My New Swinging Partner

When my wife and I first started in the lifestyle, we had some hard rules.  One of which was no solo playing.  Six months and three BBC adventures later, she decided that the “no solo” play rule was nonsense and asked, more like begged, to be able to play alone five miles away. She was off for summer break.  Since I was working 30 miles away and she was home alone all day, I relented.
 
About a week later, I came home from work and she was waiting for me in stilettos and a flowing summer dress sans underwear.  The dress was a halter type with a slit all the way past her thigh.  She also had the tell-tale twinkle in her eye that she usually gets after she climaxes.  Since she usually wears jeans and t-shirts during the day, I knew something was up.  She had a cocktail already made for me and an appetizer tray.  I was impressed.
 
She led me to the living room sofa and when she sat down, her dress fell open and I could clearly see her bare pussy and one of her nipples.  Now I knew something great was about to happen.  I asked her how her day went and what was the reason for the seduction.  She then said, “I had a great day!”  Then she proceeded to tell me in detail what happened.
 
Her BBC friend DJ came by on his tri-wheeled motorcycle to take her for a ride.  She was wearing a very short maroon skirt with a yellow sheer top.  She had a g-string but no bra.  She was not expecting a motorcycle ride.  He handed her a helmet and off they went.  Since she was in a short skirt, her pussy rubbed directly on the seat as they cruised.  The g-string enhanced he friction from the motorcycle vibration on the seat.  She nearly came from the ride itself.   After they returned to the house, she invited DJ in for some refreshments.
 
Refreshments were quickly consumed and she led him to the bedroom where he helped her remove blouse and skirt.   As she dropped her g-string, her pussy stains were quite evident.  
My wife is usually not very submissive. But for some reason, she enjoys when DJ dominates her and she tries things with him she never lets me or anybody else do.
 
DJ is a former football player with a very muscular physique.  His cock is rather short for a black man, only about 5.5 inches long.  The girth of his cock however is unbelievable.  When he is flaccid, the circumference of his cock is close to the size of a Red Bull drink can.  When he is erect, he is almost as round as a beer can.  Since he is so wide, he easily hits her g-spot on every thrust which makes her cum in great quantities.  After he finished cumming in her pussy, they took a short rest to recover and replenish fluids.  As they were laying in each other’s arms, he made my wife get into a kneeling position and open her mouth.  He then grabbed her head and started to push his cock into her mouth which was no easy feat given his size. Unbelievable to her, she actually took most of his cock in her mouth and sucked him until he came down her throat.  Something she refuse to let me do.
 
Next, he made her lay on her stomach with a pillow under her waist.  He then proceeded to flog her ass, thighs, and cunt lips with a leather flog.  She always said she didn’t care for BDSM activities but here she was, laying on her stomach with a cum load in her pussy, one in her belly, getting her genitals flogged by a stranger.  The more he flogged her cunt, the more she squirmed and moaned until she actually orgasmed.   
 
She then felt cool coconut oil being rubbed on and in her sphincter.  She told me him was too big but he didn’t listen.  He then grabbed her by the hips and pushed his beer can cock into her ass.   After an initial painful gasp, she finally became accustomed to his cock in her ass and actually started fucking him.  When she grants me the rare opportunity to fuck her ass, she begs me to go fast so I cum quickly and finish.  Given DJ had already cum twice, there was no rushing him.  He pounded her ass for at 10 or more minutes until he came the third time.
 
As she lay exhausted, DJ dressed and kissed her goodbye.  I came home about an hour later.
 
As she related her experiences that day she noticed I was visibly aroused and decided it was my turn to have fun.  We went into the bedroom and I started to licking her all over.  While the shower she took after DJ left cleaned out her pussy, it didn't quite get all of his cum out of her ass.  I tasted another man’s cum for the first time in my life.  For some reason, she now enjoys an occasional flogging and ass fucking from me.                         

Let me first apologize in advance if this (or something similar) has been covered and discussed extensively already. I'm sure my situation is not entirely new or original, but it is for me, so I'm throwing it out there. If you've got any experience or advice you'd like to drop my/our way, by all means, please do so. I also apologize for the length but the reality is that this deal has some history to it that I think is relevant.
 
My wife (25) and I (27) have been married for five years, we have a son that just turned two. For several years, we've talked in foreplay about having other partners - but it was just talk for a very long time and nothing more. After the baby was born our sexuality dwindled considerably and until last summer, it seemed like it was going to evaporate into nothing. Well, at some point over the summer we both started seriously (and excitedly) considering the idea of swinging and perused some of the sites regarding it. We put a discreet profile out there, met a couple and after careful consideration, we had them over for dinner and whatever might come. To start off the night, we began fooling around with our own wives but no one ever 'made the move' and it ended up being a nervous and awkward event. They courteously left the next day and nothing happened.
 
We continued to talk to the couple and decided to reschedule another night, but eventually we started getting cold feet about it and just decided to put the site and our vague and fledgling relationship with them behind us. So we did, but with some strange side effects remained lingering. My feelings about her with another guy are in somewhat flux, but for the most part, if it's the right guy/situation, I'm confident I could deal with it - considering seeing her with another man, as for many guys, is a huge turn on. For me, it's even a bigger turn on than getting it off with another woman. But my feelings are sporadic in this regard, so I can't say for certain how I feel. She, on the other hand, doesn't necessarily want to be with another man anymore. What she does want, from both a sexual and emotional angle, is that I explore having a relationship with another woman, but not strictly sexual. She wants me to have a real girlfriend on the side.
 
Now I trust my wife on this. She's fully aware of this site and my posting here, as she'll no doubt read it upon me showing it to her (she may even participate). That being said, I want it to be known that she's not looking to split up our relationship or cover for something she's doing on the side. She's genuinely enjoyed talking about the idea, as far as I can tell, of me doing sexual things and emotional things (dating, caring for, commitment) with another woman.
 
For the average married guy, I suppose this is an easy situation - you get to have sex outside of your marriage at your wife's consent, what could be better than that? And trust me, I see the advantages to it. That being said, I have some serious concerns...
 
My major concern is who the hell would want something like that? How do I approach it with someone? We've done some extensive research on polyamory and swinging, so we're both comfortable with me having another girl who I have a relationship with, but I just don't even know where to begin to look for such a thing. How do you even breach that subject with someone I like without looking like I'm trying to find a clever way to cheat on your wife? I find people are usually on two sides of the bed with regard to having an emotional/sexual relationship outside of the marriage. Either they want to do it behind their spouse's back and are cheating -or- they simply want to experience the openness of sex outside their marriage like the average swinger. I'm somewhere in between the two and I'm not really familiar with how to handle that at all. To complicate things, we're close to my extended family and they are very religious - if something like this were to happen, it would have to be somewhat discrete? Is a relationship like that possible and enjoyable? Would another person ever consider something of that nature?
 
Anyways, I've written a lot and I don't want to present an 'epic ton' of nonsense here. I've read this site from time to time and I figured it was a good place to find open and honest people to bring something like this up and get some good advice. Let me know how you would go about looking for another partner like this? How you would present the situation (I'm married but my wife wants me to have a girl friend) to someone? How would you maintain a relationship like this? What are the pitfalls? What should I look out for?
 

 
Feel free to ask me any questions that might fill in the gaps. Thanks in advance for any responses...

Due to my profession, I am away from home for a month to 4 months at a time. I'd like to just stay with her, but there's no work for a U.S. filmmaker in Paris. She can't travel with me due to health issues, money issues and her citizenship.
 
My girlfriend and I are very in love with each other. The separation is difficult, but she suffers the most.
 
Last week, after a heart-wrenching telephone discussion about how lonely she felt, and how hard it was for her to sleep in an empty bed, among other things, I asked her to find herself a lover.
 
The decision was a tough one. We aren't swingers. However, I don't want to lose her because she is lonely and feels trapped by our relationship, and I want someone to take care of her and her needs, whatever they may be, while I'm away.
 
I've never been with a girl that swings, but it is a fantasy of mine. In my mind, I accepted the fact that my GF would be with someone else. Instead of being jealous, I liked the idea that my GF would have someone to give her the some of what I can't while I'm away.
 
She was shocked. Then she accused me of proposing this so I could do the same. I assured her that I had no intention of being with anyone else. I want this to be like a gift of my love to her.
 
She's bi... In fact, she was thinking she was a lesbian before we met. While I was away a previous time, she'd had a sexual encounter with a female friend of mine. The two of them had gotten very close. They were drunk after a party and voila!
 
However, now she was against the idea. She wanted me, not someone else.
 
Since then, she's had our friend sleep over several times. Nothing's happened, but I know they kiss each other a lot. I feel so relieved that my GF is not alone in bed.
 
Then, she proposed that I find her someone. She didn't want to find her lover. So, I asked asked another girl I know, and guess what? She didn't even blink!
 
Of course, my GF was shocked again! She didn't think I would seriously do something like that! LOL! So far, nothing has happened. They've started writing emails to each other.
 
Now, the idea of my GF with other people totally turns me on, and I feel good inside knowing that she's not alone during those cold Parisian nights.
 
She's worried about where this will lead, and even thinks that maybe I'm just trying to get rid of her... to pass her off to someone else. (I can assure you that's not the case. I wouldn't propose this if I didn't trust and love her completely. I just want her to be happy until I can be there with her.)
 
Am I going about this the right way?

I am a married white female who has been dating a black man for four months now. Our relationship is purely sexual and my husband knows about the whole thing and thinks of it as a turn on. My boyfriend joins my husband and I for a threesome once or twice per month, but for the most part I spend time with him alone. My husband loves for me to bring him home the evidence and listen to my account of what happened when I was out. I was just wondering if there are any other couples out there who have similar arrangements within their relationships. If there are, I would love to talk about our fun.

Me and the wife have had our problems, resolved them, fully trust each other and Love each other very much. Just had to get that out of the way lol because I know trust issues should be resolved before anything and I want to make sure everyone knew we did, anyway:
 
We are somewhat new to actually participating in the whole scene, we have had a few threesome with another female and one experience with a couple. All of them were exciting and I had a bit of a performance issue with the couple one (first time for us have a little issue with my size sometimes lol) but anywho, yeah we're new...ish.
 
Recently my wife explained to me how it's exciting and maybe even adventurous to be able to have sex with other people (with all of our swinging rules mostly in place) but tell each other about after. That if I didn't know she feels a rush. I found this arousing for some odd reason but I can see it possibly making me feel a bit funny, maybe. She said I'm free to do the same but then she I guess rethought it and realized it's kind of strange and that we should consent each other before doing it. So basically swinging separately sometimes, and if feelings arise ties are cut.
 
I guess I didn't have a question about all that but rather has anyone else had that whole fantasy type situation arise? To be aroused by having sex without your SO knowing and then telling them and it would be a turn on to both of you? Of course she realized it could pose a big problem and I was comfortable with it but yeah, just wondering if that was just us.... lol