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Showing results for tags 'assault'.
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My latest girlfriend told me when she was 16, she was going out with a 30-yr old guy and having sex with him. I had an ex who was going out with a 21-yr old when she was 15, and they were having sex, too. My first reaction is to be open-minded about what happened, but later and deep down, I think it's just wrong. I don't blame the girls, who say they were in love with the men, but what kind of guys are these? Maybe I'm just being too conservative? Are these kinds relationships normal but I just wasn't aware of them? Is it a French thing? (Both girls are French with Asian heritage.) If the topic comes up again, should I speak my mind, like, "The guy you were going out with should be in prison for raping you."??? What do you think? Is it ok to hit on a teen, then have sex with him/her once you've seduced her/him?
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My wife, Wendy and I have experimented in swinging in the past by inviting a friend to join us in bed on several occasions. This Saturday Wendy and I were at a pool opening party and she had a bit too much to drink and too much sun. We were at her boss' house and he directed us to a room where I could lay Wendy down for a bit. He had hit on Wendy in the past but wasn't a total jerk or anything, he was nice enough to help me get her in bed, but I noticed he was also taking this chance to feel her. Wendy was nearly asleep/out and I should have just said "Ok, I can take it from here". I don't know what came over me but when he put his fingers at at the hook/clasp of her bikini top between her breasts and looked at me, I just nodded and he looked back to her for a sign of her noticing. Her eyes were closed and I just kind of stood there as he slowly undid it and very gently pulled her top apart and to the side so she was topless. He felt each breast gently and then softly kissed each nipple. Then he stopped and said thanks, you have no idea how long I've wanted to see and touch your wife's breasts. Then he left. I'm not sure what to tell Wendy or what I should do. I feel I let her down, which I know I did, but I'm not sure what step to take now? -
Some background: A little over 1 year ago we met this couple through a swinging personal ad site. We got along with them *apparently* very well and had some fun times with them over the course of last summer. All of the sudden, they more or less disappear and we really don't hear from them until just a couple days ago. The situation: He IM's C a couple days ago and they start chatting, catching up so to speak. He lets her know that his wife is in another state for the next few days on some family business. You guessed it, he tried to worm his way into a 3some with us.* *Not that I/we would mind too much but given the fact its the first time we hear from either one of them in almost a year and the first thing he wants is a 3some....no way We more or less laughed and shrugged it off. Well...yesterday he messages C again and this time he started off with "I WANT TO FUCK YOU LIKE A NASTY WHORE" and then he proceded to tell her his wife thinks I am too much of a bottom and don't know how to fuck on top and he remembers how C got into it when he was banging her and he wants to give her a *real* fucking, etc etc etc C tells him repeatedly to knock it off and he keeps bugging her. The last thing he said to her before she put him on ignore is "YOU NEED TO BE PUMPED BAD" Ok, I know this isn't how most male halves of swinging couples act. However, am I justified in wanting to beat the fuck out of this guy for completely disrespecting C and talking to her like some kind of cheap whore and more or less breaking our trust of him? (we thought he was a decent guy and could be trusted with C's personal Aol instant messenger information)
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It has been a while since we posted so this is gonna be a little long. 2 weeks ago we were invited to a party where it appeared that there were going to be more single bi women (unicorns). Mrs fun was a little reserved. One day well maybe, then we can't because of this or that. No big problem, I'm not a pusher . Of course, me being a guy I'm thinking (omg ). So the day of Mrs. fun is ready, willing and already has decided what to wear, we were going We get a message that the party has been postponed till the next weekend because not enough people sent rsvps. So now 15 people send rsvps and we are really looking forward to going. My only reservations are it is mothers day weekend. Mrs.fun has no problem with this because she has made plans for our kids to stop by for an evening cookout the next evening. HERE IS WHERE THE PROBLEM BEGINS. We planned on meeting a couple for a drink to maybe become possible playmates, they were in a hurry that day and so were we so we met halfway to the party at a convenient place, made small talk and had a drink, and we went our separate ways thinking we were all compatible. Except we couldn't invite them to the party without the owner's permission. So off we go, we get to the party and one half of the hosts shows Mrs fun to our reserved room to put our overnight bag away while I go to the kitchen to put our drinks away in the frig and make us a drink. We make small talk, play a game of pool or two, and mingle a little. I felt a little buzzed, then it hits: BLACK OUT, very vague memories. Mrs. fun was in the hot tub with a single guy that we (both think the world of) and I can remember while she is having what I think is a good time I leaned over and kissed her and said "I love you" to her. She can remember to that point that she went to our room and crashed out, that's the end of her recollection till morning. I have one memory of a girl tugging on my ponytail in a good way but that's it. We wake the next morning in our room together and I'm really not feeling good at all. Mrs fun says shes gonna shower and I go down for some coffee. We make small talk with the owners and ask if we can take a couple pics before we leave and they said sure, so I snapped a couple of Mrs fun and the dance floor (no members) and off we go feeling like we're a little hung over. On the way home our talk was mainly about we can't remember a thing, EITHER of us, and the drive is very long. We get home and Mrs.fun passes out in a way that off to the hospital I go. (We live close) Doctors tell us that we have rohyfnol (aka rooffies) in our systems and I shouldn't even be able to stand as much as I had in me and want to know if they should call the police.(well NO) We have to have our son come pick us up. What a thing on Mothers Day. It has been a week now and we have talked a lot about this. My problem is I have always tried to be the guard in this lifestyle and I somehow failed. We have been through every emotion this week except anger at each other. Now here's another strange thing, we have spoke to no one about this. We tried to contact the owners of the group\club when we got home and we were BANNED from the group, no mail, no nothing. Wouldn't ya think they would have at least been concerned about our well-being? When I asked to take a pic or 2 wouldn't ya think they would have said no? And then to be banned by the time we got home? This has been a rough week, it is time to pull our heads out of the sand!
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Is there anything in the lifestyle that worries or scares you?
Guest posted a topic in Polls & Never-Ending Threads
Is there anything in the lifestyle that worries or scares you? -
Last night I went to my first swinging gathering.. I found it online and I did go alone but I told my guy where I was going and my roommate was aware I'd be at a 'party'. I had three drinks.. I poured the first two myself and did really light pours of rum (less than an ounce) and was sober. When a bunch of girls started dancing and I sat there watching a guy came over to me and said he'd get me another drink. I felt like because it was a relatively small gathering that I was safe and let him.. he returned, I drank it. I blacked out almost instantly after drinking that drink. I have vague snippets of the night that I can recall but mostly I remember a guy trying to have sex with me and feeling like I couldn't move and freaking out. I ran to the bathroom and began to cry and the guy that made my drink followed me and started literally yelling at me- it's still fuzzy but he said I 'drank too much' and was 'too wasted' and 'ruining the party' and have to go now. Everything else is a blur and when I got home, my roommate was alarmed and took me to the hospital. I tested positive for rohypnol and today I feel like I've been ran over with a mack truck. This is 100 times worse than any hangover I've had and my emotions are still all messy and confused. Is it dumb that I feel ashamed and embarassed? He was going on about how wasted I was but I only had three drinks. It was my first time and I just don't get why he had to do that.. I feel angry and confused. Honestly, my advice to people starting out is unless you REALLY know the people, drink water and keep your drink in hand at all times. I know it's cliche and said over and over again but it's for good reason. Having this happen is terrifying, so be safe.
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Mr Indy and I had an unfortunate incident at a club last night, and it has prompted us to discuss a few things we want your opinions on. Here is the question: As a woman, it seems that in order to say NO, you have to have been violated atleast once. (I am only talking about getting groped, nothing more) Something has to happen to generate the NO response for you, and to me that mean you have already been violated. It seems in my experience, single men are the ones that take the NO and move on. The married guys are the ones that don't. As a woman, do you accept the liablity that undesired groping is going to happen just because you are at the club and dancing seductively? Or.... Do you expect the club to be steadfast in a proactive stance against this and protect your right to dance seductively/suggestively by educating and watching over the men in attendance? Do you immediately inform the club 'bouncers' after the first unpermissive touch and ask that the man be removed or talked to, or do you allow one slip and on the second attempt go to the authorities?
