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Among our circles of vanilla and LS friends, you would be hard pressed to find a lady who does not have a toy or two. The topic is no longer taboo; rather, it is a topic for cocktail party (if not dinner table) conversation. Walmart and Amazon, "where America shops", have an enormous selection. Just yesterday, work-wife was extolling the pleasures of her newly acquired clitoris-suction toy to wife-wife. To a degree of certainty, wife-wife will acquire one.

See the Wirecutter piece here: https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/reviews/best-vibrators/

Separate room play is something we've about a third of the time. For me, it's not about 'letting loose' more. It's about the guy letting loose. And they always do. :)

1. Toys are likely not returnable if used. If there is a mechanical problem on receipt, of course. 2. It's not just the strength of the vibrations, it's how you best position the head. Curvatures of the two heads is not the same. The smaller head and thus the tighter curvature makes it more natural to slide between Mrs. FL's labia at the top of the introitus against the exposed clitoris. Typically we'll start with some foreplay, I'll spend some time on cunnilingus (+/- 69), then she'll start with the Mini and enjoy three or four really strong orgasms, with my fingers or tongue assisting, and then we'll get on to the main event. Two tips: 1. Lay in a supply of your favorite lube. Your consumption will go up. If you don't currently use a particular lube, happy to offer advice, but know that you will need lube 2. Between natural secretions and lube, things get ...messy...fairly quickly. We keep a bunch of Liberator throws around the house--we use them for sit-ons when nude and for play--and they are really useful ensuring that no one is resting or sleeping in a wet spot. See https://www.liberatorstore.com/fascinator-throw.html . We were the couple that talked them into making the "mini" size, which we find is perfect for a lot of our needs. 3. There are a lot of eStim products out there. See the Aneros line for anorectal/prostate stimulators. It's a reliable line. We do not use them, but know couples that do. 4. Re: "Seniors going at it". Seniorhood is a great time of life. First, seniors are generally happier and more content than middle aged folks. Second, seniors often have more time to themselves. Third, seniors are a lot less concerned with body image. Fourth, seniors long in the LS have generally gotten past the health traps and the relationship traps. Sex is seen as fun, healthy, exercise, antidepressant, socially connecting. And, as you point out, the world view has changed. It's no longer "Ewww, old people kissing (or fucking). " Rather, it's "We want to be that couple, tell us how to get there!".

Thank you for your thoughtful response. It seems that your are correct that my perspective is formed by my lack of numerical experience. It makes sense in that context. I was originally thinking of a woman using a battery vibrator to achieve a first or perhaps second orgasm and thinking that it would take longer than the batteries would last. I must admit as well that we woman have on occasion had long oral sessions in pursuit of a follow-up orgasm. But still, I'm impressed that anyone would go that hard and long to achieve one more O instead of giving it a rest and going at it again later.

No one is more vanilla than my mom and guess what I found before I ever had sex? Her toys kept in a shoe bag. Talk about trauma. I used to check if the bag was moved to see if my mom was actually using them. Now every time I see a muscle vibrator, well I think you understand. There was one toy that had an everlasting effect on me, an oversized penis, not pink flesh color. Now I can’t get that thought out of my head, PTSD. It wasn’t much later I played with a real penis becoming a woman 🙄 So now I went to Mom’s toys, a simple cylinder vibe. My first vibrator was a purple penis run by batteries, my little Martian. Now I have to order a cordless Hitachi Wand and after reading another post, a Womanizer clitoral suction toy. I hate to say that a vibrator allows me to have a pretty good orgasm, there are no bad orgasms, in a matter of a minute or two. It is the fastest of all the ways I have orgasms.

I dunno but your hubby + my wife, the two of us just sitting back and taking it all in... sounds like a definite possibility to me. Hit us up if you're in our neck of the woods.

Playing as a solo male, of course the prettiest girls catch my eye first, but I'm really looking for a hot time with a hot girl, or hot couple. Looks have very little to do with how hot you are, so go simply planning on having a good time with your husband and the opportunities will come as they come.

Petra, I’m pleased for you that you orgasm so easily and without more stimulation than you or your partners can provide directly. Count yourself blessed. On different occasions you have noted that compared with many other folks on this board, while you have a lot of sex, your number of partners is small. I’ve inferred that your professional background is scientific/technical so I know you would be leery of drawing conclusions based on a limited sample size. I’ve been sexually active for sixty years and active in the lifestyle — including parties/orgies, with small and large groups, with couples together and with women alone in a private setting — for more than two decades. And while I cannot give you a specific number of women I’ve observed have orgasms, either as their partner or watching, it’s well over 100 individual women (sometimes one orgasm and sometimes more than a thousand). My observation is that women’s responses to stimulation are all over the map. (And yes, I realize that the responses I’ve observed in large groups or with casual partners don’t necessarily accurately reflect how they are in private with a longterm partner.) On rare occasion at parties I have watched a woman masturbate with a corded wand-type vibe — perhaps orgasming once or twice but apparently bearing down hard while wishing to keep going for more — have overheated one corded vibe and continued with a second. I’m not aware of any surveys done specifically on this board, but here’s one from an organization that provides information to marketers: https://www.statista.com/statistics/1305978/share-of-people-who-own-sex-toys-in-the-us-by-gender/#:~:text=Premium statistics-,Share of people who own sex,the U.S. 2022%2C by gender&text=According to the results of,respondents who stated the same. If four out of five American women own sex toys I think it’s reasonable to assume (I wasn’t willing to spend money to get the breakdown by type0 there are than just a few who have a corded Hitachi-type wand and that they own a corded vibe, despite its inconveniences, for a reason.

bbarnsworth is right on this one. I would HIGHLY recommend that you attend a swingers club...not to swing, but just so you can see what the people that are there look like. Swingers look JUST LIKE everyone else...some are better looking, but some will be not as attractive, but ALL of them usually find a match. As pointed out, there was at least one person on the planet that found you attractive. If there is one, then there are going to be more. You just need some help to understand that you are fine, just the way you are and others will see that. I know that it will be hard to convince you until you actually experience it, so you need to go and actually experience it. I doubt that anyone will feel like they are 'taking one for the team' so their partner can be with your man. Most women are looking for more than just attractiveness in a partner...and so are most men in looking for a partner as well. You'll be fine, you'll do fine, and nobody will be taking one for the team. You bring more to the table than you think...

About 10 years ago we swapped with friends one time before we were married. We didn't even know about swinging. Six years ago my wife secret.y set up a swinging date with friends,I didn't even know that she was interested.everything went great and since we have had over 50 encounters. Each time got better as we gained experience. Last week we were swinging with a new couple, they will be visiting us again this week. We'll be teaching them. Swinging is fun. No experience necessary.

First time swinging, started together, ended separately. We had no plan having an overnight when meeting for our and their first swing that was so much fun it led to us staying over. Agreeing to continuing I had no problem with my wife in one bedroom and me in another.

My wife Amy likes separate rooms more tha I do. She just wants to play in with the same partner. I realized when we had been swinging for a shortat while that she was trying lots of different things with her playmate, things that she didn't do with me. She didn't want me to see but gradually she started to do those things with me when we were making love. That may have never happened had she not had private lessons.

Most people? Don’t think so. Most people have sex in the dark and don’t even want their partner to see. Swingers and exhibitionists are such a small sector of life. And we don’t poop in the middle of the lawn like animals, unless we are drunk

Separate room. Need to focus. Other people ’s noises distract me.