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We played with a couple where the wife would not perform oral, but would have intercourse. The husband would perform oral, but not participate in intercourse. Ok!

A young man and a young woman are going at it. After a quick finish, the boy says, "If I knew you were a virgin, I would have taken longer." She replies, "If I knew you had more time, I would have taken off my pantyhose first."

Interesting. I think it's the other way around for us. I learned my GF likes very rough sex and then I learned to enjoy watching her engage in it. I think part of why she is uncomfortable with being so open about it is maybe partly my fault. When I first saw her engage in this type of sex and learned how much she really enjoyed it I was probably a little too judgmental saying I thought it was physically and verbally abusive and wasn't able to really grasp how she could enjoy it. But after talking to her and watching her engage in all different types of rough sex and kinks I don't feel that way at all. My initial reaction to it was completely wrong but now she is much more open to talking about it and very open in engaging and I've accepted it and even enjoy seeing her engage in it now. But I think she is still a little nervous when speaking to new guys about it that they might have that same initial reaction that I had so I feel like that could be partly my fault.

It was interesting, a huge party, over 150 people. We watched and mingled only, keeping drinking to a minimum. We did see all the drunk people we were warned about! But what an experience! We'd definitely go to another, with less nerves next time.

We started ten later than you did … which doesn’t mean it’s not odd, but it’s not unheard of! ;-D

Yes they were. Did not bother me.

We knew a couple who were in their 70s and threw parties like that. We thought it was the stuff of legend until we attended a few. Epic bacchanalian feasts that had to be seen to be believed. Perhaps some of the more mature swingers here from the NY/NJ area know what I'm talking about. There were always a few people shitfaced out of their minds and I pitied them for basically missing out on what was going on around them... in the pool... in the yard... on all floors of the house... one hundred plus ppl fornicating to yacht rock being piped in from the home entertainment system. More average is literally 4 to 8 couples or so. Sounds like you had a hell of an experience and I'm sure you both got an eyeful!!

Personally speaking, I don't think we have ever had a Lifestyle experience where my wife didn't perform oral. Keep in mind oral can just be foreplay and doesn't necessarily need to be performed to completion. Having said that, everyone has their own set of rules and it's customary to discuss them up front and respect them during play. So I would recommend bringing that one up as far in advance as possible.

For some men, anal would be in there.

The solution is to snowball with another man's cum. She gives him a blowjob and shares the cum with you while you're still excited and banging her. The best of both worlds. As to a woman getting her satisfaction before the guy orgasms, if a woman hasn't already cum I always go down on her. I will go down on her even if she has already cum.

The great thing about swinging is having sex in ways that your regular partner does not. If a woman just wanted to have one type of sex and not another, I'd be ok with that. I can get the other activities elsewhere.

As we have often remarked, no question is too simplistic or awkward in the LS. Curiosity matters, and learning is part of the fun. Wand-type vibrators are meant to be used externally, not inserted into body cavities. There are two asterisks that need to be added, however... 1. There are plenty of porn videos showing the occasional woman with a "relaxed" vaginal passage inserting the head of these things. For the average woman, however, it's a definite "no". 2. There are numerous aftermarket attachments that can be used with the classic (not mini) magic wand that are insertable. See, for example, these: https://hitachimagic.com/product-category/magic-wand-attachments/ Regarding orgasm counts and so on. It's never a competition--it's only what a particular woman wants and is capable of. We'll mention that when Bill Lampert invented and marketed the Sybian, it was originally intended as a training aid for ladies. Indeed, the original name of the Sybian was the "Master Better". One of the things that Sybian does effectively is get ladies in touch with their responses, and their partners as well. It's not unusual for an experienced Sybian rider to move from crest to trough to another crest more or less continuously climaxing for as long they choose. We have observed a 30 min "more or less continuous" climax. Our experience was about 10 min less. That's a physiologic response, not intimacy. But it does give some sense of what is possible.

Ah, now I have to add that to my list.

On an intellectual basis, we control our fertility before we have sex. But in the moment when engaging in sex, instinct takes over and much of that is to instictually do the things that make a baby and get the woman pregnant, which includes pushing in hard and ejaculating inside her. I don't see them, but I know they are there, a living part of a man. A pro-biotic of sorts.

And write your name with it in the snow?

About 10 years ago we swapped with friends one time before we were married. We didn't even know about swinging. Six years ago my wife secret.y set up a swinging date with friends,I didn't even know that she was interested.everything went great and since we have had over 50 encounters. Each time got better as we gained experience. Last week we were swinging with a new couple, they will be visiting us again this week. We'll be teaching them. Swinging is fun. No experience necessary.

My wife and my favotrite swinger gf enjoy dressing up in sexy crotchless body stockings. It's definitely errotic

Between the byob swing clubs and the houseparties we have seen some seriously inebriated Lifestylers. Don't be that couple!

We make it a point to drink very lightly at parties. Our go to drink is a white wine spritzer, meaning a little wine mixed in with some sparkling water in a tall ice-filled glass. It allows for the shared experience aspect of drinking while allowing for how "light" the pour, and the pour gets lighter with each subsequent prep. https://www.thespruceeats.com/white-wine-spritzer-759850 Experienced LS folks will generally agree that as experience accumulates, people ratchet down the amount of alcohol they bring and especially how much they consume. People who attend house parties typically need little (if any) of the social lubrication aspects of alcohol. They attend to have fun. Booze tends to dull that fun, not enhance it.

Based on our experience at house parties, your handle of “rug burn” is very appropriate to describe the festivities.

Her clit. When I'm on the bottom doing 69 with her and he's in her, I like him occasionally pulling out of her and putting in my mouth. After they finish, I'll turn over and go after them individually on my knees. But yeah, I like to go into their slop.

The results are in. Clair and Lora both say that I do a better job with my lips and tongue solo, but they do like the visual of me being taken while getting it. Oftentimes I and the guy in me will finish first, before the girl I'm licking has had enough. Also brought up: us women 69ing while one of the guys is in her vag. I like being underneath in close proximity to his tesicles. Yeah, FFM is my favorite.

I wouldn't say it's a huge issue, but it may cut down on your play opportunities. Everyone is entitled to have their rules and boundaries. The tighter they are though, the smaller the sea you will be fishing in. Nothing wrong with that, just be upfront with people about where the limits are at and then they can decide whether they are compatible or not. For us, it wouldn't be a total deal-breaker. Even sex with each other may or may not involve oral foreplay. We can have satisfying sex without oral. No kissing, that is a rule that is a deal-breaker to us though. I guess because we can't imagine intercourse without at least some kissing involved somewhere between start and finish. Oral sex we can.

Last fall we had a mfm threesome with another guy! We got together at his place and were sitting around his fire pit when he suggested we go jump into his hot tub. I went to the washroom to relieve myself and when I came back out they were both in the hot tub and she was standing in front of him in the tub making out with him and pulling on his cock. Such a hot scene and instant turn on. I quickly got undressed and jumped in. It was the beginning of one of the best nights we have had in the lifestyle.

It would be nice to think that everyone who tries swinging enjoys the experience and incorporates it into their life. But experience shows that doesn’t happen, even when they have "done all the right things" in preparation for their first time. As you note Username 87, the two of you failed to keep a pre-play agreement to not do full swap. There are folks here on the board who have done similar things without causing a post-play problem, but there seems to be a consensus that mid-play renegotiations of agreed upon rules often causes post-play issues. Or even mid-play issues…) I’ve seen this happen to friends of mine, and it happened to me with a couple who were friends. In one case a couple I knew brought a lady friend in. There’d been no agreement the women would play with each other. But they did. By my friends’ account both ladies had a great time. But the next day their unicorn friend freaked out a bit. My own example was actually my first MFM. A couple of months previously the wife in the couple told me they had been talking about inviting a guy to join them in bed for a threesome. At a weekend sporting event we were all attending their hotel had over-booked, but I had a room reserved with two beds. I offered them the second bed. Only when we got to the room there was just one king bed. We got into bed with nightclothes. Then the wife said "This isn’t how we sleep at home" and pulled her nightie up over her head. After that there was way more sex than sleeping. Everyone had a great time. At the end of the event I went with them to their house and while the husband had to go to work the wife snd I continued to have sex. But the aftermath, when everyone’s ardor had cooled, almost wrecked their marriage. We all stayed good friends, but they never played as a couple again, with me or anyone else. (For a number of years the wife and I occasionally played.)

Reminds me of Alice's Restaurant: "They was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on the Bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest Father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly 'N' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me And said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay $50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?" And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench..."

My ex-wife and I did it once at night in a very private location. We didn't like it - sand got in everything.

OK, now let's see somebody ejaculate without having an orgasm.

My husband is the same. We practice Tantra for the bonding experience, not ejaculation control. Sex is as mental for men as it is for women. If men open up to the aesthetic nature of sex and let the woman's true beauty permeate him that is the secret to male multiple orgasm. Society is very cruel to men regarding sex and it is not mens fault. Often times guys are looked at as "dirty" or sub-human deviants obsessed with only 1 thing. I think this frustrates men (it did my husband) because they do feel a powerful appreciation for a woman but society says "no you just want sex." Degrading anyone? When my husband opened up about this we felt so connected and it changed our love life for the better. He knows exactly when I want gentle caressing and when I need a strong hand to work me out. He says the more he empathizes and gives his pure undivided attention to me he feels calm but still extremely turned on. It is in this state that he has experienced the MMO. He described it as an internal heat that shoots up his spine from the prostate. My husbands favorite motto is "sex is a lot like Christmas.....better to give than to receive." I really want to share this with another woman to inspire her to look deeper into her man and undo the damage our society imparted onto him so he can enjoy sex as much as she does. An addition: My husband also comments that a man should view his penis as for the womans pleasure. When a man accepts this he said it decreases his own focus on that area as he allows for more focus on the overall experience. Again, very mental. People often say the only real sex organ is the brain.

We've never really done anything other than some light reading about Tantric sex (never tried any of the actual practices), so it was a pleasant surprise! I'm also pleasantly surprised at how many of the guys around here do it. @Palladin - I don't believe in using chemical enhancements unless absolutely necessary, so I would be PISSED if my husband or any other guy I was with did it unless it was physically necessary. Just letting you know. I don't believe we should put anything into our bodies drug-wise unless it is needed. I've read that using the drugs when they aren't needed can actually cause a dependency upon them. Not commonly, but it does happen (arguably it is psychological). So, while I support your choice to do that, I wouldn't want anyone I was with to do it. @Tribbles - The whole "it's over when the man cums" concept places more importance on the man's enjoyment than the woman's. That is the only reason I disapprove. If the man makes sure the woman is satisfied before cumming and losing all interest, that's fine and dandy. If he expects to get his gratification and leaves her unsatisfied, not cool. For the men who loose all interest after an orgasm, they need to make sure their partner is satisfied BEFORE that happens unless they are willing to use mouths and fingers to finish the job even without any physical gratification from it. Selfishness is all well and good now and then but making it a normal practice is a surefire way to end up with sexually frustrated, pissed off partners! lol