and his offer interesting. Shannon said she hoped that we all can get together sometime, and David agreed. It's clear that both Joe and Shannon are up for playing, but neither is willing to put it to the other. Let me modify that – Shannon seems open to her fucking with me and maybe her playing with me and/or David, but I got the sense that Joe is not eager to have Shannon fuck another guy. It was thrilling to try, and I did because I am attracted to Joe, and after I met Shannon more so them as a couple. But it seems if one or more of us in our family is going to play, the chances are better with a single where the situation is less complicated.

Shannon did show up with Joe. This is a summary of the sexual highlights of the time we spent together since that’s the interest of those on the Swingersboard. There’s plenty of other topics we talked about, but those are more suited for travel, skiing, sailing, culinary, entertainment discussion boards, so I am leaving all of that out as well as the conference topics. Apologies in advance because I wrote this on the plane home, and decided to post it now instead of editing over the weekend. Saturday The hotel is a resort destination in itself, having a fitness center, heated pools, hot tubs, sauna, tennis, golf. Shannon didn’t bring a bathing suit, so we went shopping together. She found one she liked, I had her hand it to me, and while she wandered around the store, I paid for it. She was surprised and grateful; I was making a seductive move. When we were later all in the hotel pool, Shannon said that she had to use the lady’s room and I went with her. As we approached the stalls to go in, I pulled down a shoulder strap on my one-piece bathing suit to expose a breast as I had done for her husband last time. She didn’t avert her eyes, just continued talking. It was a thrill for me. (The reason I usually wear a one-piece bathing suit is because my hip bones will often hold the bottom of a two-piece away from my abdomen and under certain circumstances someone can look down at my pubes. Same problem with most tops, my small tits make it easy to look down at my nipples.) Joe drinks a little, and Shannon drinks a little more. I don’t drink but have learned to sip a little and sometimes make it disappear in other ways. After a while Shannon and I went off alone and spoke of many things. As we talked more and as Shannon got slightly inebriated, more relaxed, I asked about Joe, how they met, how long they had been together. Shannon told me about themselves, which was consistent with what Joe had told me. The topic turned to sex more generally and she said that she was both lucky and unlucky to have married Joe – he is a great husband, good provider, and she looked forward to having children with him. But she missed her wild earlier days starting in high school and continuing up until Joe and a little thereafter. In all, she said that she had numerous boyfriends and encounters, thirty-some different guys. (This is about twice the number of guys that Joe said she told him.) She also said that she had a few threesomes - “both kinds.” She said that she had sometimes slept with a man “just to get him out of my system.” She also told me she did the “girl-girl” thing. Not that she seeks it out but if another girl wanted it or if a guy wanted to watch, it was fun. She laughed and said she had licked way more pussy than Joe. I said cunnilingus is a woman’s art. Shannon said that her best times were after she moved out of an apartment that she shared with her boyfriend at the time and into a house with some other girls. They had a group of friends some of whom would visit, have sex, spend the night. Shannon said she liked to pick and choose among the guys. Sunday After brunch, we got back to the hotel. Shannon went to my room where she had left her bathing suit, while Joe went to their room. Following my lead, she got naked. Shannon is attractive, fit, cute blonde with youth on her side, like 27. The only odd thing is her breasts, they are not large, but slender cylinders and hang down without touching. Her nipples at the end that are as wide as the rest of her breasts. It isn’t noticeable when she’s wearing some support. She saw me looking, said, “I got strange tits,” and asked if I would like “to touch.” I didn’t hesitate and said, “Yes.” I cupped her one nipple at the end with my right hand and put my left hand nearly around her other breast, gently lifting and squeezing. After a minute, she retreated. I then said, “I have a strange cunt.” Shannon said no, that it’s like a flower. I guess you could maybe find a flower like that. To reciprocate, I asked if she wanted to explore. She didn’t say anything, but sort of clinically played with my tits, my abs, and my protruding hip bones. She reached around and grabbed my ass. I tightened my glutes, and she kept feeling and squeezing. I opened my thigh gap more to unfold my labia and expose my clit, and moved her hand down a little, but she didn’t take me up on my silent offer. Sunday evening after the opening conference session, Shannon called me while I was in my room. She asked about a cream that we had talked about and me having a tube of it with me that she could have. She asked if it would be ok if she sent Joe down to get it. “OK, sure.” I had only a robe on when he knocked. I opened the door then opened the robe. He moved his hands over me, we kissed deeply with his one hand on my tits and one in my pussy. After those two minutes (the only time we were alone that weekend) I handed him the cream, told him to leave and fuck Shannon for me. I was left wondering whether Shannon was very trusting of me, naïve, or was playing an interesting game. Monday In the late afternoon, Shannon had a few drinks while I had rum and Coke with no rum. That’s why I always went to get the drinks. She said that Joe has been talking about me a lot, and she thinks that he’s infatuated with me. I apologized if I had done anything wrong, but Shannon said no, it’s ok, it’s livened things up for them and that she has talked about me to him “positively” (implying sexually) as well. She said that Joe hasn’t had nowhere near the same extent of sexual experiences that she has had (just a few long-term girlfriends), and she thinks it is a good way of dealing with it. Shannon gets around to asking about my husband and family. I tell her part of the truth about David and the two children, the ones I bore, and leave out the rest. After what Shannon told me about her past, it was easy for me to tell her what I had told Joe – that I have only had sex with five men in my life, one being my husband. I told her I am sort of like your husband in the numbers game, but added that my husbands and boyfriends had lots of experience before we met so I’ve done just about everything. In my case, I said two men were before I married David but two were after - with hubby’s encouragement and approval. She was astounded. I didn’t disclose anything further. Shannon gently inquired further about the arrangement that I had with hubby. I didn’t dance around the topic and used the word “fuck,” telling her truthfully that I fucked two other guys before I got married and fucked two other men since then, which she could talk to my husband about it if she wanted. I left out the part that I am in a poly relationship, still regularly fucking two of those men in addition to my husband, and having Lesbian sex with two women. Later when the three of us were together, Shannon left the pool to get us more drinks while Joe and I were left at the side watching her walk away. “Nice ass,” I said. His hands were on the ledge and one of mine was too, but the other hand I slid down the front of his bathing suit as I watched Shannon walk toward the bar. He was full, but not hard. I asked him if he might cum. He said, “Maybe,” so I let go and said to save it and started feeling his balls. Individually. I have a testicle fetish and his pleased me. Tuesday Time was running short, so I skipped sessions in the late morning and early afternoon to spend more time with Shannon. She opened up again during lunch after a few drinks. Once again I tried to be seductive and see what the possibilities are by flattering her and Joe. How attractive and wonderful he is, and how attractive she is and lucky to get him. She repeated that finding good marriage material is a tradeoff with other things. She wished that they had some of the experiences that she had with previous men who weren’t marriage material. She wished he was a more experienced and adventurous lover. I took the opportunity and offered to be a safe answer to her wishes. You and Joe can do anything you want with me. Or have me do whatever you want. I would consider it an honor. “Wow, oh wow,” she said. Shannon was flattered but somewhat upset with my offer. While she wished that Joe could be more like her, me, and my husband; in that they had had fun while they were single “But we are married now. I have moved past that.” Quelle horreur! It was interesting when calling my family back home. David asked if I was having fun. Clair taunted me for trying and “getting neither dick nor pussy.” Lora said I should have just done it last trip when I was alone with Joe and could have been at it with him again now. Red said he loves me. Wednesday Joe, Shannon, and I met at the breakfast buffet (with an omelet chef, high class!) before the start of the final, morning session. I was a bit nervous about what Shannon’s demeanor would be (having told her the previous evening that I would be a sexual toy for them and wanted to fuck her husband), but she was extremely nice to me, sat next to me and briefly held my hand. Our flights were around the same time, so I offered them a ride to the airport since they had taken an Uber in while I had a rental car. At the airport as we parted, Shannon kissed me on the cheek while whispering in my ear that she wished she had met me sooner.

A quick update. Joe hasn’t forgotten me, he has texted and emailed me a number of times and even made several calls. He keeps telling me how much he thinks of me and I tell him that I’d like for us to get together, but it has to be with his wife’s knowledge and permission. This seems to have him flustered, but one big move he’s made - He called and said that he is ready to pull the trigger on registration, flights, and hotel for a conference in February. And his wife Shannon will be coming as well! I told him to hang on a moment and I got online and had windows open to register and get in the same hotel. Then we both pulled the trigger. It’s one of those moderately worthwhile events that’s in a nice place where one can justify arriving on Saturday for a Sunday (evening) start, then into the week. It’s odd, but as much as I am excited to see Joe again, I am more excited to meet his wife. I feel like the early days for me when I was getting friends and acquaintances to have sex with David. It is a reverse variation of my previous game of flattering her and the fact that she “caught” Joe, complimenting her and Joe, and see how she opens up. It’s a long shot but will be fun.

If any of the old goats on SB are still around, we've lost a legend. Al of Alura passed away on the 10th, joining his wife who passed some years before. Goddamned cancer! You may recognize Alura's name around here on some of the older posts, giving sage advice, and blessing us with his earthy sense of humour. I've enjoyed a years-long internet friendship with Al, and I will deeply miss our conversations. I always meant to get down to Oklahoma to meet him in person and regret that I never did. If anyone has memories to share, please do.

We are friends with a couple who were married as long as we were, about 35 years, had two children. Husband left wife for another man. Not swingers as far as we know.