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Showing results for tags 'swing-curious'.
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How do you feel about couples that "swing" where the wife is the only one that plays with other people? My wife and I have an arrangement that she can sleep with other women as long as I am there and watching, even if the other woman is married and me and the other guy watch. We have also talked about, but have not done this yet, her sleeping with another guy and I would watch/have a MFM with my wife. My wife is not comfortable with me sleeping with other women at this point, and honestly I am completely fine with that. I feel we both get A LOT of excitement out of this arrangement. Her for obvious reasons, and me because I get to watch my wife and experience my deepest fantasies! Once again we have not invited another male into our bedroom yet, but I think we both feel we would be willing to try now to see how we feel about it. I have heard arguments that this is "one-sided" and will lead to disaster for our marriage! That the only way we should proceed is if my wife is willing to allow me to fuck other women as well. I don't feel that this is one-sided though, I feel that I am very much included in the activities and my wife is doing this for me. Any thoughts?- 80 replies
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The wife and I have always talked about another person in the bedroom. key word talked. A short time ago I had mentioned that maybe it is time to pursue this idea. To my surprise she said sure. Now this is our idea. Has anybody ever started out with strippers? I feel this is possibly the easiest way to find out if both parties involved are going to be able to handle the situation. I'm hoping to get a private show for her and sit back and see how it affects me. I've already said that I'm probably not ready for her to jump right on and give it hell, but a more aggressive touch session is what I'm thinking. Has anyone ever explored this idea and how did it go? Also, if anyone has done this out in Vegas, what agency did you use? We are planning to be out in Vegas in October and want to start looking for an agency. -
Rather exciting news for us as a first. We have found on a lifestyle site a couple that intrigued us. We exchanged initial e-mails and there is some possible interest. Of course, they have yet to open the e-mail with our photos attached so that could be the "deal breaker." (Ha) In any event, I have discussed with my wife that we don't have to do "anything" and that either one of us can pull the plug at any time. I have also done much to assure her that this is not so much about "getting strange" but having fun as a couple and growing together. I really would have no interest if she were not involved. We shall see how this goes. This is a huge step for us as we have never met a couple for possible lifestyle fun. Personally I am a bit nervous and wanting to move slowly myself. If we do meet, I hope they are not pushy nor expecting we physically engage on a first meeting (the latter I just cannot see us being comfortable with). Of course, they could always find us to be "Shrek and Fiona" and that would end it before anything possibly started. Still I remain excited just to see what happens. MrMarvin -
So hubby and I have said we would like to take a visit to a swingers club and we have put out some feelers on a site and gotten a handful of emails. We are hoping to meet those we are interested in the club that night. First we want to make sure that those people are aware that we may not be ready for play that night. As we get closer I can feels myself getting cold feet, and fears. My hubby reassures me we won't so anything that I am not ready for, and I know he is 100 percent truthful in that. Were you nervous you first night going to the club? Did you end up playing with anyone your first night? Whenever you did have your first time did you jump in two feet or did you dip in slowly and get "used to the waters" before proceeding further? -
Just now joined this forum and want an honest answer. My wife are thinking of going to a swingers club but don't want to feel out of place. We are both 58 years old but still in very good shape. I run and she wakes every morning to do her pilates routine. Seriously looking for honest answers. Thanks, -
The hubby and I have decided that we really want to give this lifestyle a try. We have discussed it for over a year now. The problem is, we have no idea how to begin. I have looked around at some potential clubs, parties, etc but it's hard to tell what kind of places these are. I don't want our first experience to be a bad one. Any suggestions on how to know which clubs are good and which ones arent? -
Ever since I got married 2 years ago, I can't stop thinking about sharing my wife. She is a very good looking Latin woman (30) and that makes it way more exciting for me to think about sharing. She talks dirty during sex but i have zero clue how to start the process of convincing her. I need help...lol. -
Hello! My name is Ashley and I'm new around here. Hubby and I are not swingers yet, but we did discuss it. It was actually my idea and I though he'd jump at the opportunity, but he didn't quite do so. He said he understands 100% why I want to try swinging and admitted that he finds it a nice idea in theory. He said he is confident in our relationship and feels very secure with me. It wasn't me so much that concerned him as much as how he believes men are treated in the lifestyle. Apparently he knows a couple that used to swing and the male half told him that all swinging eventually boils down to the women have sex with each other and maybe a select few men. The other married men basically stand around playing with themselves and are treated as if its a privilege that they are even allowed to be there. The friend told him that the women get so close and free with each other that eventually they prefer other women over the men. He said even the most considerate guys get swept aside. The couple hubby knows is still together, but they stopped swinging since it became too much of an emotional chore. Hubby said he would feel pathetic playing with himself and he doesn't care to watch me have sex with another woman (weird I know) for eye candy. The other women aren't exactly my reason for wanting to swing although I would be open to the experience if it happened. We discussed that and he said he understands my feelings on the matter. He also admitted he was a bit worried that I might find I prefer women to men if I try it although he wouldn't hold me back because of that. Hubby ultimately said if I want to swing on my own he would support that. I felt my love for him explode to new heights that he trusted me so much but at the same time I was so bummed he didn't want to partake too! He felt I would probably have a more fruitful experience without him anyway since 4 way chemistry is hard to come by and no one should have to "take one for the team." He also said it would ruin the experience for me if I knew he was getting sidelined as that happened to his friend. Has what I described happened to any of the guys out there? How did you deal with it? How did the ladies handle it? -
I've posted a few times and received great advice from many of you. My wife and I have not progressed much in the swinging department but we've been communicating much more about the topic. My goal is to make her feel comfortable about taking our sexuality to the next level a threesome. We've been together for 18 years and I still get hard just looking at her, I think her self image is holding her back. I tell her how hot and sexy she is, and guys everywhere find her attractive. I'm trying to create the perfect scenario, at least what I think she would want. S he's open to the idea of a mmf but is afraid of what if she enjoyed herself too much and how I would react? I tell her I'm very confidant and I want see her eyes roll to the back of her head. I tell her the more she enjoyed it the more it would turn me on! I tell her her I want to see her in ecstasy and yes of course it's for me too. She is very beautiful and deserves getting turned and having total pleasure, even by a a better looking, more endowed, longer stamina lover than me. I think I'm fine with it as long as I'm there for it. So anyway, I think I'm pushing a little much because I'm chomping at the bit. I give her full disclosure and she'll answer me comfortably but never has a follow up question for me. I tell her very vividly how sexy it would be to see her handling two cocks. Should I just hang back and let everything resonate with her. She is never surprised or disgusted with my thoughts. She's just reserved? I would say mildly interested? -
My fiance and I have are new (our very first time) to the lifestyle. We have our first date with a couple that have lots of experience. We are going directly to the couples home and we are very aware that something will happen. I am wondering just what to expect? I am not a shy person but I know that I am going to feel withdrawn and somewhat up tight.........I will need to have a drink or 2or 3 to relax. Can anyone give me any idea of what we may expect?- 7 replies
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What is a horny bi curious husband to do? In a perfect world my wife and I would befriend another bi curious couple to explore and play with. Reality is she is opposed to swinging, and I am raging hard dreaming of sharing a hard cock with her. In Iowa it is hard pressed to meet the right couple to initiate us. One turns to the infamous Craigslist, but with little success. There just has to be a better way. I know that out there is a bi couple waiting to discover us as well.
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Anybody have any advice or questions for a new to the lifestyle couple? -
Hello eveyone, I am super new to this site and this lifestyle. I am here mostly for information. I am married to a female. I am interested in learning about this lifestyle. At first look, I thought it would have been creepy but then I actually read the comments and posts I was pleasantly surprised! I love all of the feedback that everyone gives it really seems honest and friendly, not creepy! I am a large framed guy 6'3 about 250 and my wife is much smaller than me she is 5 years younger than me. I am celebrating my 35 at the end of the week! My wife recently asked me if I wanted to have a threesome FMF for my birthday. My wife has always wanted to have a threesome and I had the typical guy response of heck yeah! Then I actually started to think about it and want to gather info. I have read a lot on this site about FFM and MFM and I don't think I would be ready to have another M in the mix yet. I grew up catholic and sex was love and blah blah... I have recently started to come out of my shell and actually entertain the idea of swinging and involving more than just me. My wife was not raised catholic and she is freer with sex. She is educated about it and thinks about sex differently than I do. She see is as "just sex" and I can't wrap that in my brain. I am trying to figure it out in my head and not think about how I was raised but how I feel about it. I do have a jealousy issue but I think early in our relationship it was because I was super insecure about myself. I have grown since we were first together. I don't want that statement to have people say.... this lifestyle is not for you. I have read that ALOT but I disagree; I think I would be able to like it. We have been together for 15 years and married for 7. I have been with 2 others beside her and she was with 1 besides me. I love her to pieces and I don't want her to feel that she is missing something because she wasn't able to explore with more people M or F. Our sex life used to be not good because I was selfish. I wasn't able to make her cum when I was inside her. She would always cum when I would go down on her. Then I started to think about her more and find out what I was able to do to make her have an incredible experience with me. I have gotten her to open up to me and trust me so every time we have sex I can usually get her to cum once or twice before I do...sometimes not. But we always talk and make sure we are both satisfied before we are done. I want to make the right decision for both of us and not cause any weird feelings because we chose to take this next step... Well, that is my story and I just wanted to stop by and introduce myself. Thank you for reading! -
She wants to swing with thuggish ex lover
intersocial posted a topic in Finding People to Swing With
My girlfriend and I have been together for about 6 yrs now (moved in year 1). After months of discussion we both feel open-minded (and freaky) enough to give the lifestyle a go. Yesterday we had a good long talk, airing out secrets we kept from each other in regards to cheating early on in our relationship. Mine was more of a rehashing of my extensive rap-sheet, but she revealed that she did sleep with her ex-lover around yr 3 after we moved in agreement to start anew. It was an isolated incident for which she was ashamed, however I have little room to be upset in light of my long list of transgressions. We are now in a happy healthy relationship. After mild hesitation she agrees that she too would enjoy the passion of bringing more fun into the bedroom. She then suggests that she could get in contact with her ex-lover as he would be her ideal candidate given her social inhibitions (shy). She says that they had limits to their past relations (i.e. no kissing, cuddling, etc). As much as I want to find issues with this, I am equally intrigued (I've always had a thing for the dangerous and uncertain). This guy is a bit of a thug and do not know how that will fare with my ego (I am very domineering in bed). I am a first time poster and would like any advice or similar stories in relation to my current dilemma. -
I have posted before and have appreciated all the thoughtful feedback. My wife brought up swinging a while back and we continue to do our research. My question this time regards bisexuality. I am not at all bi-curious, but my wife has some curiosity. Her concern is that if she tries it and does not like it, how much will that limit who we can play with? I think her curiosity is two fold. On the one hand she is legitimately interested in exploring sex with a woman. On the other hand I think she feels that it helps my ego to think that her main motivation is to be with women. She has not said it specifically, but I suspect that may be the case. As for me, I don't care what her motivations are. Obviously my motivation is to have new sexual experiences with other women, so I am fine if her motivation is to have sex with other men. All that aside, which is a non-issue that she thinks may be an issue, what happens if she does not like having sex with women? Will that greatly limit the number of people who will play with us?
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I'm a 27 yo male and Im excited about swinging with my gf. Never done it but I think it's exciting. My current gf is not extremely keen on such things and it may take a long time before she is ready. Knowing that things like swinging is what turns me on a lot, should I still marry someone who is not a swinger or should I keep looking for a gf and potential wife who is up for swinging? I think it will be ideal I find someone with the same kinky interests, but how do I find such a girl and potential partner?
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My wife and I have been married for 8 yrs and have 2 kids. About 2 months ago I asked her if she would be interested in "webcam" chat sex. At first she said absolutely not in a million years, I'm not doing that. A couple of weeks later I signed us up for chaturbate, but had to ask her for her ID and a picture of herself holding her ID, she was very very reluctant, but obliged. We have been camming for almost 2 months now, and she absolutely LOVES it, she even watches the number of people coming into the room, and wants us to be in the "top cams" I still can't believe that she's doing this:) She has a VERY high paying corporate job, and has said NO WAY, NOT Happening to the idea of swinging. Although I think that by her taking the webcam step, hopefully she will want to take the step to swing. Please tell me what you all think!!!! Thanks, -
My girlfriend has been quite reluctant and hesitant about swinging or the idea of it. It's really new to both of us. When we have sex I used to bring up the idea of swinging and us being with another couple... she has been keeping quiet. Today I brought it up again and she played along... kept telling me about how she is imagining how another guy is fucking her, etc. Seemed to turn her on quite a bit. And she even mentioned how I'll be enjoying the other girl, etc.... all in the heat of the moment. And after that we didn't speak about it. This is heading in the right direction isn't it? I don't think we are ready to swing yet or anything... but I'm ready to escalate our fantasizing to a new level... any suggestions? I'm very interested to know who or what type of guy she fantasized about, etc.
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Hi all, was just trying to figure out if this is ok in the swinging community? My wife and I are thinking about going to a lifestyle club near our house, but are not sure if we want to get into swinging completely and was wondering if what we want to do is acceptable, and if it is ok how to tell people at the club what are intentions are. We want to have interactions with other couples or other women but my wife or myself don't think she would like to be penetrated by another man, or have oral. We would just like it to be fingering of woman on woman and maybe another man play with her or she could give him a hand job, or use toys on her. She thinks she could go for this and she thinks she would enjoy this she just does not want to be penetrated by another man or have oral with either man or woman. Would this be ok at a club, and if so is there an easy way to explain myself. Thank you all very much for the help. -
Ok, I know the "I want to but she doesn't: How do I talk her into it?" has been beat to death on the forums. I'm afraid I come from something of a traditional upbringing, and I'm still trying to get my mind around everything. With my wife, I was trying to be very respectful, and then she said "So, when are we going to have sex?" That's just to show you how clueless I can be. We were talking about fantasies, and she asked me "Would you be comfortable seeing me making out with someone else?" She is the first one I've played with toys with, and we've had great results. (Thank you AngleKin and Julie, BTW.) I'll be the first to admit I have a lot to learn, but I'm trying to get my mind around reaching outside the box. A little background: My first wife was a preacher's daughter who said "Sex is for the man." I know I'll have a lot of you laughing hysterically, but I'm still moving past that way of thinking. I followed AngleKin's advice on use of light bondage and a vibrator to tease her, and she loved that. We're playing with toys now, and I think she's having to instruct me. Any advice on how to respond to her inquiry? (Yes, I'm willing to change my name to "CluelessGuy1964!")
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Hi all, So the main reason I started coming here is because I've been having a lot of thoughts about what it would be like to see my girlfriend with another guy. My girlfriend and I are both 23 (she's a knockout) and have been dating over 15 months. Though I've been having these thoughts I just can't figure out why and what the actually experience would be like. So what's it like? Best parts about it? And what about it is the real turn on for you? John
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Hi, Just new to the forum but have already really enjoyed reading some of the advice threads. My wife and I, of 20 years, started sharing our fantasies in the bedroom about 1.5 years ago. This developed to discussing it while perhaps watching some sexy movie. It became apparent that we both really liked the swinger fantasy. We discussed months ago about what it would be like to turn it into reality but both dismissed it. We felt, that it might not be for us. That was a few months ago. Recently I started thinking about it again and decided it was time to see if we could chat about it in the cold light of day. I found to my surprise, that while we were both nervous, we could in fact discuss it no problem. We then agreed to at least look into and research what it could mean. I joined a website and soon started chatting with a local couple who had done it once 3 years ago and were keen to find a couple they could resume it with. To cut a long story short, at short notice I agreed to meet the guy for a coffee. He was a real nice guy and we had a lot in common. I made it clear we were just still thinking about this and may decide not to go ahead with anything other than just a friendship. We agreed perhaps the wife's should meet. To my surprise my wife did so and really enjoyed meeting the other lady for a coffee. We are kind of shocked by how easy we both seem with it so far. We are committed to nothing other than maybe just yet. We are surprised however at each other. We have a strong relationship and a good sex life. We have only recently started really deep communication on our wildest thoughts but even they seem to come easy for us both. We love each other deeply, have two beautiful kids and would never want to risk our marriage for fun. I can see however that for the right type of marriage this could be great. The increase in communication on this topic alone has taken our sex to a whole new level. We can't keep our hands off each other. Interestingly our fantasies are identical. I want to see another man pleasure my wife and she wants to see me with a woman. Neither of us would complain about the experience for ourselves either! Do we sound like the people who are suited to this? Any alarms anywhere anyone can see? Cheers -
Hello I should probably start by saying this is something totally new to us and the idea was put to me by my wife, it does pose a few questions! So here goes... Been married for 8 years, wife is very open with discussing how attractive other women are, she is not the jealous time at all, she has suggested that we find a stranger and have a threesome because she likes the idea of sharing another woman with me and having another woman pleasure her as well. To be honest, I'm a little scared and unsure how this sort of thing works! We quiet often stay at hotels just to chill, to get away from our busy lives and she's said that this is the place that we could initiate a threesome. She also said she would prefer to do this before we have children, which to me makes sense and suits us both. My questions are: Is this sort of thing common for wives to want to watch their husband be pleasured by another woman? What are the dangers/risks? Is this something that is tricky to initiate with a stranger at a bar, located at the hotel we will be staying at? Pro's/cons?
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Mr. V and I are getting really close to where we want to stop talking about getting into this LS and want to actually do it! :-) And we've pretty much decided we want our first experience to be MMF. But now there's the question of exactly how to get there from here. As we see it there are several potential scenarios: Pick up a single guy at a vanilla bar and take him back to a hotel room we've rented Go to an on-premise club Find an off-premise spot or a meet & greet type thing and take someone back to a hotel room Find a single guy on SLS. If he's local we'd still have to get the room (going back to his place or ours is a deal breaker) but since we live in a high-tourism area there's a pretty good chance he'd already have a room rented. Some other option that we haven't even thought of Just wanted to get advice from those that have been in the LS longer than us. Any pros/cons you feel would be advantageous to us as we try to decide how to get from Point A to Point B?
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Hi! We are Allen and Christy. We are a mid-40's couple, married 14 years, and have two great kids. We are curious about swinging, and looking for advice from others who are experienced. Our desires are a little different in that what turns us on is Christy playing with other guys. It is something we have fantasized about and talked about for years. We enjoy watching erotica that features a wife with another man, or men. We feel we are ready to take it the next level by learning more about it from couples who enjoy this. In other words, we are seriously considering turning this into a reality, but we want to make an informed decision. Any help or advice will be greatly appreciated. Allen and Christy
