Search the Community
Showing results for tags 'triad'.
Found 7 results
-
Back in November, my husband and I decided to welcome a friend of mine into our relationship (poly) after talking about it for over a year. I was under the impression we had zero issues in our marriage. If I had the slightest feeling that we did, I never would have welcomed her in. Anyway, fast forward to now. He asked me for a divorce because he "only loves me as a friend" and they are together. I'm working through those issues and I'm getting some closure. My question for you guys is, I still like the idea of a poly relationship, but I would like to be the addition into the relationship because I know what it is like to be hurt in these situations now and I know I wouldn't do that. Is this a good idea? (Maybe not right now, but eventually.) -
I feel kind of foolish posting this after bragging so much about how strong and functional our poly threesome is (was)...but it's for that very reason that I owe SB people an update: Anna, Kari and I are all going our separate ways. Anna and I recently learned that my wife Kari has been having an outside relationship in secret, keeping it from her best friend/committed lover as well as her husband for over two years. During that two years, the two of us blissfully ignored the obvious signs that she was cheating. My wife even told me that she was lesbian, not bisexual, and she no longer wanted me to penetrate her or have one-on-one sex together. I was enough of a sap to agree to her terms. When my wife eventually brought the other woman into our sexual circle as a playmate, she out-and-out lied and the woman play-acted that she was a "bi-curious" platonic friend. The truth only came out when the "other woman" confessed to Anna to relieve her own guilty feelings. Anna told me and when the two of us confronted her, Kari cried and cried, but in the end decided that she doesn't want anybody, even the two people who've cared about her most, to have any claim over her body or, more importantly in her view, her mind. She even said it was our fault for making her feel guilty for who she needs to be. If she'd wanted to openly pursue other sex partners -- WITHOUT lying and cheating -- I would have easily let her, rather than end the relationship, and so would Anna. But in her heart, Kari feels like she doesn't need to ask for forgiveness. I can't share my life openly with somebody who won't promise to share just as openly in return. While I'm deeply hurt, Anna is devastated. Anna and Kari had been inseparable since middle school. We were talking about having her move into our home, now she's too hurt to even come over. Even more heartbreaking is what this is doing to MY relationship with Anna. Wven though the two of us are still deeply in love, to try and go on together without Kari would be just too strange to consider. Kari was always the "queen bee" among us, and she'd be a painful phantom partner even in her absence. We're talking it through and processing it together, and we've comforted each other in bed several times, but Anna and I ultimately have decided we both need to "grow on" to something totally new. I've had a standing offer from my employer to move up the ranks, but only if I was willing to relocate to another city. Up until now, I haven't been willing to move because I thought it would leave Anna in an awkward position of leaving her whole life for us or choosing to sever things. Now that Kari's deceit has severed everything, I'm going. My daughter will be staying with her mother, which nobody is crazy about, even Kari, but she's in the middle of high school and it wouldn't be fair to uproot her now. The good news is that I will be close to the military base where my son is currently serving. I said several times on this board that having to loving women to share my life with made me the luckiest guy in the world. I guess that sooner or later everybody's luck runs out. -
Allrighty, this has come up. I've been married to a wonderful man for 11 years, and together with my secondary partner for 11 months. My partner was the one who first introduced the concept of swinging to me, which I then discussed with my husband. My husband and I have been going to our local club since last November, and have had just a couple of nice swinging experiences. That part is all good. Now we're at the point of being interested in swinging as a triad. We know a couple of couples who know us as a triad. One couple seems pretty cool with the idea on the surface, but we haven't really discussed swinging with them, we're just at the socializing and flirting stages. Flirting has been going VERY well, amongst all parties. On the other hand, the other couple seems reluctant. The man of the couple has even gone so far as to suggest that we "find" another woman for my partner, so that he could be part of an "official" couple. It doesn't really work that way, though. If we put my husband in that situation, how reasonable is it to ask him to find another woman to bring along? Besides which, swinging for us is about exploring within our committed relationship, despite the fact that it's not a typical relationship. We don't really like the idea of playing separately, although I've gone to a house party with my partner when my husband was away for the weekend. We didn't play that night, by prearrangement, just went to flirt and stuff. So, any suggestions as to how we can make this work? Have other triads dealt with issues such as these?
-
I've explained my situation before, and we have moved past the cheating aspect, and are getting down to the nuts and bolts of what we both envision our relationship to be. Therein lies the problem. She has stated unequivocally that she is no longer interested, mentally or sexually, in sex with other men. What she envisions is, either we play with other women at parties (single or married), or we have a polyamory relationship with one other woman. I envision us being in the lifestyle, and being more flexible sexually. Where is the middle ground here? I have asked her if she is a lesbian and she says absolutely not. She said last night that all she wants is a big dick in her (which I provide) and a gentle woman to be her FWB (friends with benefits). I don't know what to make of this. I've never studied polyamory relationships, so I don't know if they work or not. Does anyone have any experience with this? I am making plans to build our house, and she wants to include a suite, with one large bed, for the three of us. Frankly, I'm a bit intimidated by this idea. Not from the sexual standpoint, but from the standpoint of a nuclear family? She has already said that she wants kids soon, as well. I have some experience with FMF threesomes, and like them a lot, but IDK if I would be interested in making it a permanent situation which is ultimately what she wants. -
Mrs YZF here. Almost a year ago we had Quita, a polymory third move in with us. It has been great. I have been into girls my whole life and so is she so it was good for me. YZF had two women when ever he wanted so it was good for him. She is the third, I am the wife. Those were the ground rules. Quita can come into our bed when ever she wants. She can sleep in our bed when she wants. She does not sleep with YZF unless I am not there. I do not sleep in another room so she can sleep with him. She gets everything I get. She gets to spend his money. He gave her a car. She does not get to spend the night with him at my expense. Those were the rules. They were not written down or anything, they were understood. Now this past weekend, I get booted from the room. "Something different" YZF said. Quita agreed. At least I think she agreed, the bitch does not even speak english! I can't help feeling that something is afoot here. Quita has been acting smarmy of late. I really do not know how to approach this. -
Ok - I have a situation at work and I need some advice...Let me set it up so you get the full picture. I'm in a triad (I'm the single live-in girlfriend). I work in an environment where this relationship style would not be accepted or tolerated if it was public knowledge. People at my office know Mrs. Menage as my best friend and Mr. Menage as my live-in boyfriend. I am forever being asked by people I work with when we are going to "tie the knot" or finally get married, why we don't, and on and on and on. I'm getting tired of repeating myself with people that I'm happy not being married, and having things the way they are. But because of the fact that I was previously married for 25 yrs everyone has this image of me as the marriage type and that there most be something wrong for me not to be married. Mr. Menage says I'm being too sensitive to the onslaught of questioning about this....what's your opinion and what would you reply to co-workers with if you were in my shoes? Thanks for the input! The Other Mrs. Menage -
My question goes like this - would it work (dating, playing) if a single male falls in love with a married female without even trying to do so, like how little by little you start to feel attachment. Has this happened? I want to learn from others experiences.
