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Good to hear; that sounds a like us, except we're a 3 woman, 2 man family with children of mixed parentage. And some occasional lifestyle play. Our happiness and success as a family is a result of each understanding the others and being selfless, but also a tremendous amount of luck at finding each other

We never minded tasteful pictures of a nude man, we just didn't care for pictures of his dick, either at rest or at attention. They provided no useful information for us about the person who wished to be my wife's sex partner. Nor do I much care about a picture focusing only on the area between a woman's legs.

That's because it's not the same. If a woman only posted close-up pictures of her pussy, that would be unappealing.

We agree with BBarnsworth. If both arrive at a point in ENM that although they are life-partners in every sense of the term, can freely talk/express their feelings, emotions, desires to each other as well as others in their relationship having alternative/additional relationships can be very healthy and rewarding. We have experienced this in our transition through the first six/seven years of the ENM Lifestyle. We both have had others, couples, solo’s from couples as well as singles that we enjoyed in-depth romantic/intimate relationships with. Most lasting years. They only ended due to life changes, job transfers, out of state family obligations. Both socially as well as intimate. It made a huge difference in our personal relationship as well as social/public face. Her longest relationship was eight years. We traveled and socialized as a Triad. Family and friends socialized with us this way. I’m sure they all had their suspicions but none ever asked. I had three longer term relationships one lasting 6 years. It didn’t ever get messy or emotionally challenging. We both lost our longer term relationships due to life changing issues. With hers he had to move due to family issues and mine she move for an education opportunity. When all are emotionally comfortable and of the same mindset it is very natural. In our opinion for this to last and grow naturally it needs to develop into an even/level polyamory relationship with partners being equal with each other. We have learned this by having close friends that live their lives in this type of relationship. One very close friend has three husbands and children (it is accepted, not interested in DNA testing) from all three. Neither of them are in the lifestyle/swinging. And all five children call all three Dad. So, can it work? Yes of course. Does it need to or does it have to? Absolutely not.

I have seen a number of flags, both American and otherwise, in homes of highly educated people. I don't think being educated means you don't fly flags. I don't think being liberal means you don't fly flags. I see those too. Politics don't matter to us. We have friends on both sides of the political spectrum. We would never consider denigrating them for having different political beliefs from our own. And as far a swinging is concerned, who the hell cares?

bbbarnsworth. "The presence of unease doesn't mean it's not for you (I disagree with lcmim on this one point), but rather it's new and you don't have the tools for it yet." I was not trying to rule this out for them forever. The original question said to me that they were not ready now. The answer to the question has to come from within them. This might take a while. Like I said Life is a great teacher. I probably could have stated it better.

Both my wife and I have emotional attachments to others in our group. It doesn't bother us. We've gone off on vacations alone with others. Having feelings for another doesn't have to break up a marriage, it can add excitement and enhance it. We have no rules.

Only having dick pics on your profile is like trying to sell a car online in a buyers market with only pictures of the dirty engine! No pictures of the condition of the body. Chances are you are going to get no hits at all and passed on by for the sellers that put an effort into making their ad stand out in a positive way. Most women are not going to give a rats ass about what your penis looks like if the person it is attached to is not their thing. Gay men will probably praise it if that is what you are looking for however.

Wish we could “like” this a million times. Two things we’ve never understood about guys in this lifestyle are the dick pics, and those who fancy themselves “dominant bulls”. Both are a huge turnoff and an automatic delete/block.

I just heard a blurb about how Steve McQueen was invited to a soiree the following night at a friends house and invited a girlfriend to go. His girlfriend declined so he bailed as well. Turns out that the host was Sharon Tate and all of the party goers were killed by the Manson family. So don't second guess your gut feelings, they may save your life some day. My personal belief is that if Steve McQueen was at Sharon Tate's house that night, he would have kicked all of the Manson's asses and we never would have heard anything about it to this very day.

Before we went to a house party in 2016, my wife said I bet they have a lawn sign for a particular candidate. Sure enough, they did! A friend said did you see their lawn sign? We giggled. Really great idea not to talk politics or religion. We are going out with good friends tonight who are big supporters of the guy who got convicted of felonies today. Should be interesting. We hope not to discuss it with them. But we are in party mode.

I didn’t literally “cry”, we did just travel 5 hours to meet at a party because we wanted to out what our vacation friends told us about swinging. Differing politics was never an issue with our family, nobody wore their political views on their heads. The only political signs growing up was during election season, and as my father said both sides want what’s best in different ways. An American flag was patriotic. I am reminded that nobody denied elections, wanted overthrow Congress, or take away my rights as a woman. I don’t need sex with others, so I will continue to choose compatible partners who I would want to be friends with when I do decide to explore.

Politics and swinging don’t mix if you are looking for fun. Once a prospective contact mentioned politics or race we took deeper dives into personality. We never asked sensitive questions on certain topics, our focus was always on the why are you looking and what your expectations were. It was always about the woman and her feelings, any mention of politics sent up Red flags. We never asked, we never told, no incompatibilities that way. Our current group of friends will discuss politics because it’s in the news daily and though swinging and sex brought us together, there is much more that keeps us friends.

Refusing contact beforehand because they openly express a view of any kind, says more about you than them.

Him: "If I knew you were a virgin, I would have taken longer." Her: "If I knew you had more time, I would have taken off my pantihose first."

That is an interesting one all right. I would want to know a lot more about the husband. The reason, or cause, of his apparently having already checked out is a huge factor.

Ah, sorry, now I see your point. Yes, some of my wife's lovers were turned on because they were into the taboo of having another man's wife. Usually, this wasn't a problem; in fact, the 'competition' they were contending in made them more vigorous lovers, my wife enjoyed that. A few times the man tried to belittle me with my wife; she quickly told them to knock it off. Not surprisingly, this happened more often when she was soloing than when I was in the room with them. One time, I remember, a guy was fucking her doggy style and he was saying weird shit to me about how I wasn't capable of satisfying her, etc. My wife pushed him away, put a robe on and told him to get out. I was proud of her for that.

Have we all seen what kids watch. Horror, killing, dystopia. They prepare for shooters in school. They watch adults mentally fracture in public over a fast food burger. ETC ETC I'd much rather they see a couple enjoying each other.

Once during the course of a long FWB relationship the woman visited me one afternoon in my upper story hotel room. We didn’t fuck, but I was nude and she was stripped to her waist. (She had great boobs, large and pretty firm; fucked them more than once, but not that afternoon. She gave me a long and wonderful blowjob, leaving me stunned when I finally came. It was only then that we noticed there was a roof on another part of the hotel that was one story lower. And a half-dozen working, who had put down their tools to watch. I was too post-orgasmically zonked to do anything, but my friend got off the bed, turned her gorgeous boobs toward them and made an ostentatious bow before drawing the curtains.

My wife goes bareback with two men and it's a turn-on for me when she's filled. I'm not gay or bi but I love to eat her pussy after she's been with another guy.

One of my husband'a favorite things is fucking me shortly after another man has cum inside me. I've got to say - I like it too!

Former girlfriend came to my house with a pussy full of a friend of her's cum. As we were fucking I told her that I could tell she had somebody else's cum in her and she was quite surprised that I could tell. After that session I would encourage her to tell me whenever she fucked her friend, where he came, and how it felt. We had some pretty interesting sex after that!!!

"Clean"? Our conditioning shows. I could go with "fresh". The whole in's and out's are designed for just that - a semen-filled vagina. Nature has also provided for multiple deliveries by designating a significant proportion of our little swimmers as "Search & Destroy'ers" of other males' deposits. Putting cleanliness and STD freedom questions to one side, are we squeamish about drinking milk, eating certain sausage, consuming an egg? Do we gag at the thought of two cows contributing to our glass? Do we wish to know the rooster's name before consuming an egg? Do we (oh so delicately) de-vein every prawn we munch? Do we concern ourselves with the fecal count statutes when consuming a steak? If it excites the sexuality of the participants, and it happens more or less immediately - why not - all the better to eat you with, my dear.