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I wrote a nice long trip review that I accidentally deleted so here's the highlights. We are a mid 40s couple that has never been to a Desire property. We have been to Caliente twice for a weekend but do not swap and our experiences have been limited to some voyeurism and minor public sex stuff. First off, the rave reviews about the staff being excellent and outstanding are all true. The staff makes the resort the world class place it is! We didn't communicate with anyone in advance and showed up blind. That's a personal choice but I think making an effort to connect with people that might be there the same time you might improve your stay. If it's your first time, or you don't feel comfortable doing that then it's no big deal. All the other guests are very friendly and it's easy to strike up a conversation with anyone! Cons: More bartenders would have been nice. Not a big deal but those poor guys and girls were overwhelmed. At night on Saturday trying to get a pizza outside the lobby at the bar took about 25-35 minutes. On the plus side it does give you more time to talk to people. Perhaps having staff periodically come in and clean and pick up the play room would have been nice. Remove empty cups and so forth. Pros: Everything Staff is the best I have ever dealt with anywhere in the entire world bar none. The grounds and rooms are very clean. The nightly entertainment is amazing and I would say don't miss it. Performances were behind the lobby. I didn't see if the times were posted but we might have missed it. Other stuff: The people at Desire make the experience. Hands down. I (m) am introverted and have a tough time making conversation. I go from “oh what do you do for a living,” straight to “what's your deepest darkest fear and secret?” There is no subtlety or tact. My wife, on the other hand can converse with anyone and strike up a conversation. I can't get over how nice, and friendly everyone was! You could strike up a conversation with anyone or everyone male or female. It was like the other guests took a real effort to be outgoing and make you feel comfortable. The best part of the vacation for me was the people. Just nice genuine people. And there's naked people. You think people watching clothed people was fun, try taking their clothes off! Since everyone was there with a spouse or partner no one was trying to prove anything. No one was taking a vacation here for their kids or under a rushed schedule to see things. People were there to enjoy their loved one and maybe have some sex. Or a lot of sex. We had boudour photographs taken by Provoke Photography. It was expensive but I highly recommend it. We had never done anything like that before and they do a great job. I would definitely recommend using them for hair and make up. Three young ladies came in performed hair and make up like a formula one pit crew. My wife's hair and make up looked great. Definitely worth the money! Our photographer did an outstanding job of making us feel comfortable and look good! For men the recommendation was a pair of pants and a dark shirt (we were keeping our photo shoot pretty tame). If you have any requests during the photoshoot don't be shy and ask. Everyone was very accommodating. Several hours after the photoshoot we had an appointment and selected our final photographs. It would have been nice to have more time to look at the photos but it seems like they were on a tight schedule that day. Totally recommend Provoke! We also booked an erotic couples massage for two couples (so four masseuses). I contacted Desire in advance and booked it for our last full day there. I thought that if we found a couple we liked we could invite them to join us or we could just have two masseuses each. We ended up each having two masseuses each. It was totally worth every penny, and it was just a great experience. The difference between having one and two people giving you a massage is exponentially greater than you might think. We spent most of our nights dancing in the nightclub and used the playroom twice. In the future I would bring as large of a beach towel as I had with me to the playroom and the vinyl seats didn't have sheets and the provided towels were normal size. Just having your own large towel to put down is nice. We went to the nightclub almost every night. I was worried based on other reviews that there would be a lot of latin music. I LOVE 90s music and I am very happy to say that music was spot on and it was a mix from 80s and 90s music up to modern songs! I think Desire Management heard the criticism and updated their music. I don't know if there was a live DJ or not (when there's naked topless women I get distracted). This was honestly one of my fears, that the music would be subpar but it was outstanding and had everyone on the dance floor! I have zero rhythm but we danced the night away! We dressed for all the theme nights. You can just barely match the theme and do just fine though. We were only there a few days and felt like there was always something on the schedule (foam party, massage, photo shoot, covid test). In the future I would do 7 or 8 days but I would still schedule all the same things. We didn't catch everyone's name unfortunately but had great help from: Cesar for checking us in Rafael our butler took care of anything we needed I flagged down Victor in the middle of the night for four problems at once and he was an absolute superstar! That was the review that is vanilla. We had two other things to mention. The erotic massage. It was hilarious. This was out first time at somewhere so....thorough? I didn't want my wife to feel uncomfortable and take things to far. We talked about it and decided to make it a non sexual massage. They give you a form before the massage and there's a diagram of the human body and you mark where you don't want to be touched. Or where you do want to be touched? Ah fuck, I didn't listen to the instructions. I put a large "X" over my crotch. Does that mean they will touch it? Or will they understand the "X" means don't? Just to clarify I go to the lady at the desk and tell her, just a regular massage is fine. "You have an erotic massage, yes?" She is super friendly and looking at me like I'm an idiot. I'm not sure if she was confused but I was relieved that everything was taken care of. "Yes, but just a regular massage is fine, a normal one." My wife was next to me. Whew, glad that is clarified so we are on the same page. The nice lady at the front desk smiles and says "ok." We are taken to a nice locker room where we lock up our items, shower, and then are escorted to a hot tub with champagne and flower petals in the tub. Then we get taken in for our massage. Two women for each of us. We get the massage and two masseuses are doing a great job. Then they do your legs and thighs and then they do the...THEY DIDN'T GET THE MEMO! At this point I made a legitimate effort and my conscious is clear. They definitely handled my equipment with great skill. They give the massage and then towards the end they stand my up and guide me over to my wife at her massage table. We are covered in wonderful massage oils and are both pretty worked up at this point. Imagine having sex with your wife but you have a cheer leading section ready to step in and give a hand. It was that amazing. The women massesues knew their business! They were skilled! Once I was over with my wife we had intercourse, and it was like having four sets of hands helping you. One was pushing on the small of my back (lol, maybe she thought I needed better rhythm?). Another was running her hands across our bodies and applying a very nice massage oil. I grabbed ahold and sucked on one of my wife's nipples. A few minutes later one of the ladies grabbed my wife's breast and made sure it was in the right position to be sucked but putting right in front of my mouth! Team work makes the dream work. I made a conscious effort to not finish during the massage, and also not when I was on the other massage table with my wife. I wasn't sure what the protocol was and I really like to get my wife off first! We immediately went back to our room hot and heavy! One night we went up to the Hot tub. As we were walking upstairs a couple was walking downstairs and complained there was no one even up there. We figured, roof top hot tub to ourselves? That doesn't seem bad. We go up there and there we no other guests. Also no bartender. Anywhere. Oh well, so we get in the hot tub and about 2 minutes later a group of about 10 people show up. Naked and having fun. They see there is no bartender. So the women start ordering drinks, and this magnificent bastard goes behind the bar naked as a jay bird and starts mixing drinks with the alcohol behind the bar. The man was the hero we needed. He asked "please no complicated drinks." He kept this up for 15 minutes! We figure since it's all inclusive it's certainly not stealing and if you don't want your guests pouring the drinks your job to keep the bar tender there. After a long time and a lot of laughs the bartender shows back up from somewhere and gets to making drinks. He didn't say anything, probably because he could get in trouble, and we didn't say anything because it was hilarious. Here's to you naked guy with a wide brimmed straw hat! Best drinks ever! If you have any questions feel free to ask! Sdc: Slycat8

Simple question: What are the differences between the Desire Riviera Maya PEARL resort and the Desire Riviera Maya Resort? What do we need to know before choosing? THANKS!

My wife had a conservative upbringing… you didn’t talk about sex and intimacy. The subject was taboo. Myself, always hesitant to share my fantasies for fear of judgement. I’m happy to say we have been able to address all those insecurities and we can be free to learn from each other fearlessly. We are still newbies in the lifestyle role-play stage, agreeing that flirting is OK, we have even talked light “hotwife” challenges. For now, we totally at ease with simply sharing our naughty impulses and deepest longings. For example, while dancing she whispers in my ear, “I’d like to fuck that guy.” I reply, “Well, I’d like to look in your eyes while he is pounding from behind.” No pressure to make it real, just enjoying the banter. Actually, we are interested in going to Desire Resort at some point and wanted to hear from couples that were at a similar stage of exploring the LS when they went to a LS resort. For example, we are interested in the tantric massage seminar, but the group setting my be a little intimidating. What was it like for first timers? I look forward to hearing from you.

where is a good swingers vacation for first time swingers? The wife and I are looking to go to one for our anniversary.

I did not want to hijack the other recent thread that is similar to this... so I started a new one here. also... I recently made a reply to a "Getting Started" type thread, that is along this topic as well. (As a reference.) This type of question comes up a lot on this BBS (scattered all over the place), so I am attempting to get some comparisons and feedback in one place. If you feel so inclined... Please feel free to comment, share your experience, etc., on the following: (One or more... Or any combination you want.) What is your preference? "Date" Webs vs Swingers Club vs Meet & Greet vs House Party vs Resort vs Cruise Why? What has your experience (progression) been like? Started with one. "Graduated" or changed to another because...? ... etc. I've tried finding out details online, but I must be missing something. So... Maybe someone here can clarify a few things for me... For Hedonism II ... a.k.a. "Hedo" "All Inclusive" ... "Lifestyle-friendly" It sounds like sex out in the open, day or night, is acceptable here. Maybe not so much in the dining areas and such... but from what I've gleaned, this is way more than just a simple "CO" resort. (With folks hooking-up in private rooms, or designated play areas on the resort grounds.) Any comments or experience here? For Desire "All Inclusive" It sounds like this is more of just a "Clothing Optional" (CO) facility, and sex out in the open (on the beach, in the hot-tub, etc.) is not looked upon favorably. One LS podcaster I heard called Desire “My happy place”... but it is not real clear (from their web) if Desire (one or both) is “Lifestyle Friendly”. The Desire Cruises seem to be LS Friendly. Also.. There are apparently two Club / Resorts for Desire: Desire Riviera Maya Resort Desire Riviera Maya Pearl Resort What is the difference here, if any? and / or... Here in the "Lower 48"... It seems the only real "Lifestyle Resort" (that rivals places like Hedo & Desire) is: Sea Mountain Lifestyle Resort Sounds like a “Day Visit” facility that is "Lifestyle Friendly", with a few (15) luxury rooms... similar to Hedo & Desire in atmosphere. Any comments or experience here? Any other similar resorts (in the Lower 48)? I am aware of some other "Lifestyle Resorts" that seem more like glorified clubs. Freedom Acres - Devore CA ... just North of San Bernardino, CA / LA Area I am also aware of a few others... but they seem to be just "CO" (Naturist) type facilities. Paradise Lakes Resort … Lutz, FL - North of Tampa http://www.paradiselakes.com/ “Paradise Lakes Resort is a private, clothing optional resort, located in the heart of the nudist capital of the United States - Pasco County, Florida.” (More Naturist than Lifestyle... or so it seems.) Caliente Resorts … Land O Lakes, FL - North of Tampa https://calienteresorts.com/ “Adults Only” https://calienteresorts.com/faq/ (More Naturist than Lifestyle.) “Overt sexual behavior or the appearance of such behavior is unacceptable at Caliente Resorts. Behavior 'never needing an apology' is the norm.” Paradise Valley Resort & Club - Dawsonville, GA http://www.paradisevalleyclub.com/ (More Naturist than Lifestyle.) “Behavior requiring an apology is not tolerated.” (The term "Paradise" seems to come up a lot.) (Maybe it is just a name, in terms of cleanliness, atmosphere, etc.) I know that is a lot... but any light shed on just one of these would be helpful. Many of these sites do not have FAQ pages, for quick & easy answers. I am also aware of the (limited?) crossover between Naturist & Swinger communities. A simple "Copy & Paste" for a link reference would be greatly appreciated (for anything not mentioned here). Most all of this I have heard mentioned on this BBS at some point (in the past few years). Regardless of what the responses here are... I find it pretty amazing that there are so many LS type opportunities available.

Anyone been to Breathless Riveria Cancun? Wife finally agreed to go there since it is not a nude resort but I heard it is kind of Vegas in Cancun. Looking forward to have some adventure with the wife.

We would like some feedback on Desire Pearl. We have been talking about making a short trip to check it out. Probably 3-4 nights. We kind of settled on Pearl because it sounds like, through reading many forums and reviews, that it meets what we think we want from a resort like this. It sounds like it's very laid back, not as much of a late night party atmosphere as the main one and certainly not Hedo but large enough to offer a diverse variety of people interested in anything from just hanging out to full swap. Recent review though are becoming concerning. Declining food and beverage service, hard sells on memberships, basic rules not being enforced such as cell phones in the hot tub area. We've traveled to vanilla resorts in Mexico quite a bit over the last few years and a recent trend in selling these upgrades when you get there is a real problem for us. It segregates people for the sole purpose of making the resort more money. If you have a certain color wristband you can enjoy these amenities only but if you upgrade you can have all these extras. Perhaps an exclusive area, an exclusive restaurant, top shelf drinks etc, something other than a sneer from your concierge. They sell themselves as all inclusive until you get there then it's only truly all inclusive if you pay extra. The other thing we've noticed is the decline in service if you aren't part of the exclusive "club". They won't wait on you on the beach or pick up your empty glasses even. Food and beverage quality has declined also. Then there is the aforementioned segregation. It's not a problem if we aren't looking to swing and we still like the vanilla resorts because I like to dive. I wouldn't dive if we went to Pearl. I'm looking for a different adventure. We don't mind paying for it if the value is there but if we're paying for it we'll want to use it. The problem with the whole concept in a resort where we are looking to meet as many people as possible is that it, in effect, segregates us from a portion of the other guests. We don't care whether they can afford it or not. Their economic status has little to do with whether we want to interact with them in whatever shape or form. The recent reviews I mentioned seem to indicate that Pearl is moving this direction. Some still seem to love it but even long time patrons have mentioned a decline in overall quality of experience. I'd like to hear some feedback from recent visitors about the resort, whether you are newbies or long timers. Is it still worth the trip. Are there other options available that we haven't heard about. I'm looking at booking something pretty quick because we'd like to take a trip in early October if possible.

My wife and I are curious about swinging and have been looking into a trip to Desire Pearl or Riviera Maya. Right now we have mutually agreed that our boundaries would include watching, being watched, group sex with each other, and maybe some soft play with another female. Excited about just being nude and playing around others for a start. I was curious if a resort was the best first choice or if a club would be a better option. Or is there an option we are not aware of? We want to be discreet and are nervous about a club in our area. Any recommendations for a good club in a city for a weekend getaway? Basically looking for the right suggestion to test the waters and not jump into the deep end right away to make sure it is right for us. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

So my girlfriend and I have decided to try this for the first time. She is the one who really pushed for us to go but I'm getting pretty exited about it. She is completely new to this but open and ready, any advice for newbies?

Hi! So we are deciding to go to a swingers resort to get our feet wet. This way we can ease ourselves into it a bit more and kind of immerse ourselves at the same time but maybe go at our own pace. I think the biggest hurdle for us is just that first step. We both are a little nervous on how to start. Anyway, she likes the idea of having sex in public first or at a club. We heard Desire was nice but wondering if there are others. The fantasy would definitely be where we can go to a club and have sex. We are both around 40. She's in great shape. he could lose 15-20 pounds. But we definitely don't want just a bunch of 20 year olds staring at the old people wondering why we are there. Any ideas on the best resort for this in Mexico or Caribbean?

My wife and I are in our late 20s and are very inexperienced in this lifestyle but are curious. My wife has messed around with others but I have not as she isn't sure if she is comfortable with it. We were considering going on a cruise, after googling it we saw one called the Bliss cruise that we were interested in. But reading about cruises both in general and swinger cruises specifically we are a bit nervous that there will be very few couples in our age range and if there are any they will be very few and far between much older couples. I saw something called young couples week at the Hedonism resort in Jamaica but I don't think we will be able make it in July (looks like the only week it takes place). Any advice for vacations for younger couples looking to dip their toes into this? Perhaps my fears on the cruise are unwarranted or perhaps there is another cruise/resort that is somewhat more geared toward younger couples or at least has a lot of them. Any advice would be appreciated.

We are a newbie couple and trying to figure out with what we would be comfortable. Would you recommend one resort over another?

Hi, My wife and I have been to Secrets Maroma Beach 2 times now and we loved it both times! However, next year when we go we want to go somewhere a little more sexy and with more of a party atmosphere. I know about Temptations and it sounds pretty good, but not sure yet if my wife would be down with that plus we like staying at 5 star resorts if possible with top shelf alcohol and I know Temptations isn't 5 star and they don't have top shelf. I know about Desire's as well, but that is a full on swingers resort and I don't think my wife would want to go somewhere like that just yet. Is there any high quality, party resorts, where there is a sexy vibe and maybe even a decent amount of single people? I would like for my wife to meet a guy down there to fuck, and if he were single it would be less complicated. Also wouldn't mind meeting a couple and her and the other girl get it on...we have done that before at Maroma. I know a new resort called Breathless just opened up down there and we were looking into it the other day...it looks pretty promising. Any suggestions?

Wife and I went to Secrets Maroma earlier this year and loved it. Looking to split our trip up in January...4 days at Maroma and 3 at Desire. Can we get the full Desire experience in 3 or should we reverse the number? Thanks in advance.

Hi, we are looking for a swinger resort with: good looking people, real swingers, and serious play rooms! We like Mexico and Costa Rica, and Jamaica might work for us too. We don't want a place where nothing or little happens or where they have beer chugging contests. How are cruises? Thanks for any help!

I was involved the other night at one of our local LS parties in a conversation regarding Desire and Hedonism. We have honestly never been to either or any lifestyle party for that matter. However, since the weather in the Northern Hemisphere is about to get miserably cold I am sure a number of us are going to heading south to get a bit of an escape. So for a couple of days R & R while staying in the lifestyle, which resort are you choosing and why? Are there other resorts you would pick? Anything more domestic?

This is not the first time this has happened to us but we are never sure how to handle it. We are having a drink at a restaraunt bar waiting for our table and this couple starts chatting us up. They weren't bad looking but we both got the feeling they were swingers looking to pick us up. We were close to home so we let it go because we were afraid maybe we know them from somewhere else (like kids school). Very frustrating to not be able to know if someone is a swinger without asking them (which we will never do). Any ideas?

My wife and I found this forum by chance. Any other couples ever been to Secrets Maroma Riviera Maya?

We are a couple from Brazil. We've been in the Lifestyle for some time, but it's difficult to find educated and sophisticated couples to play with in our country. We wish to go to a Lifestyles resort next January, but I couldn't find accurate information about them on the net. We don't care if it's in the Caribbean, the US, or even in Europe, as long as it is the best there is, in terms of accommodation, food, and, of course, the guests. Can anybody help me with information? Thanks.

We are thinking of planning a trip to Desire with a few couples. All of us are very social, and we like meeting new people. Is it better to go when there is a sponsored trip (SDC, SLS, Kasidie, etc.), are the known events or weekends that are particularly good, or is any weekend just as good as any other weekend? We are all in our early 40's. Thanks for any insight!

New to this and wife and I decided to jump in with both feet. Have trip scheduled to Desire Resort in Cancun so we could get a feel of everything and see where we want to go. Wondering if anyone who have been can give us a idea of what to expect?

My wife and I are considering going to Cancun in June. We have never swung and we are not necessarily looking to when we go, but if my wife could find someone she likes, a girl or guy possibly, to invite back to the room we might consider. Any suggestions? We were looking at The Royal Cancun resort, it is adults only, we don't want kids running around. Also is it safe with all the drug cartel stuff going on in Mexico? We didn't see any advisories on the State Department website for that area. Thanks for any input!

We are planning a trip for Sept. But we are trying to decide which one to go to. We've heard some good thing about all three. We went to Temptations in Cabo last year, but the one we are thinking about going to this time is in Cancun. Any info or advise would be greatly appreciated. We are not worried about going to Mexico. We were just down there in April and had no problem. Thanks ahead of time

Hey all, we're so new we're still talking about the LS. Here's the question - we were set on Desire Cancun for our 15th anniversary. Happenings in Mexico have changed our plans to: we don't know what. Any suggestions would be great.

Hello beautiful people, My wife and I are looking for a couples only get away. We are considering Desire Resort in Mexico and wonder if a few of you can give us information on the place. What is was actually like to be there. We are not just looking for play partners, we do need an adult place that allows nudity, open overt sexual flirting between us and a heated atmosphere. Her question to me was: are people having sex all over the place? Not sure if that would be a positive for her or not Thanks in advance.