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Do others talk to the other wives you have played with? We are still new to swinging and learning how to communicate with others during and after meeting others. There are a few on here that have reached out to me privately giving advice on how to proceed meeting others. When reading the public and private messages I take into account the ages and wisdom that comes with age and take the advice seriously. One gentleman wrote that we should not rush to meet so many so quickly, we should enjoy making relationships with like minded people. Another wrote that I should enjoy my new found sexuality, but warned me about users and crazies. She also recommended building relationships. I was also warned of STI and worse. What I love is most writers are my parents age or older and are still active. I also enjoy the opportunity to share our limited experiences and my feelings which I do as if they were my age. This weekend we took a step back with someone we met for sex the weekend before. We met them for three hours with sex as the only reason, we needed to get home to our children. Our time with them was great for us and Timmy and I both thought we wanted to meet them again. Problem is we both have younger children that need sitters. With trying to build a friendship we decided that the families could spend a purely platonic family day together. Children are precious and no sex would be discussed. We met their family for Putt Putt golf and pizza. The kids had a great time together which led to extending the day to include a fair about an hour away. With two cars, the men drove the kids, I got to drive with my new friend alone for that hour. It was the first time other than the first couple we met on our vacation that I got to have an honest open exchange with a wife my age. It was funny how alike we are sexually and physically. They are way more experienced than we are but almost all the meetings are with a type. She opened that not all meetings were fun and not once did anyone want to meet socially. She was amazed about my life and virgin bride status. She asked if I was sorry I did that, I shrugged. We had plenty of laughs about sex and family life. I needed this, time to ask questions and make a friend who I hope I can trust. Night ended with the kids, now friends, having fun at the fair with more junk food and rides. Nobody got sick. I know this is all so quick and will change over time, do others ever get to make friends they can open up to with inner feelings. Maybe I scared her away and she thinks I’m nuts with all the questions, if not I look forward to a broad relationship with them.

That's a wonderful opportunity you had! And I'm so glad you have the opportunity to talk with her one on one, without the distraction of sex getting in the way. Our first couple experiences were happenstance, and total strangers - before and after our night in bed with them. We then went to a swingers club, which was nerve wracking and scary, but ended up being fun. Now we are fortunate to have found another couple who we play with exclusively, and have become very close friends with. We still have not mixed them in with our "vanilla" friends, but it's nice to know I can call her up and go shopping, or just talk over coffee or whatever. Those types of friendships are very important to me, but when we first started down this path, I thought I would have a very hard time talking over coffee with someone I went down on the night before, and whose husband has seen and felt every part of me, inside and out : ) But somehow, life is life, and sex is sex!

Remember when I said not to make the mistakes we did letting good matches get away because we were looking for the next thrill. Alan used to say we were looking for Strange thinking it would be different. Different isn’t always better or even good. Sounds like you found a friend, keep them. You are young and strange will always be there if you want it.

We STRONGLY believe in having FWB...with the friends part coming first. It's GREAT having someone else you can talk to...about ANYTHING (including sex). The only thing you have to be careful with is remembering that you can't talk to all of your friends about anything (especially sex). Stop overthinking and enjoy the ride...

I tend to think if the wives can get along socially then a lasting FWB friendship is possible. I don't mean to generalize, but it has always seemed the men get along easily but the women - not as easily.

She didn’t change the subject during the course of the drive and remained a full participant in the conversation. So it seems unlikely she was put off. I would say you have had the very good fortune of having found someone with whom you can have a friendship that includes great sex. Hopefully your husband and hers have similar feelings. Did you check with yours? (While I have enjoyed playing with singles and couples at parties where I never did quite get even first their names Ann never saw them again, I much prefer ongoing multi-dimensional relationships with play partners. The most satisfying are friendships where we can enjoy a date that may or may not include sex.

Peter, Gold and B&D, you make good points, valid points. The original question included the phrase, "assuming everything else was good". In my mind, this includes such things as common ground and personality. While I (in my 70s) think it would be hard to find a young couple that didn't use their slang (which would turn me off,) and loved The Beatles (which would turn me on,) I don't feel it would be impossible, just unlikely. Further, why in the heck would a woman of thirty want to play with me - I would suspect that (for her) she could find so much better. So, while I think that playing with a young couple wouldn't bother me if everyone was good with it, I never expect it to happen.

Timmy said they got along perfectly. Having 4 kids in the SUV with them the talk better have been tame with kids always hearing things they shouldn’t. I asked Timmy what they spoke about, sports mostly, music, Olympics, and in his very descriptive way Stuff. I knew they had to talk about me, what did he say? He said I had a great ass lol. Not in front of the kids? NO! Timmy made a great point, would they want to spend a day with us if they didn’t click. Good point. Timmy asked what two sexy women spoke about. Don’t you love that question. I know he wanted to know the sex talk. I teased him saying we didn’t talk about him or her husband, just girl talk. Her husband loved my squirting, something that I always thought was a negative. We talked about lesbian sex, we don’t need men. Again teasing Timmy. FWB needs all to get along. She told me they met others where she didn’t like the man which killed any chance of another meeting. In their relationship she has control and final say.

Absolutely acceptable in a club. When you are in a club, almost everyone will ask before joining or touching...and if they don't ask, it's usually best to tell someone affiliated with the club. That sort of thing is REALLY frowned upon. Usually any night is fine, but always check with the club beforehand. Some clubs have different themes or things for different nights. Usually Saturdays are the best (also busiest) nights to go. As for being body conscious...I wish that everyone would go to a club just once in their life...sure, there are some 'better looking' people there (but looks don't guarantee that they are nice, or considerate, or polite, or not complete asses), but most of the people will look just like the people you see in the market...there will be people of all shapes and sizes, and they will (usually) all be having fun and playing (if they choose so). For every body type, there is someone else who is into that body type. One visit to a club usually makes a person much more comfortable with their (almost always SELF PERCEIVED) "flaws"...in fact, some people will even be attracted to those same "flaws". We all have baggage, we all have things we wish were better...skinnier, bigger, whatever, but it's what makes you, you. Almost everyone (meaning there might have been someone who didn't agree but never spoke up) has come away feeling better about themselves after going to a club because they learn that their personal fears are either not noticed or not important to who they met. All shapes and sizes accepted and appreciated!

It took my husband even longer, but once he saw all I was willing to do and how much fun it was, step by step along with me gave in. We absolutely have no regrets! The more the merrier these days and we definitely do get our big sex drives well fulfilled. Worth all time and patience it took.

For us it was time. It took time. As others have said, be patient, take your time, have fun taking things very slow, enjoy the journey. I was not at all looking to be with other women. I am crazy about bi male sex and sharing that experience with my husband. I had to give a little to get a lot, over time I got used to being right there with other women, more and more happened. Other women can teach you things you never knew you didn't know. I perform oral better than ever thanks to doing it with other women (and men) so of course we wound up in interesting situations. I do know when cum is involved, kissing other people, wherever that is (mouth, pussy, breasts, penis, balls, sometimes is a blur. I get all caught up in the heat of the moment. Addictions can do that to a person I suppose. I let what happens, happens, and the flow works itself out. It took my husband even longer, but once he saw all I was willing to do and how much fun it was step by step along with me gave in. We absolutely have no regrets!

"How sore would a man be if he were able to go five times without stopping?" Well I think every woman should find out! If a man want his woman to be in a gang bang of let's say 14 penises then he should try it out first with 14 cocks and see if he can walk it off ;). If he gives her the thumbs up afterwards and a, "It's the BEST Thing EVER!" she should give it a go. :0 But I do agree you get oh so sore from it. I've had my share of them. They are amazing in many ways. First times were when I was single and everyone had protection. Once my husband and I joined out group, felt super safe, I wanted to give it a try again but this time no condoms. It was a totally different experience and they had access to all of me. Much easier handling them all spread out instead of back to back same ole same ole. I was no where near as sore as memory recollects. Did I enjoy it! Oh my goodness YES! Do I do it very often, heck no. It takes a bit of recovery after multiple days of sex or back to back penetration, grinding, rubbing, hunching, and crunching. Then men handle it much better than we do. And to me it is way hotter!

"I would have said "eeeeewwwwww"" lol - my husband used to say that all the time, I have used it a few times myself (he'd rubbed off on me). "5 years ago" Isn't it marvelous how amazingly things can change? "This is now a big part of our lovemaking, mostly after our play partner cums on me." Think of all the fun we are all having now with this added pleasure! "I like to play with it, spread it around, taste it, etc... And the kisses after are the most amazing foreplay between us!" We both agree Emphatically with this! Never better kissing in the world! My husband can get so hard so fast after I've eaten the lady he came in and he's eaten her husband's cum out of me. Not only some of the best kisser ever, some of the best sex afterwards together while kissing with all four of our flavors mixed. I cannot never stop thinking, my mouth covered all over by her pussy eating my man's cum out, her face covered with my pussy and her husband's cum all over and in his mouth smelling like his cock, kissing mixing it all together, dang I can't wait till my man cums in me and we get to suck her husband's cock off to kiss even more while she eat my man's cum out of me. Oh how I love to kiss my man smelling of cock and cum! I love kissing him after sucking balls with me too. A man is never sexier than when he smells of these three things! I could have never imagined kissing another man than my husband but in the heat of the moment when the man has one or more of that smell on him, I cannot resist! Even better with a cummy drenched cock in the mix of the kissing. "Adding cum to the mix is just amazingly erotic" Oh so true!

We have started with swinging for 35 years ago. We were curious after we have read an article about swinging and lifestyle. It took a long time and a lot of discussion bevor we made first step with a couple first time soft swapp, both we have liked, the next swinging evening the first step with full swapp, we have had enjoyed it. Till today, we have never regretted and we enjoy our lifestyle.

That is a great start. There's nothing wrong with that. Things don't have to be the same all around. That's part of the fun. Don't pressure yourself (or let anyone else) into feeling that you have to do something. Ever. Just gently explore when and if the time comes.

When we did the first time she licked me I did not touch her unfortunately that is one of my boundaries I have no issue with her touching me but I can't bring myself to touch her yet. He told me that was fine. I did enjoy the three of us though.

Bringing my play-partners to ecstasy is what I find more enjoyable in the lifestyle; I have never had any problems handling male orgasms in my mouth, cum is a reward for a well-done job.

That's how we found the like minded couples we did to form our closed group.

As a woman, it's a treat to watch one of my guys with his dick in one pussy while he's eating another. As a bi woman, my favorite situation is FFM with me in the middle getting cum ejaculated into my vag while licking it out of hers. Perfect.

I think my wife has a cum obsession as well. She loves playing with it, making me lick it is hot when I think about it. We were fantasizing about a swinger club with the thought of exhibitionism and Voyeurism. The last hot thing she said was if another guy jerked off on my tits would you lick it! I said maybe who knows but now it is a jerkoff fantasy of mine. Thinking about the whole thing happening... so kinky!

I'll have to remember that the next time I'm using a whip on my lover 🤣

Unfortunately divorce is extremely common today with almost half marriages failing. There are normally many factors leading to the separation with one extra incident that finally makes the breakup inevitable. Swinging is not an activity that saves marriages, it sometimes adds to a fractured relationship. My husband Alan said that marriages need time learn about spouses, get to know each other before taking the big step. Leah’s marriage started with swinging, her husband enjoyed a fantasy of sex with Leah’s girlfriends. It was her husband that insisted that his friend be a surrogate husband when he was away. The friend was the safe sexual partner. Alan said that was dangerous situation that would eventually become a problem. This is Leah’s thread, I don’t want to hijack it. We will reiterate that she is a great young lady though she isn’t that young anymore. She is well educated, smart, knows life and is street smart. Her divorce happened as so many others have, what is more concerning is the jerk she looked to as a rebound. The question is how she allowed a degenerate run her life, how he used her when she had so many friends she could have turned to for support. Why do women become subservient out of weakness? PS Leah doesn’t have a cat.

Well, there's a lot of things to think about here, and Numex is an expert in this. But, I'd assume the dynamic is pretty clear here - EVERYONE, including the wives, must be unanimous in a decision to let the single woman in, and in the 'rules' of her joining. If there's even one person with any reservations, that person should be able to veto the opportunity.

I agree with GoldCoCouple. You never know... give it time, and it might be a fantasy she thinks could become true. For my wife, from the time we met and she found out about my prior dabblings in the lifestyle to when she decided (without me saying PEEP..at all!) she wanted to take a step through the door, it was 9 years. So, who knows? Have faith

As a typical teenager, I had a lot of potential interests as career options. And then... Every. Last. One. Of. Them....went right out the window the first time someone sat me in front of a computer. I knew right then and there where my future lay, career wise. And so it has been, ever since then...decades on. As for swinger mags? Yep, saw them when I was a late teen/early 20s kid. Scandalous! How could people do such things? I mean, seriously? Ewwwww! No way! Friends felt the same. Fast forward ...and whaddya know, I'm in the swinger community myself 😄

Because my wife loves fuck and suck strangers different sizes I enjoy watching her cum especially men with big cocks

Years ago I asked Michael why he enjoyed watching me pick up random men for sex. Thought it was strange he would just watch or talking the men as they had fun with me. He turned the question upside down, why did I enjoy picking up different men just to give them blowjobs. Why do we watch porn? He did tell me that he could tell which men I enjoyed and which men left me wanting. He said my excitement started before starting a blowjob.

For us, sucking cock is no different than any of the other sexual acts in which we might engage. It is about her feeling desired and her enjoying herself. I enjoy seeing her pleasure.

I'm going to follow this up just in case anyone feels like they got left hanging. We did eventually get together with my friend and his wife. They are vanilla, but my wife says there has always been flirtation and chemistry, so when we got together my wife and I were committed to testing the waters with them. As is always advised, my wife took the lead. She dressed sexy and made sure there was a lot of subtle touching between her and my friend's wife. Long story short, the two ladies did make out with each other much to the delight of both husbands (and the ladies too), but nothing more... until next time!

About 10 years ago we swapped with friends one time before we were married. We didn't even know about swinging. Six years ago my wife secret.y set up a swinging date with friends,I didn't even know that she was interested.everything went great and since we have had over 50 encounters. Each time got better as we gained experience. Last week we were swinging with a new couple, they will be visiting us again this week. We'll be teaching them. Swinging is fun. No experience necessary.

We would absolutely kiss! We do now when he comes in my mouth. Cannot get enough of it!!! My husband has even grown accustomed so much to it that he even requests we do it. I have NEVER found a kiss to be more amazing than after sucking a guy. Most of my bfs were the same and so is my husband. The numbers of how many love it, like it, are okay with it drop off when I let them cum in my mouth and I wanted to kiss but I always required it of them all. Hey, they want to kiss like crazy after eating me out, what's the difference??? As far as kissing me with a mouthful, now that is a different issue by itself. Only the bi guys were into that but a few straight guys would do it with me (because they knew they could do practically anything with me afterwards). My husband had to get used to it and now is a cum aficionado along with me. :0