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Showing results for tags 'hall pass'.
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Claire and Amy arrived home together on Wednesday evening. Amy said, “Claire got her first hall pass”. Then Claire said, “Amy told me all about her hall passes, I’m super excited.” We had a few snacks and a drink or two, then Amy took Claire to the bedroom to let her choose a night dress. She chose a sexy negligée, it maybe was a bit big for her however... Amy said she would be watching a movie on TV, so if Clare and I wanted to go upstairs that’s perfect timing. We went upstairs and laid side-by-side on the bed talking. I asked Claire how old she was when she first made love? She said 15 years ago when she was 17. I told her that I was about 19 and that it was with Amy before we were married. We discussed how many different partners we had had. Claire said about six or seven for her. She said that she was quite promiscuous, and had sex with every boyfriend. I told her about our one experience many years ago when we were camping with friends and how Amy had guided us rewards swinging. Apparently she knew the story about how Amy and Ken had begun having sex with his wife’s blessing. Claire told me about the parties they went to before moving here. They were soft swapping parties with college friends. Then they would have sex with their partner. When she and Pete moved here in April and Lesley suggested swinging they quickly liked the idea. Claire said she had fun with me in July and our threesome with Melissa was sort of OK. She now wanted to catch up where we left off. She put on her negligée. She said look no patch, I take the pill now. I stripped down to my T-shirt and shorts. We began slow foreplay, her nipples were already quite hard as was my cock. "Let’s see how long we can holdout before you fuck me," she said. We played for almost one hour. We did some 69, lots of nipple kissing and body massaging. After two hours we finally said let’s go for it. Claire’s pussy was extra moist. My cock slipped in all the way without any effort. "Hold to it there and don’t move while I count to one hundred," said Claire. At 99 she started making small movements that felt like a sensation of small electric shocks going across the end of my cock. We then changed to Claire riding on top. Perfectly gauged strokes that hit her where she got the best sensation. After a while we moved to laying on our sides with me entering her pussy from behind and squeezing her breasts. This is how we had our first orgasm, with Claire screaming as I filled her with warm cum. We laid for about half an hour before we had our second orgasm with Claire’s vagina oozing warm cum. Claire said that Amy would want all the details in the morning. She said that she would tell the same story to Amy and Pete.
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We started out in this lifestyle very slowly. In fact we had a TON of rules in the very beginning: no full swap no oral no kissing only play together no hall passes Well, it was only a matter of months until all those flew out the window... except the last one. We still mostly play in the same room, which is our preference, but we occasionally play in different rooms if we really like and trust the other couple and it is their preference. With that said, we never do "hall passes" and feel strongly that we never will and never should. NOT putting a judgement on others that do it, but we just don't think it is for us. We have two close couple friends who both do hall passes and we've seen some pretty negative consequences (at least in our opinion) with how it has affected their relationship. We also have some non-close friends who do it who say it works fine for them. So, in addition to the "YES / NO" poll on "Do you do hall passes", we're also curious: When did you start doing hall passes? Did you ever have a rule against them that you broke? were you both 100% on same page with them or was one partner more in favor? if you don't do the hall pass, why? Do you ever think you will? what good and bad hall pass stories have YOU had? Can't wait to hear your thoughts!!! -
When my wife and I first started in the lifestyle, we had some hard rules. One of which was no solo playing. Six months and three BBC adventures later, she decided that the “no solo” play rule was nonsense and asked, more like begged, to be able to play alone five miles away. She was off for summer break. Since I was working 30 miles away and she was home alone all day, I relented. About a week later, I came home from work and she was waiting for me in stilettos and a flowing summer dress sans underwear. The dress was a halter type with a slit all the way past her thigh. She also had the tell-tale twinkle in her eye that she usually gets after she climaxes. Since she usually wears jeans and t-shirts during the day, I knew something was up. She had a cocktail already made for me and an appetizer tray. I was impressed. She led me to the living room sofa and when she sat down, her dress fell open and I could clearly see her bare pussy and one of her nipples. Now I knew something great was about to happen. I asked her how her day went and what was the reason for the seduction. She then said, “I had a great day!” Then she proceeded to tell me in detail what happened. Her BBC friend DJ came by on his tri-wheeled motorcycle to take her for a ride. She was wearing a very short maroon skirt with a yellow sheer top. She had a g-string but no bra. She was not expecting a motorcycle ride. He handed her a helmet and off they went. Since she was in a short skirt, her pussy rubbed directly on the seat as they cruised. The g-string enhanced he friction from the motorcycle vibration on the seat. She nearly came from the ride itself. After they returned to the house, she invited DJ in for some refreshments. Refreshments were quickly consumed and she led him to the bedroom where he helped her remove blouse and skirt. As she dropped her g-string, her pussy stains were quite evident. My wife is usually not very submissive. But for some reason, she enjoys when DJ dominates her and she tries things with him she never lets me or anybody else do. DJ is a former football player with a very muscular physique. His cock is rather short for a black man, only about 5.5 inches long. The girth of his cock however is unbelievable. When he is flaccid, the circumference of his cock is close to the size of a Red Bull drink can. When he is erect, he is almost as round as a beer can. Since he is so wide, he easily hits her g-spot on every thrust which makes her cum in great quantities. After he finished cumming in her pussy, they took a short rest to recover and replenish fluids. As they were laying in each other’s arms, he made my wife get into a kneeling position and open her mouth. He then grabbed her head and started to push his cock into her mouth which was no easy feat given his size. Unbelievable to her, she actually took most of his cock in her mouth and sucked him until he came down her throat. Something she refuse to let me do. Next, he made her lay on her stomach with a pillow under her waist. He then proceeded to flog her ass, thighs, and cunt lips with a leather flog. She always said she didn’t care for BDSM activities but here she was, laying on her stomach with a cum load in her pussy, one in her belly, getting her genitals flogged by a stranger. The more he flogged her cunt, the more she squirmed and moaned until she actually orgasmed. She then felt cool coconut oil being rubbed on and in her sphincter. She told me him was too big but he didn’t listen. He then grabbed her by the hips and pushed his beer can cock into her ass. After an initial painful gasp, she finally became accustomed to his cock in her ass and actually started fucking him. When she grants me the rare opportunity to fuck her ass, she begs me to go fast so I cum quickly and finish. Given DJ had already cum twice, there was no rushing him. He pounded her ass for at 10 or more minutes until he came the third time. As she lay exhausted, DJ dressed and kissed her goodbye. I came home about an hour later. As she related her experiences that day she noticed I was visibly aroused and decided it was my turn to have fun. We went into the bedroom and I started to licking her all over. While the shower she took after DJ left cleaned out her pussy, it didn't quite get all of his cum out of her ass. I tasted another man’s cum for the first time in my life. For some reason, she now enjoys an occasional flogging and ass fucking from me.
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- interracial
- hall pass
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I am a married white female who has been dating a black man for four months now. Our relationship is purely sexual and my husband knows about the whole thing and thinks of it as a turn on. My boyfriend joins my husband and I for a threesome once or twice per month, but for the most part I spend time with him alone. My husband loves for me to bring him home the evidence and listen to my account of what happened when I was out. I was just wondering if there are any other couples out there who have similar arrangements within their relationships. If there are, I would love to talk about our fun.
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Hello. I am wanting some advice. My wife and I have been in the lifestyle for a few years now and have had some great times. I have to travel and spend anywhere from three to six months at a time in different locations for work and she used to travel with me. During this time we played as a couple about 99% of the time with her playing separately on a few occasions which I found hot. Since then we have had a baby and she has settled in one area while I continue to travel. I need to point out that we normally only see each other about one weekend a month. We both played separately while apart and both enjoyed it. We never play without without the others knowledge. Here recently I have been wanting to only play as a couple, we have not played as a couple since she became pregnant and that is something I miss doing with her. My wife is not happy about it and wants to continue the separate play. Am I wrong to ask her to stop playing separately just because my feelings about it have changed?
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On occasion, I get to play a unicorn and I can't help but wonder if people really think I am cheating but don't care because I am a woman. Curious how everyone views couples that play apart with permission...do you automatically suspect they are cheating? Are you more likely to doubt a man/husband or a woman/wife or is your opinion equal, gender not being a factor at all. Do you play with hall pass people? Why or why not?
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Amy and I agreed to hall passes. The other day she said she wanted to use a pass and encouraged me to do the same. We set it up for last night. Her lover would come over to our place and I would go over to Melissa's for a few hours. It was my fourth time in about one month, having sex with Melissa. Amy and Ken have been enjoying themselves for over 2 years. I got over to Melissa's and we talked for a while. She said that she wanted me to kiss her pussy for the longest time and make her cum lots of times. She took off her panties and I kissed and sucked her clit, put my tongue inside her pussy lips and lightly blew air inside her vagina. Each time she had an orgasm we stopped for a while. She held my cock giving an occasional stroke. My stimulation was psychological rather than physical. After about half an hour she said she wanted to fuck me. She said you’re just going to lay back and she would do all the work. She rode me cowgirl style, I couldn’t resist fondling her breasts. She went through a whole series of moves. Long deep, short fast, slow strokes on her g spot. Best of all, with my cock completely hurried inside her she gripped it tightly with her pussy muscles and shook her body. This was mind blowing, I encourage everyone to try it. She told me try not to cum yet, and she took long breaks, with my cock inside her. It must have been an hour before she said you can cum inside me when you're ready. OMG I had been ready for ages and shot my warm sperm into her. She responded with an orgasm, her 4th I believe. We laid for a while, both agreeing that it had been terrific. When I got home Amy and Ken were still making love. I stayed downstairs, listening to Amy’s load moans, ten times louder than normal. We talked after Ken left. This was the first time we had simultaneous hall passes. Obviously all highly satisfied participants. I’m sure it will be happening again soon.
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Wife cool with me swinging, but isn't interested herself
Dolemitegio posted a topic in Swinging Solo
Recently my wife and I have been talking about all manner of sexual exploration: threesomes, lifestyle parties, having sex (with each other) next to another couple, etc. Our communication is open and honest and, ultimately, she is fully supportive of the idea of me sleeping with another woman, but feels like she couldn’t have casual sex herself and she is not interested in a swap or bringing in another person (m or f) into our bedroom. We’ve set the ground rules for it and I’m excited but part of me thinks rather than go out of town with a single buddy and pretend to be single and hook up, it might be easier/more fun/get more understanding from someone in the lifestyle. I’m new to this. Aren’t individual guys a pretty hard sell? Or am I underestimating the amount of guys cool with their wives swinging if they don’t get the other wife in the deal? Guidance for a noob welcome. -
DH here. We're nearly three years into the LS (nine years happily married). Last year, we experimented with DW having freedom to do solo play with a few stipulations. We branched out into separate room at parties and then being expressly positive towards developing FWB's on occasion, including me (I was the hang up, not her holding me back or anything). The thing is, this is a woman's market and DW is terrific at finding play partners; me, not so much. Perhaps I'm too much a gentleman, but I have a difficult time anticipating rejection because a girl I'm flirting with will see my ring and think I'm an asshole. Or she won't believe me that my wife encourages me to pursue sexual chemistry NSA-style. The other day I found great chemistry with a girl I was attracted to, but I had no idea how to take it to the next level, and at what point to make it known that I'm not looking for a LTR, but something NSA, a booty call when the stars align. Anyone with experience of developing NSA's? Neither of us want to advertise anything that communicates that our play partners could be involved with cheating, nor that we are emotionally available for our play partners. But guys, how do you do this without being perceived as a dick? Also, where do you find the most success with these hookups? Online, or in person at bars?
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My wife and I have an open marriage that I haven't actually taken advantage of yet. She has, and she is not really interested in meeting couples. I might work her up to it, but for now she much prefers to have her own boyfriend(s). I can't really blame her either. At first I was so turned on by knowing she was having adventures I had no need of my own. I think that is "a thing", but it surprised her. After a while I just felt like my life was too busy to take on the chore of developing other relationships. Lately though, I've felt like it would be good to be more social. It did my wife a lot of good and I think it would be good for me too. So how does a busy guy with an open marriage go about meeting women in a similar situation? I live in a smallish conservative area, so there isn't a "scene" to hang out in. I didn't do the whole "hang out at bars and pick up chicks" thing when I was single, so I have no skill and little interest in that. I've signed up on a few online sites. Honestly online meeting scares the shit out of me. People are weird. But I'm getting braver and I've logged onto a few "swinger" sites and set up profiles. What I find immediately though is that the categories are "single male" and "couples", and "single males" are ignored by much of the population on the sites. Are onlines sites even worth the bother anyway for me? I've not found any clubs of any sort that cater to the lifestyle. Otherwise I'd go, and my wife would go with me. We might not "do" anything, but she would come and we could get to know the scene and maybe meet some people. There aren't any even close though, so that is out. What are your thoughts? Are there places to meet such people? Or is a "hall pass" really just something you keep in your back pocket for years until the right situation presents itself? -
The wife and I are exploring the hall pass end of the lifestyle, but finding people has proven difficult. There is a small tag on a Kasidie account that indicates this, but few people check it. I couldn't find anything similar with SLS. Clubs? Parties? Just ask people?
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"Hall pass" has arisen in a few recent threads. A few questions comes into my mind. - Have any married or in-committed-relationship members of this bulletin board been given a hall pass but for some reason or another never have used it? If so, for what reason? - Are any of us holding a hall pass but have maybe only once or twice used it? -
We are discussing hall passes for both of us when I have to travel out of town for work. What are your experiences with this? In one sense I am incredibly turned on by giving her a pass and in another I get twinges of doubt about it. When you give a pass to your other half is it an open pass to do anybody or does it come with restrictions?
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I have an enlarged prostate BPH and I'm on medication for this condition - taking Avodart and Flomax. I've been on these meds for the last three years. Although my libido remains as high as ever, I have a very difficult time maintaining an erection. At night, I can't get erect at all. In the morning, I can, but it won't last. My urologist does not want me on viagra, cialis etc. given the BPH meds and a strong family history of heart problems. While I can pleasure my wife orally, and she enjoys it, she misses intercourse, as do I. About a year and a half ago my wife raised the idea of a trial separation. I asked why - why would we split up? She replied just so we could date other people. My response was why do we need to split up? I suggested that maybe what we needed was an open marriage. She changed the subject. In January of this year, my wife brought the idea up. She had talked to some friends of hers and they thought there was some merit in the idea of open marriage. We read up on the subject, and I agreed as a trial I would give her a free pass for the month of March - a month that she was scheduled to be out of Province a lot for her work. Long story short, she packed some rather sexy clothes and ended up making full use of her free pass. In April, we agreed to a one year trial open marriage. So far, I am enjoying it. There is no pressure on me to satisfy my wife. She is being satisfied, and I find the idea of her with other men erotic. She has two men, one in Halifax, the other in Ottawa. This works well as she often travels to these cities as a result of her work. Both are married, in open marriages, and I have talked to them and their wives to verify this. The funny thing is, with the pressure to perform lifted off my shoulders, I actually kind of enjoy my impotence. I can still orgasm and give and receive pleasure. This past weekend, my wife and I were talking and my wife was wondering if we could move things along so she could have a 'local' FWB. I said, why not, along as we follow the rules - married, open marriage, his wife is OK with it. She had already lined up such a guy! However, his wife and I met for coffee on Monday and she has taken a real shine to me and I to her. I explained to her that I have ED, but she says we could have lots of fun anyway. So, it looks like I may be having a date too!
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Hi guys, It's been about a year since really visiting. Last summer while my wife was in a theatre production we flirted with the idea of getting a girlfriend for me that would be my sexual outlet, she was also training for work and was too tired to have sex. We thought about it and talked and talked and had some very passionate sex after long conversations about being with others. Fast forward about a year and the same situation arose. This time I'm actually considering it, I have done a lot of self discovery in the last year and we have grown as a couple and now she's really eager for me to find someone. She truly believes that this is what's right because she is so absent, I also think it would help me deal with my high libido. Ideally the girl would become a certain buddy of mine who would also have sex with my wife when she wants. I know of two couples who have done this with success because of an absent or libido-less partner. What I would like to know if this is too much too fast and if we are potentially overlooking something? I'm going to do some more research on approaching potential girls and also ask that anyone who is familiar with this post their experiences as well.
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Hi everyone, For those who have seen me post here in the past you know my back story, but for those who haven't, here's the Cliffs Notes version: My SO (David) plays, I don't (my choice), I had a hard time with it at first (being in uncharted territory), but came to be accepting and happy with letting him play (as long as I was present). Fast forward to now. I had a miscarriage near the end of the year with what would have been a first child for both of us. As difficult as that was, it was actually a blessing in disguise because my primary doctor insisted I see a GYN for a pelvic and PAP exam. Long story short, the GYN found something not so nice growing on my cervix......I'm not here throwing a pity party, I just wanted to explain how I came to make the choice I did. As the Doctor is trying to take the best course of action for me, I find that there are a lot of days that I just don't feel good and can't be with David sexually in the way that I want. I made the decision a couple of weeks ago to let him have a hall pass because I haven't really felt up to going out and I don't want him to give up all of his fun for my sake. He's been reluctant to use it or to even go out at all, but tonight I just wanted time to myself, so he's gone out now to the club that we frequent to shoot pool and hang out with our friends. I reminded him that he was free to play if the chance arose. He went to his car about an hour ago to call me (as cell phones of course aren't allowed inside), and told me he'd been chatting up a woman that he'd seen at the club a couple of times and wanted to know if I was really ok with him playing. I assured him I was at which time he put her on the phone so I could verify. So now I'm sitting at home, biting my nails, wondering whats happening, and hoping I made the right choice to let him play alone. I guess my question is, for all of you that have given hall passes, were you nervous the first time your SO used it? Did you ask for the details, and if so, when? As soon as they got home? The next day? How in depth did you want them to go in telling you? I just want to know if my being nervous is normal and to know how I might handle asking for all the details later. I know I'm probably making myself nervous for nothing, but I tend to get that way when I'm in unfamiliar territory.......If nothing else, just writing this thread has been a helpful way for me to pass some time and get my feelings out, LOL
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Me and the wife have had our problems, resolved them, fully trust each other and Love each other very much. Just had to get that out of the way lol because I know trust issues should be resolved before anything and I want to make sure everyone knew we did, anyway: We are somewhat new to actually participating in the whole scene, we have had a few threesome with another female and one experience with a couple. All of them were exciting and I had a bit of a performance issue with the couple one (first time for us have a little issue with my size sometimes lol) but anywho, yeah we're new...ish. Recently my wife explained to me how it's exciting and maybe even adventurous to be able to have sex with other people (with all of our swinging rules mostly in place) but tell each other about after. That if I didn't know she feels a rush. I found this arousing for some odd reason but I can see it possibly making me feel a bit funny, maybe. She said I'm free to do the same but then she I guess rethought it and realized it's kind of strange and that we should consent each other before doing it. So basically swinging separately sometimes, and if feelings arise ties are cut. I guess I didn't have a question about all that but rather has anyone else had that whole fantasy type situation arise? To be aroused by having sex without your SO knowing and then telling them and it would be a turn on to both of you? Of course she realized it could pose a big problem and I was comfortable with it but yeah, just wondering if that was just us.... lol
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My wife and I are struggling a little bit because my employer will soon be sending me to England for 6-9 months of training. I'm excited because 1) It's a prestigious, high-profile position, 2) I've never been overseas, and I will have opportunities to travel around Europe a bit. 3) If they are going to invest that sort of time in my training, it's a little less likely they're thinking of laying me off anytime soon. Besides, it's not optional. It's either go or quit my job. In this economy, that's not an option. The down side is a very long stretch away from my wife, our lover, and of course my kids. We really don't have the money for the family to come visit, and Kari wouldn't take more than a week or so off from work anyway. Which brings us to the point of my post. As I have stated before, we are NOT swingers. Though we've played--together--with a number of people that we have a larger, non-sexual relationship with, Kari and I have always had a firm rule that separate encounters are off-limits (except with Anna, obviously). Wondering if we should (in order of our current preference): A) Have sex as the opportunity presents itself, with the understanding that we have to provide full disclosure to the other(s). B) Let Anna and Kari keep each other satisfied while I stick with phone/cyber sex and jerk off a lot waiting to come home. C) Separate with the understanding that what we do during the interim is our own business, that we are free to share or not. D) Treat this as an experiment in having separate encounters, which could continue or not continue once I am back home. E) Make a pact that nobody ever brings up separate encounters, good or bad, and they end when we reunite. We have read so many conflicting things about this. We actually both think the idea of recounting hot encounters to each other would be a turn-on. But if there is one thing we've learned from reading this board, it's that fantasies and reality are often very, very, different. (Anna, BTW, said she's cool with whatever Kari and I decide. We don't have a "three way marriage" by a long shot. Despite our triad relationship, Kari truly is my wife, and Anna is not. So she's not so concerned about it. All she stipulated was no bareback riding!) Any advice for us?
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Let me first apologize in advance if this (or something similar) has been covered and discussed extensively already. I'm sure my situation is not entirely new or original, but it is for me, so I'm throwing it out there. If you've got any experience or advice you'd like to drop my/our way, by all means, please do so. I also apologize for the length but the reality is that this deal has some history to it that I think is relevant. My wife (25) and I (27) have been married for five years, we have a son that just turned two. For several years, we've talked in foreplay about having other partners - but it was just talk for a very long time and nothing more. After the baby was born our sexuality dwindled considerably and until last summer, it seemed like it was going to evaporate into nothing. Well, at some point over the summer we both started seriously (and excitedly) considering the idea of swinging and perused some of the sites regarding it. We put a discreet profile out there, met a couple and after careful consideration, we had them over for dinner and whatever might come. To start off the night, we began fooling around with our own wives but no one ever 'made the move' and it ended up being a nervous and awkward event. They courteously left the next day and nothing happened. We continued to talk to the couple and decided to reschedule another night, but eventually we started getting cold feet about it and just decided to put the site and our vague and fledgling relationship with them behind us. So we did, but with some strange side effects remained lingering. My feelings about her with another guy are in somewhat flux, but for the most part, if it's the right guy/situation, I'm confident I could deal with it - considering seeing her with another man, as for many guys, is a huge turn on. For me, it's even a bigger turn on than getting it off with another woman. But my feelings are sporadic in this regard, so I can't say for certain how I feel. She, on the other hand, doesn't necessarily want to be with another man anymore. What she does want, from both a sexual and emotional angle, is that I explore having a relationship with another woman, but not strictly sexual. She wants me to have a real girlfriend on the side. Now I trust my wife on this. She's fully aware of this site and my posting here, as she'll no doubt read it upon me showing it to her (she may even participate). That being said, I want it to be known that she's not looking to split up our relationship or cover for something she's doing on the side. She's genuinely enjoyed talking about the idea, as far as I can tell, of me doing sexual things and emotional things (dating, caring for, commitment) with another woman. For the average married guy, I suppose this is an easy situation - you get to have sex outside of your marriage at your wife's consent, what could be better than that? And trust me, I see the advantages to it. That being said, I have some serious concerns... My major concern is who the hell would want something like that? How do I approach it with someone? We've done some extensive research on polyamory and swinging, so we're both comfortable with me having another girl who I have a relationship with, but I just don't even know where to begin to look for such a thing. How do you even breach that subject with someone I like without looking like I'm trying to find a clever way to cheat on your wife? I find people are usually on two sides of the bed with regard to having an emotional/sexual relationship outside of the marriage. Either they want to do it behind their spouse's back and are cheating -or- they simply want to experience the openness of sex outside their marriage like the average swinger. I'm somewhere in between the two and I'm not really familiar with how to handle that at all. To complicate things, we're close to my extended family and they are very religious - if something like this were to happen, it would have to be somewhat discrete? Is a relationship like that possible and enjoyable? Would another person ever consider something of that nature? Anyways, I've written a lot and I don't want to present an 'epic ton' of nonsense here. I've read this site from time to time and I figured it was a good place to find open and honest people to bring something like this up and get some good advice. Let me know how you would go about looking for another partner like this? How you would present the situation (I'm married but my wife wants me to have a girl friend) to someone? How would you maintain a relationship like this? What are the pitfalls? What should I look out for? Feel free to ask me any questions that might fill in the gaps. Thanks in advance for any responses... -
Due to my profession, I am away from home for a month to 4 months at a time. I'd like to just stay with her, but there's no work for a U.S. filmmaker in Paris. She can't travel with me due to health issues, money issues and her citizenship. My girlfriend and I are very in love with each other. The separation is difficult, but she suffers the most. Last week, after a heart-wrenching telephone discussion about how lonely she felt, and how hard it was for her to sleep in an empty bed, among other things, I asked her to find herself a lover. The decision was a tough one. We aren't swingers. However, I don't want to lose her because she is lonely and feels trapped by our relationship, and I want someone to take care of her and her needs, whatever they may be, while I'm away. I've never been with a girl that swings, but it is a fantasy of mine. In my mind, I accepted the fact that my GF would be with someone else. Instead of being jealous, I liked the idea that my GF would have someone to give her the some of what I can't while I'm away. She was shocked. Then she accused me of proposing this so I could do the same. I assured her that I had no intention of being with anyone else. I want this to be like a gift of my love to her. She's bi... In fact, she was thinking she was a lesbian before we met. While I was away a previous time, she'd had a sexual encounter with a female friend of mine. The two of them had gotten very close. They were drunk after a party and voila! However, now she was against the idea. She wanted me, not someone else. Since then, she's had our friend sleep over several times. Nothing's happened, but I know they kiss each other a lot. I feel so relieved that my GF is not alone in bed. Then, she proposed that I find her someone. She didn't want to find her lover. So, I asked asked another girl I know, and guess what? She didn't even blink! Of course, my GF was shocked again! She didn't think I would seriously do something like that! LOL! So far, nothing has happened. They've started writing emails to each other. Now, the idea of my GF with other people totally turns me on, and I feel good inside knowing that she's not alone during those cold Parisian nights. She's worried about where this will lead, and even thinks that maybe I'm just trying to get rid of her... to pass her off to someone else. (I can assure you that's not the case. I wouldn't propose this if I didn't trust and love her completely. I just want her to be happy until I can be there with her.) Am I going about this the right way? -
Okay - so this is something that my boyfriend and I do from time to time. We allow each other to play alone. This is for LOTS of reasons. Our schedules don't allow for dual play. We're not interested in what the other is (oh and we do have a HUGE difference in taste). Various reasons like that. WE STILL PLAY TOGETHER TOO - He likes to see me with other men! I like to see him with other women! I was talking to some swinging friends last night about it online and they all started freaking out about it like we were breaking some kind of unspoken swinging rules or something. I was like "Whoa wait a friggin second". We have rules here. First we tell each other before we meet anyone (safety plus courtesy so someone isn't waiting on someone else to get home - KWIM?). Secondly - if we KNOW that there is chemistry there and that the chances of something happening is great then we do warn each other (not always the case - but sometimes you just know!). Thirdly we fill each other in with the details (whether they be written, spoken, etc). Personally - I don't feel it's cheating to play alone AS LONG AS I KNOW ABOUT IT! They feel it's cheating the partner is not present whether or not they know about it. So now I'm curious - where does everyone else stand on this issue? I'm secure enough in our relationship to trust him to know that if anything happened he'd tell me. Or if he met anyone (no matter how innocent it was) he'd tell me. Vice Versa too. Or maybe I've been this way soooo long with him that it's just so much like life to me that it's strange that anyone else is DIFFERENT from it. Not passing judgement, but I'm just curious now. So if you don't mind sharing - please do Best Regards, Nadia
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Dear friends, I am in my late 20's and have been married for almost 3 years, in the past year, my wife has been telling me that I should sleep with other women. At first I didn't really think too much of it, but she keeps insisting that I should do it. Currently I am in Hong Kong on business for 2 months, in her emails she has been telling me that I should go to bars and pick up women, and she is hoping that when I get home I would be a more experienced man with the ladies. Dear friends, do you have this problem at home too, or is there something my wife is hiding behind my back?
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I was reading a post on this subject - I completely empathize with Avanti100 and want to reopen the thread "How do i get involved"... Here's my situation: My sex life is pretty good, considering that this is our 10th year of marriage. My wife says she's pretty satisfied, esp. since she's finding out that not all of her friends get to orgasm with their husbands...whereas she routinely does, with me. I've asked her in a number of ways - for the variety, for the size, for the thrill, etc. - over a period of two years, and she has made it clear that she doesn't want it. But she has made it clear, too, again, over a period of two years, that she has no problem if I want to explore my curiosity on my own, with other women. So, this essentially makes me a single male. Actually, worse - this makes me look like a "cheating" husband. But I find this completely insulting - and rather unfortunate. Here's why: 1) Everyone will have their own motives for wanting to explore partners outside of their marriage. In the same way, if someone doesn't want (e.g., my wife) anything outside, that should be fine, too... 2) Just as communication is important between swinging partners, it's equally important when one partner wants to and the other permits...perhaps, more important. And I fully realize this... 3) So, now, the problem is merely verifying if this situation is true or not - which is quite simple. If everyone is comfortable, a meeting could be arranged, and it should become clear that the married man (me, e.g.) has the wife's permission. Instead, it seems that everyone has this notion that a married man trying to find outside pleaure is somehow "cheating", and all the advice that's given follows from this assumption...It's not fair... Here's why I find this situation unfortunate: Just as my wife respects my desires and encourages me to try things outside, I feel I must respect her choice for not meeting other men for sex. If I don't, then I may have to persuade her to consider the lifestyle, so that I don't appear like a cheating husband - obviously that's not on! The swinging community folks are supposed to be trendsetters and pathbreakers in finding new ways of dealing with our pleasure urges, while keeping the family intact. The fact that they take a risk (of going against conventional morals) shows that they are willing to look at things without the burden of traditional baggage. If that is the case, then why should married men seeking pleasure outside home be looked at with suspicion? There are cheating husbands - but there are also men who have their wifes' permission... What is missing is a suitable bracket, or a label, for such folks... There are forums for husbands with hotwives, and there are forums for cuckolds - and these are accepted categories. But what about married men who have their wifes' permission to seek pleasure outside? And, let me tell you - married men, who have their wifes' permission, can be great company - not just for couples, but even for the single women out there - if only they can drop their suspicion and see for themselves...
