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Showing results for tags 'conflicts'.
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Twice this week, nudist friends who are not swingers expressed resentment that swingers have "invaded", "taken over", "annexed" their clubs. Their dismay is valid: in both instances the club operators made a decision to welcome swingers as an alternative to financial collapse. One way to look at this is to assert that swingers "saved" these clubs. Another way to look at this is to observe that one alternative lifestyle is simply displacing another, and nudists are in danger of extinction. Neither image is attractive. In any event, simple social nudity is imperiled. There are a couple of things lifestylers can--and probably should --do to support our nudist friends. First, when on the grounds of these formerly-nudist-now-mixed clubs, give the non-swinger nudists a measure of respect. Many joined those clubs because it was family- safe, not sexually liberated. Their values might be different. Second, and maybe more important, it may be worthwhile supporting their efforts to be clothes-free elsewhere, such as on public lands, beaches, state parks and so on. According our nudist friends a measure of respect costs nothing. Having them think kindly of swingers may be valuable as various alternative lifestyles fall under political and religious siege.
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Recent word is that seems like some of the property owners don't care for Caliente reaching out to the swinging community instead of remaining strictly a nudist resort. -
Heather and I saw this post in Julie's thread she had started about swinging being the ugly stepchild of alternative lifestyles, and felt like it was something we wanted to address but by the time we got this typed the thread had taken on a little bit different feel so since we didn't want to hijack her thread or the discussions since we decided to post a new thread. So here goes....... When we first saw this post we got a chuckle out of it for a couple of reasons, first reason is my wife and I are nudists as well as now being involved in swinging. Not only are we nudists but I am the President of a local naturist organization as well. My wife and I have been involved in nudism together for just shy of 4 years now (I grew up in the lifestyle while she didn't), while we have only been involved in swinging for only about 3 months now. And yes, Heather and I DO NOT mix the two lifestyles when we are at nudist events; we are at nudist events, we do not talk about swinging or make passes at people even if it is someone we think we would be interested in that way. I want to give everyone an insight into why many nudists feel the way they do in regards to swingers, this is something that I can come at from multiple directions, on the one front being involved in nudism as a naturist organization President, from a second direction of seeing the effect that those who are involved in swinging as well as naturism that don't keep the two separate have had for couples who are involved in naturism where one of the spouses are reluctant, and from a third direction of being a parent. Well let’s just take these one by one: Angle #1 As the President of a naturist organization I have several issues or basis of issues with swingers/swinging (don’t start the hypocrite, burn him chants yet hear me out on this). Issue 1: My member’s safety and comfort As the President of our organization I am the top person of the four Officers of our organization who is ultimately responsible for everyone’s comfort and well being at our events, my members do not come to our events looking for sex, a hook up, a play friend whatever you want to call it, my members come to our events because they feel that the naturist/nudist way of life is a healthier and better way of life, they come to be in the company of like minded people, and they come to our events because it is a FAMILY FRIENDLY ENVIRONMENT that is safe for the WHOLE FAMILY. I have had three fights break out because of swinging nudists/nudist swingers, all three fights were started by the swinger nudist/nudist swinger after being told off by the parties they choose to hit on/make advances on. These fights have endangered the safety of my members, not to mention upset them and made them feel uncomfortable. That is not what they are there for. Issue 2: Loss of members In the 4 years I have been involved with our organization I have lost 15 members due to swinging nudists/nudist swingers because it bothered them that much that someone made advances on them, or in five of the cases because the wives of the couples we have lost having what they feared nudism to be about happening to them. One of the five couples left our organization due to getting hit on by someone at our event who was not even a member of our organization but there as a guest, the remaining four couples have encountered swinging nudist/nudist swingers elsewhere and have choose to leave the naturists lifestyle because of it, and then of the remaining five I now have 5 husbands who now attend our events without their wives because of swinging nudists/nudist swingers. Issue 3: False Advertising by Swingers Club There are several places close by that are; either Swinger friendly or outright swinger that advertise themselves as nudist resorts and then there is the national scene where you have two * so called FAMILY FRIENDLY* nudist resorts (Caliente and Paradise Lakes) that either turn a blind eye to swinging and swingers (Paradise Lakes) or are affiliating themselves with swing clubs and hosting the swing clubs events there at their facilities (Caliente) and yet they still call and advertise themselves as being FAMILY FRIENDLY NUDIST RESORTS. Lets call a spade a spade here, if you knowingly allow swinging to occur on your property you ARE NOT a nudist resort you are a swing club drop the words nudist resort from your website, remove yourself from nudist resort listings and advertise yourself truthfully. Now here is Heather’s and my take on nudism and swinging: We DO NOT mix nudism with swinging when we are at a NUDIST RESORT or CLUB. No matter how much we may like a couple at a nudist event looks wise or personality wise, we DO NOT mention our involvement in swinging. If a SWING CLUB is okay with us being nude there be it in the pool, clubhouse or whatever then we will be nude if that is okay. We keep both lifestyles separate; we DO NOT and WILL NOT mix them, and think that most nudists who are not involved in swinging would be much more tolerant of the ones who are if they would keep the two separate like they should be. Angle # 2: Spouses who won’t participate in naturism any longer In my position as President of our organization I field over the course of a year probably an average of 10 to 20 inquires where the wife refuses to participate in naturism any more due to swinging nudists/nudist swingers. (See Angle # 1, Issue # 2 ) I have four naturists friends who their wife’s and children used to participate in naturism with them but don’t now because of a swinging nudist/nudist swinger. I see numerous postings on the zillion nudist boards and groups I belong to net wise, talking about the same thing. I have just in my four years of being with my organization 18 couples that I have been in contact with who like me said I am not going to go unless you go, who used to go to nudist events with their spouses but again don’t anymore due to swinging nudist/nudist swingers. That right there is 36 possible members to our organization that won’t occur due to swinger nudists/nudist swingers (Again see Angle #1, Issue #2) Angle # 3 As a parent As a parent there are certain things I do not want my children to see or hear yet. When my wife and I take our children to a nudist resort we do not want them to see two adults making out, having sex, seeing evidence of said activities (used condoms, discarded sex toys). In front of our children my wife and I are very G-Rated, if you see a PDA between my wife and I when our children are around it is very G-Rated a quick kiss on the lips or cheek, holding hands, etc. Our PG and PG-13 and beyond rated activities and PDA are reserved for either when the children are sleeping, in the privacy of our bedroom, or when our children are not here, and to be quite honest when the kids aren’t here there isn’t really anyplace that is off limits to us and we thoroughly enjoy making lines from movies and songs that we have heard to take on a whole new personal meaning for us but that only occurs when the kids are not here or in the privacy of our bedroom. (Think the song Cherry Pie by Warrant, the line “and Dear God please forgive Mr. Sprock and I for the fornication that took place on this very table this morning- Where the Heart Is (a movie). If you want to swing that is fine but my wife and I do not want our children exposed to it by YOU (not referring to you here Lee, but swingers in general) and I do not want them exposed to it at a nudist resort. I am willing to say that I can be quite sure that this runs true for most parents who bring their children to nudist resorts. This is kind of a Angle 1 and Angle 3 issue here as well, some resorts/clubs will call the police on you if your behavior warrants it unfortunately there are some Cops and Law Enforcement officials who see children being around naked adults as being child abuse, getting a call for something of a sexual nature occurring and then the cops seeing children there only strengthens that view and only adds fuel to the fire of organizations that want places such as ours (nudist resorts) shut down. Long and Short: Sex and Sexual Activities is something for consenting adults to engage in and for said activities to occur in the presence of consenting adults be it in the privacy of their bedroom, a swingers club, or hotel room. Sorry for the long response and hope I made sense to everyone. OKAY now everybody light the torches, sharpen the pitchforks, and start throwing the rotten tomatoes and lettuce at me crying at the top of your lung that I am a HYPOCRITE. George and Heather
