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No they can be difficult. BUT Having been there on both sides of our families, my Mom and Connie's Dad, I can attest that sharing those times with each other were some of the most amazing bonding experiences of our marriage. The leeway and support we each gave to the other in turn, lived out the reality of our oneness. The two of you can come through this with a renewed sense of having each others backs that should make dealing with the original questions you posted easier to deal with.

We'll endorse that parental health issues are disruptive, and not uncommonly the eldest or nearest daughter bears the load. The following comments are meant to add perspective based on our own experiences (all parents now deceased) , not suggest courses. 1. Serious health issues such as the aforementioned stroke are inevitable. It's always a matter of 'when'. Preparation does matter. For anyone with aging parents, the value of plans, knowing where paperwork is, and having a couple of legal documents available cannot be overstated. Generally, the documents include at a minimum advance directives, a durable power of attorney for healthcare decisions, and a general power of attorney to manage affairs when the parent is no longer capable. 2. It's very valuable to have conversations with parents when they are well to disambiguate positions and have clear decisions when they decline. While the event itself is usually a surprise/shock, the response should be pre-planned. 3. Acknowledge all of the stresses--time, money, and confrontation of fragility/mortality. Expect libido to evaporate until the crisis is past. We'll add and even emphasize the importance of using these events to reconnect and reaffirm the importance of happiness and joy in life. The stresses will eventually resolve. How anyone emerges from that stress depends on how they feel they were successful and how they felt supported. Finally, sex is a celebration of life. Its time will return. Don't try to use it as a way to accelerate reflection and recovery from crisis, but be ready when both partners are ready.

Update August 2023: Club Rouge is closed. They have effectively moved it to a villa (a 2 story town house) on property. They moved all the equipment and furnishings to the villa. It is very well done with lockers and ambience, You get a golf cart or van ride to the villa from the Clubhouse. Plenty of rooms and stylish beds. Plenty of condoms, mints, and towels. When you enter your clothes have to come off. Best part? There is a large stylish shower that can hold 6 people easily. I liked the Club Rouge at the Club house but the villa is just as good.

I think you just sold us on this! Mainly voyeurs, willing to swap but my guy loves people watching more than anything. This is great!

I'm going to do a follow up to a my follow up: Attended Caliente in March of 2021 Everything from my past posts still apply. There was a cold snap the weekend we went. It seems like they have put new flooring in all the hotel rooms which is awesome. The carpet was looking dated. The rooms do look a little dated still but the flooring really helps and you won't be in the room that much. The food is still outstanding. Masks were worn but most people were not wearing them. Staff was, but it was personal choice if you wanted to wear one. I didn't see a single instance of any problems with people wearing or not wearing a mask. A lot of people had masks that matched their clothing or looked sharp, I went with the LED scrolling mask with my SDC screen name on it. Sadly though I didn't wear it enough to have fun with it! We stayed Friday to Sunday. We arrived several hours late due to an minor emergency. We checked in, had dinner at the restaurant and went to our room. We changed, got dressed up and went to the Club house at about 11:30 pm. There were space heaters outside on the patios of the clubhouse. There were tables, chairs, a bar, and the DJ in the covered area on the first floor. The clubhouse was fairly empty. We laughed because we drove to Caliente, had dinner, dressed up and missed the party. Please note when I say Clubhouse I mean the main Clubhouse that has a restaurant, bar, lounge, sports bar and night club inside. The nightclub was closed due to covid but everything else was open. The gift shop was open and we browsed. The Mrs. picked up a sequined sparkle purse to match her dress. We had a really nice conversation with the gift shop employee. Nothing but praise for the staff. Saturday was much busier and there was a lot of people out and about. The pool was empty because it was cold but the heated conversation pool and hot tubs were full but not over crowded. People stayed in the covered area to keep out of the wind. Recently Caliente opened up Club Rouge. It is located on the 1st floor of the Club house and opens generally around 10pm or 11pm depending on the night. It was recommended that we get a reservation from an online site (SDC) but there was no information about this. There not a lot of information on the Caliente website either. Here's how it works. Club Rouge is a set of on premises playrooms located inside the main club house. We didn't need reservations but they limit the amount of people that can be inside at the same time, and this is a very good thing. We attended without any reservation or advance action needed on Saturday night. There was a short line outside the club, similar to what you would see at a night club. There were velvet stanchions and you couldn't bring drinks into the club. They did provide free bottled water inside which was great. You can roughly see who's going to be entering the club by judging who's in line next to you. If there someone you want to see naked get next to them in line. Everyone in the line was friendly. One lady was a little bit on the drunk side of classy but it wasn't a problem. The entry room is lighted in low light. There's red carpet and art on the wall. Very nice ambience. The staff takes your names and you have to have identification or a driver's license to gain entry. You get a wrist band so they know you have been checked in. There is a smaller locker room with lockers so that you can secure your personal items. The locker room is a little tight for a Saturday night but it kind of makes it fun. You are provided with a towel and are required to take your clothes off to enter. The staff is wonderful. They are super personable, fun, professional, and respectful. I have been naked briefly around the pool at Caliente or when in the hot tub or water. I have been naked one two other times inside where there are other people present. The Mrs. had only briefly been naked in Public and there happened to have been no one else there. There was a wonderful nervous excitement from the entire crowd. Everyone was very nice. There were people of all shapes and sizes. "What are you getting me in to?" The Mrs. disrobed shook her head and just grinned. She was nervous but handled it like a champ. She admitted that she was nervous but displayed nothing but an amazing confidence. It was incredibly attractive! Once you enter the lobby and locker room the lights are kept comfortably low. It sets the mood well. The actual playrooms are through a doorway so there is no fluorescent light bleeding in from the clubhouse. I would say there was probably 15-25 people in the Club. It never felt crowded and they nailed down the number of people perfectly. Enough people coming in to people watch and not enough to feel too crowded. The first room has velvet bench seating along the edge. There is a minifridge that is stocked and restocked with bottled water through out the night. You help yourself. This is a nice touch I really appreciated. The rule is that is the curtain to a room is closed, don't go in. If the curtain is half closed, feel free to watch, and if the curtain is open feel free to enter. If I recall there was one or two rooms with no curtains, and if you were to use that room you knew people could come in. Most rooms had one or two beds. There was a dungeon with some leather straps and a six foot tall cross with straps on it. The room was empty while we were there. It was the only room with tiled floors and I think the room had been converted from the shower area of the spa into a sex dungeon. In the main sitting room there is a window to a room with a round bed. This is a room you would use if you want to be seen. It was initially empty but later a couple went in there and put on a show. They kept things very slow and spent quite a good bit of time in the room. The woman was straddling the man and was almost imperceptibly moving. I don't remember the exact layout of the room but there was room for two couples. The window is very large and is just slightly frosted. There is a hallway with several rooms with beds. Perhaps four rooms. At the end of the hallway there is a larger room with eight mattresses. This room had two televisions with pornographic programming on. There were several couples in the room that were naked. Not wanting to be the center of attention I took the Mrs. to the bed that was on the end and in the corner. The linen was clean and fresh. We dropped our towels and enjoyed each other in this new type of environment. There were three other couples in the room while we were there. There were between six to ten people in the room while we were there with couples coming and going. There were no single males in the playrooms. I don't know if they are ever allowed in but I did appreciate the fact that it was only couples. The age range was all over from a few late 20s, some people in their 30's with most people being in their 40s and 50s. The couple with the female that was a little too intoxicated were probably in their late 50s. It was funny because you would be in the moment....and then they would loudly say something that took you right out of the moment. Nothing bad, just mildly annoying. For example, we would be in the moment then a loud comment would come out that was so out of place that it would cause us to stop and laugh. So, not even a bad thing. But it got to the point that it was apparently mildly bothering everyone because a male voice piped up at one point and said "shut up!" with the frustration of a man with a naked woman in front of him and an annoying guy next to him! It was totally funny and the timing was priceless. That great man caused the entire room to crack up. Props to you sir for getting all the girls to laugh and take all the annoyance and tension out of the air. The couple that was being loud certainly was not offended, and was finishing up. I don't think any of the men came to completion but I can't say for sure. For me, I was brought to the edge five or six times. I didn't know if it was appropriate to finish or not. I've never been in this sort of situation, and it actually felt better to not climax and get to keep going to enjoy everything. There were several couples that came to the doorway and watched, and some that came in and used the beds. Since we were on the end no one came to our area (it was two mattresses next to each other). I can't say how long we were inside the playrooms. It was easy to quickly get comfortable. Everyone was either in a towel or naked. There were no single males so the atmosphere was great. There were other couples that were vocal and it was pretty hot without being obnoxious. There were plenty of people being intimate and I didn't feel like there was a lack of participation. There was a natural lull and since I didn't know how long we had been inside I thought they were closing. Several employees took the opportunity to come in and change the sheets. I think controlling the number of people entering allowed them to change the sheets between couples. I thought they were closing the place down and took that as a sign to finish up. It turns out it was just a turnover of linen, and more people came into the room after the employees had applied the fresh linen. Once we were finished we took a few minutes to look in some of the rooms and watch a couple that had the curtain open. I sat in the main waiting room for a few minutes while the Mrs. used the restroom. The conversation and jokes in the viewing room were great. Sitting there for a few minutes without the Mrs. actually wasn't awkward although it felt more comfortable when the Mrs. was with me. We went back to the locker room and changed into our clothes. There was a great vibe from everyone the entire time. Going in nervous energy and and euphoric vibe changing back into clothes. You can tell everyone had a good time. I was VERY impressed with the cleanliness of the entire place. The staff was outstanding and personable. They are always top notch at Caliente. The other patrons were great. This was our first time in an on premises location and the other patrons were great. This was entirely new for both of us. Never felt uncomfortable. There is no charge or fee to enter the playrooms. There were no phones or property allowed inside. A staff member verified your locker number by wristband. I have nothing but good things to say about Club Rouge at Caliente. I found information a little hard to find online. So I wanted to write this review to let people know about it. Feel free to post any questions or comments and I will do my best to respond.