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Showing content with the highest reputation on 09/05/2023 in all areas

  1. 2 points
    Life's guaranteed to have ups and downs. Good on you for trying to be supportive. I hope her father recovers from the stroke well. I had a relative who had one, and lost all sense of touch in the left arm. Hopefully it's as minor as that.
  2. 1 point
    We'll endorse that parental health issues are disruptive, and not uncommonly the eldest or nearest daughter bears the load. The following comments are meant to add perspective based on our own experiences (all parents now deceased) , not suggest courses. 1. Serious health issues such as the aforementioned stroke are inevitable. It's always a matter of 'when'. Preparation does matter. For anyone with aging parents, the value of plans, knowing where paperwork is, and having a couple of legal documents available cannot be overstated. Generally, the documents include at a minimum advance directives, a durable power of attorney for healthcare decisions, and a general power of attorney to manage affairs when the parent is no longer capable. 2. It's very valuable to have conversations with parents when they are well to disambiguate positions and have clear decisions when they decline. While the event itself is usually a surprise/shock, the response should be pre-planned. 3. Acknowledge all of the stresses--time, money, and confrontation of fragility/mortality. Expect libido to evaporate until the crisis is past. We'll add and even emphasize the importance of using these events to reconnect and reaffirm the importance of happiness and joy in life. The stresses will eventually resolve. How anyone emerges from that stress depends on how they feel they were successful and how they felt supported. Finally, sex is a celebration of life. Its time will return. Don't try to use it as a way to accelerate reflection and recovery from crisis, but be ready when both partners are ready.
  3. 0 points
    Not really. We were making decent progress towards reconnecting, being happier, getting our own sex life back to a level I found acceptable and had a couple of talks about resuming threesomes. Ironically her interest seemed to be exclusively towards bringing another woman in rather then couples or single men. This all came to an abrupt halt a few weeks back when her father had some health issues pop up (stroke) which we have had to take the primary role in handling. She's stressed and irritable, sex is infrequent, our communication is down and the lifestyle isn't even on her radar... in fact she just stopped responding to the few LS friends we still have and many of our vanilla ones as well. I'm trying to be supportive through it all, but these aren't the most fun times.
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