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Showing results for tags 'separate rooms'.
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I didn't see a poll for this one, so thought I'd add it. Mr. intuition and I have discovered that we are more of a separate room couple. This is fairly uncommon in our experience. We have put this in our ads, because we do want couples to know we're open to that - and even prefer it - but it may be a bit of a deterrent for couples who are same-room-only. We have to explain our rationale, that it's not that we don't care what our partner is doing, and it's not that we can't bear to watch it happening, it's that we like to focus on one partner at a time! We're not into that sensory overload thing that some people like about group sex. It's a little distracting. We're also not big into having an audience, either, even if it is our own spouse. We were just talking about this on the way home from a playdate last night, where we were all together in the same room. Mr. intuition mentioned the awkwardness of trying to "keep pace" with one another. If they're doing this, I guess we should be doing this, if they're doing that, we should be doing that. I mean, we know we don't HAVE to, but you feel a certain pressure to keep pace with one another's energy. After one half has worn themselves out on a go-round, they want to just take a break and recover, get a drink of water, get a snack to recharge, find out what the score is on TV, curl up and cuddle for a bit (yes, we love to cuddle), talk to each other, etc. Give it about 5-10 minutes and we're back at it again. But when everyone's in the same room, it's hard to relax like that if the other half is still going at it. We love the relaxed pace of each doing our own thing in separate rooms, giving each other a friendly slap on the ass on the way to the bathroom, poking our heads in the door and giving each other a smartass thumbs-up seeing they've fucked their partner into a state of blithering oblivion. ("Way to go, Hon!") And we like the kink of listening to the sounds coming from the other room, and how hit gets us going again, too. What's your preference, and why?- 12 replies
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We here so much about not doing separate rooms; can anyone share their experience? Our first was separate and it was a good experience. In fact I think it was hotter than same room because thinking about what was going on in the other room in lieu of watching it was somewhat of a mystery. Talking about it later was great. I think sometimes people in same room situations can't let go fully. Your thoughts. (I do understand there is a level of safety concern but with the right people it could diminish the safety issue.)
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Would appreciate for, stories, and experiences of a date night swap during which the two swapped couples go out separately for the evening and then trade back at the end of the evening or the following morning. I suppose it could be considered simultaneous hotwifing or separate room swinging of sorts. Have any tried it? What did each couple do and how did it go? Thanks in advance!
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Hi, Which of you has had sex in separate rooms? Did you like it?
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Does any of you other newbies feel the same way i do when it comes to being in the same room with your husband, bf, or partner? I mean when we started into this, one of our rules was always to be in the same room, but a situation came up where we were seperated and i found it easier for me. I don't like my fiance watching me enjoy sex with another man. I can't get get into it. I also have a guilty feeling of being with another man in front of him. He says it does not bother him. it does not bother me to be in the same room with him and another girl, but i can't watch him brcause, yes it do get a little jealous. Especially when he is making her moan and groan. I rather for us to go do our thing with the person and share stories afterward. Am i trying to change the rules? and am i wrong for it? I asked for the newbies to answer this question, but i would also love to hear what others may have to say. Thank you all for your responses.
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Hello all. I have a question. My wife and I have started swinging. We have had one couple, not so good. Wife's blood sugars dropped causing her to almost pass out. So we left and got her what she needed. We then had a MFM and that wasn't good. The guy could not get hard, which made the wife feel down on herself. We then had another MFM. This one was great, everything went well. Then with my work we don't have a lot of time to play. We both can play alone as long as we tell the other. Wife has played with 2 other guys. We got really busy in our lives and stopped. Well a year and a half went by and things are slowing down in life for us. Wife has this one guy just joking and teasing the wife about playing. I told her that sounds like fun. The guy even said about a 3 some. The wife comes back yesterday and tells me that she doesn't feel right about this. She then goes on to say that she is not comfortable with me in the room, she says it's not natural. She said she didn't know how to tell me after the first MFM or couple. I asked if she enjoys the one on one and she said yes, it more natural and comfortable. I was just wondering if anyone else has had this happen? -
I wrote earlier about heading to a swing club with my GF for the first time. She suggested and I said definitely Yes. She is a gorgeous 30 yo Latin. I am much older but we have a lot of fun. My problem is that she told me that if there are any single guys at the club that she is attracted to, she would like to be one on one with him in a private room. I want her to have fun but this through me for a loop. I guess I'll just go with the flow but would really want to be there when she gets fucked. What's it like to see your partner go off alone to a private room with another guy?
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So what is everyone's take on safety when playing away from your partner? The topic of safety was brought up in the Do you prefer same or separate rooms when playing, and why? thread, and I thought it deserved a thread of its own. As I mentioned in my reply, I don't think I've ever really been worried about my safety. Mr. intuition and I don't play separately - as in, we don't go on separate playdates. We always play together; we have not yet explored the separate-play option, as I'm not sure it's our thing. So because we are always on the same premises with one another while play is going on, I have never really felt myself to be in danger. The assholes who would do me harm are weeded out long before anyone gets beyond the bedroom door anyway. We have never attended a house party of any size, nor have we played at clubs. I suppose this does bring with it added concerns due to the size of the venue and that you don't know everyone there. I'm not that concerned with Mr. intuition's safety, because he's a pretty big guy and can take care of himself. Although I have heard some horror stories about psycho couples who have drugged the husband to "get him out of the way" so they could have their way with his Rohypnol-loaded wife. Yes, I guess that does concern me a little. But just like anything in life, trust is one thing, but that doesn't mean you should ignore obvious warning signs. Awareness is part of being responsible. As for myself, I'm not that worried either, even if somebody did try getting a little pushy with me. I'm not exactly petite, and if you think you're going to try some alpha male bullshit with me, buddy, you'll get the fuck off me if you value you nutsack. Because God help you if I get a hold of that thing. I've never been sexually assaulted, so I find this deep-seated rage confusing. I don't know where it comes from, but the idea of someone trying to take liberties with my person without my say so - just because they think they can get away with it - makes me afraid...for them. I'm quite serious. I am not naturally a violent person, so I'm actually very disturbed by the unholy desire I have to do bodily harm to assholes like this. I've never really been afraid for my own safety; just for theirs. What are your safety concerns? Have you had any bad experiences in this?
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We recently played separately for the first time with a couple that we have known a while and have played together (same room) four other times. The same-room play was great so when they asked about separate play, we obliged. After receiving some amazing oral sex, I asked the guy what I could do for him. He whipped out a strap-on dildo and wanted me to fuck him in the ass. He said he really likes anal/prostate stimulation but his wife refuses to do anything that has to do with anal. He never said anything before during same-room play. This has happened to me quite a few times. Normal same-room play with a couple, but once it gets to separate play, I get strange fetish requests. Some are not totally kinky, like anal sex which I do actually like, but some are out there. Does this happen to anyone else? What is the strangest request you have gotten?
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We all have our preferences when it comes to swinging. One of the big ones is "Same room or separate room" swinging. We had a poll on this very topic for years, but sometimes it's nice to start fresh and see what the current generation of swingers board members think about this topic. Votes are private, so share your opinion, even if you don't feel like following up with a post below. -
Just curious, those of you who do full swap....how many of you insist on same room? I'd make this one of those polls if I could figure out how....lol.
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For those of you who choose to only play in seperate rooms from each other, what is your reasoning? Is it because one partner can't concentrate when the other partner is there to watch? Is it jealousy? Is it something else?
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We were curious as to what parameters you set when swinging separately: same room, same house, or all the above? Wife and I are an all the above couple. -
This poll is only for those who prefer — or choose only — to play in separate rooms. -
For those couples that play separately in different rooms, how do you deal with the safety issue involved? For men how do you gain the trust in another man that he will not get out of line with your wife in a sexual situation, i.e…pushing her beyond what she wants to do. Women how do you come to trust a man enough to really relax in a sexual situation to where you are not concerned that he will over power you into doing something you don’t want to do? Although Ted and I have no problems with the idea of playing separately and actually have fantasies of doing something along these lines, there is a major fear factor involved for both of us. For me personally, there are only three men that I know that I would feel comfortable with in a sexual situation not to harm me or push for more than I was willing to give. And for Ted, he has the fear that someone would try to push me and he wouldn’t be there to help me out. This being the main reason Ted and I only play together. As long as he is there I know that I am safe and he knows I am safe. I was just curious as to how those that do play separately deal with this. Teresa
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Hi all, Ursula and I are planning on going to a club in the near future. We've chatted with a few people here and we've talked with each other. One point that we seem to be at odds with most swingers is as follows: It seems that the "typical" couples swap is initially same room sex. Alot of people are asking us if we're ready to watch each other. Well...is this is how I would envision a swap. We meet with a couple. We go to a restaurant/lounge type of place. Ursula and the other man go to a table, myself and the other woman go to a table and we eat/drink/talk maybe even dance, if it's available with our prospective partner for a while. I guess this could happen at a club as well...don't know. If everybody is agreeable, we continue on. At that point, it seems like, if we swap, everyone is urging us to do it in the same room...it's supposed to be a big turn on for me to watch Ursula and her to watch me. Well...maybe it is. But, is it strange or even dangerous (i.e. too much jealousy/attachment) for us to consider that we would like to be near to each other (i.e. adjacent rooms, where we could hear each other) without being right on top of each other and watching each other with another partner? I guess I'm just wondering why it's almost 100% assumed that, if we swap, I will be right there watching her get laid. Thanks all.
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I was going to post this in the same/separate rooms thread going on but I thought it might be more appropriate as another thread. Many seem to have the opinion that same room only couples have issues regarding "letting" their SO be alone. Here is a twist on the subject that I have pondered for a while. I do not mean to insult anybody and I am not suggesting that all separate room couples have issues but here goes.... I personally think that many couples that swing ONLY in separate rooms have issues of their own. Could it be that they are only comfortable without their SO and if so, Why? Can they only have a good time and let loose if their SO isn't there, again, why? They don't want distractions...what does that mean? If you can't be comfortable with your SO there then maybe they should examine why. Many say these things without really explaining. To me if you can't be yourself in the same room as your SO says something. So to those that are separate rooms only, tell us why in detail. Explain distractions. Explain why you can only be yourself only when alone. Explain to us why it let's you try other things you wouldn't do with your SO. Now to me, THAT is an issue. Maybe I'm missing something.
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This weekend we had a full swap in separated rooms. We enjoyed it very much, they were a fantastic couple, but after we finished may wife and I were sharing our experience on our way back to our hotel. Our main question is if being a “full swap swinger” the ultimate goal for a “mature swinger” ? All the people talk about the steps on how to became a swinger and it looks that is never the first thing to try. Step 1. Start communicating with your partner Step 2 Search the web or go club. Or meet some in your neighborhood. Step 3 Discuss meeting arrangements. Step 4 Do a soft swing Step 5 Same room threesome or swap Step 6 Different room full swap. Step 7 ????? We may repeat the experience in the future but we both felt that something was missing in our experience. We didn’t see each other enjoy the full swap as we do the same room swap. What is what we should be looking for in a different room swap? What did we miss ? I think step 5 is a lot more enjoyable to us because we can see each other. Also can somebody tell us what should be step 7 or 8 in the swinging community. What would be the “ultimate experience” for the most experience swinger ? Thanks
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Wife and I are currently involved in what is beginning to look like a long term threesome with a great single gent we met about six months ago. We're currently enjoying a mm-f relationship and have gotten together, as a 3some, three times so far but the wife and our new lover have not been alone with each other yet. We've read that it is good for the wife and new partner to have some private time with each other so as to get a bit more comfortable in the relationship in learning each others likes and desires in sex. We've discuss letting this happen on our next get together with him. I will be in the house but they will be in a bedroom without me. My question is does any one have any opinions on this, pro or con? How long should I let them be alone together? Any help in this matter would be appreciated.
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Do you do both same room and separate room swinging? I have had couples ask me this of my hubby and I, and was just wondering if this is common or not?
