Huh????
The best swinging, in my opinion, is if people (woman or man) is allowed and encouraged to do things they want to do. Of course you can and should say to your spouse, "I'd like it if this happened." And if your spouse is interested, she/he might do that, to please you and her/him.. Or, perhaps, say, "Yeah, that sounds interesting, but what about this?"
The last thing, IMHO, that anyone should do is 'meet in the middle' if the initial proposal wasn't something that the person wanted to do in the first place.